Obstructionism

Wow, after spending over 550000 man-hours alive on Planet Enema – a.k.a. Earth before the 113th Congress convened – it means many a World Series has come and gone wherein, praytell I finally have figured out what the “7^th Inning Stretch” is all about. See, it has nothing to do with the fans, like allowing for an extended urinalysis because of the habitual guzzling down of too much of that piss ant beer brand – a.k.a. Budweiser. Do you know what “Bud” means in German slang? “grandma's underwear”. Do you know what “weiser” means in German slang? “stinky”. So just add the definitions together and you get the point! Honestly, why drink this crap if it makes you want to piss like there was no tomorrow? So the “Stretch” is a time out so the peon workers assigned jury duty in the dugouts can pick up all the crap and litter left behind by the players who may as well have “Slob” painted on their jersey. Newsflash: And today “Slob” was indoctrinated into the Pete Rose Hall of Shame! Pete was the greatest baseball player ever to play the game! Anyway, the “stretch” is job security I guess for the waste management “above” minimum wage earners, as I am sure with the “spit” that accompanies the dugouts trashed, it can be classified as a “Love Canal” zone – so maybe the workers are allowed hazardous duty pay! Yes, it comes to you in living 3-D “phlegm” in the comfort of your living room across that super wide TV screen! Thought that blurb flying across the screen was a bird it's a plane, think twice. See, I know, as the other day after watching Sarah Palin on the FOX during her narcissist like sermon wherein the Wasillabilly Queen enlightens her lemming followers how making out with a toad means slimy business, well I consumed way to much beer watching the melodrama. I thought FOX was supposed to be news' wise intelligent? When the bimbo broadcast finds Sarah & Company teaming up, well gag me with a spoon full of kaopectate! Now during this Palin frog follies and still not having to pee - as good brew stays with you and doesn't want to be pissed away like when Congress gets a hold of the Treasury's safe combination - while in couch potato mode the other day and surfing, I found this great America sport alive and well. No not FOX's fixation with the queen and her toad, but real live baseball. And like already mentioned, these big screen “I want to take over your living room” Best Buy addictions, I was amazed at how littered the dugouts were, when the camera man focused in on the spit shooting contests of the Major Weed Players. It was unbelievable to say the least, what a bunch of pigs! I hope when they go home to their families they put this child like rivalry away. “Spit you”. “Hey, spit you to”. Yuck! But it is the dugout trash crew that takes a beating, picking up after a few innings at bat because a tripping hazard now exists, and the way professional players like to sue the fans, we must make these sacred grounds “safe” or else. How come we never see attacks on the unions of major league sports, like we see with Scott Walker trying to make us all slaves? Look, when Farve regains his consciousness and litigates the hell out of the football network - ha, ha FOX - we will pay as the price of a can of “Grandma's Stinky Underwear” will quadruple, just to pay for Farve's retirement plus! Today's litmus test puzzler: “Is Bret more brain dead then Sarah – with that I can see Russia from here bullshit moment?” Look, the trickle down theory was made possible by your representative taking bribes from yes, “Grandma's Stinky Underwear” corporation with Citizen's United taking over. See, when the supreme beings made that decision – or opinion as it is called so finds no legal standing – it appears half the court had just finished watching the Queen on the FOX so were totally confused and the other half, well maybe it was the beer! “We the People” pay for everything. We pay for prisoners to lead a life of luxury as gang members. If your dreams early on in life aspire to a “prisoner” calling, hey 3-squares a day, no sweating allowed and free “Converse”! And on special occasions non-alcoholic “grandma's.... “We the People” pay for the Congress, to lead the life of prisoners, that luxury thing for theft upon the Constitution. Yes, it all boils down to the middle class being pissed upon some more. Damn, smells like “grandma's....So maybe with the commencement of the next game, maybe a salute to the trash crew. But here comes the surreal McCoy. What's with the umping? Color blindness sneak in? But when the camera crew was not busy tracking globs of spit exhausted from the orifices of multi-million dollar majors, low and behold, members of Congress have taken up a new sport. Yes, at Saturday's gig at Busch Stadium with the Cardinals against the Bean Town Behemoths, it was House Speaker John Boehner behind the plate, and couldn't tell a strike from a ball. Mitch was on 1^st and Alaska's Don Young on 3^rd – but he was wearing a Nancy Pelosi “Rabid Skunk” mask for Halloween! And Turd Cruz was supposed be way out in left field, but he was at face blasting practice, because he wants to grow up to be just like Dick Cheney. That's what I like about Obama's affordable heath care, as Mr. Scud Crud Cruz can get that artificial heart now, has here is an individual without a heart. So we see that with Congress performing the refereeing, it was like how they perform when in session. Let's see thinks Mr. "Tanman" Boehner, a strike? What's the hand signal from the lobby constituency say about that. “Balk,” Congress' greatest asphyxiation with representation. And in the final seconds of Game 3, Boehner called “Obstruction”, because the 3^rd base player laid down on his job and the runner, some lobbyist trying to get to “K” Street in a hurry, tripped. See, like with the bad habit spitting that goes down, it is how we are treated by Congress. We look up to them, as that body is supposed to represent our intent at fulfilling our dreams - that life, liberty and pursuit of happiness. But even so, the “spit runneth over”. Our national icons in the fields of green are littered with trash and spat upon with no remorse, and when laziness gets in the way they cry foul, and then we see the true blood reaction and it's called “Obstruction”? You're OUT! And Congress is well beyond the “3-Strikes” doctrine, isn't that a ticket to that jail? Now, that would not be a waste.... as long as Sarah was made the Warden with a whip!