Books & Writings by SPam McGee

Alaska Short Stack Stories, Series I, II, & III ~ Alaska's Deadliest Sin-Drill Baby Drill ~ Alaskan Company Man ~ Eklutna Lake Worrier ~ From the Fifth Floor ~ Hannah Cove ~ My Journey to Landes House ~ Poemetrics ~ Quinn the "Tanik" Eskimo ~ S.O.S. from Beaver Lake ~ The Teachings of the Swamp Fox ~ Trans-Alaska-Pipeline Funny Stories ~ Spirit Dog & the Ghost Wind


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Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Breast Cancer Reduction Act

Breast Cancer Reduction Act!
Remember when the Paper-Work Reduction Act made its debut? It was an act in-acted upon by Congress in efforts to cut down on paperwork. The question, did it work? See, following the act’s ribbon cutting ceremony, it seems government procurement went budget crazy buying printers. But that may have been OK, as paper is recyclable. What’s that? Oh, there was also a worker reduction act put in place at the same time in efforts to boost the congressional pay, so there isn’t anybody available to manage the recycling efforts. Can you imagine being in a position to give yourself a pay raise? So, as far as P-WRA, it didn’t do anything for nobody – except make toner cartridge distributors handsomely well-off. Yes soirĂ©e, just throw that damn black crap right into the landfills. And landfills are getting ready to infiltrate, with “trash gas” electrical generation. Think about it. Is all that garbage and crap breaking down to “methane” only? Anyway, I have taken it onto my own to declare a “bin” reduction act - or BRA - in efforts to streamline the delays when checking in at an airport. Look at it this way. Congress is out to lunch. The presidency is out to lunch. So somebody must look after my own good. Anyway, it means only one bin to escort one’s belongings along. So the motto can be “one bin, no sin”. So the other day I held my own trial debut. There would be no “bin” for the shoes. And no “bin” for the small carry-on pack I usually travel with. In the end, it meant only one “bin” for the laptop. Now I just happened to get stuck in a “Homeland” line that for some reason or another was built and designed by one of those monkeys under quarantine down at the National Institute of Health. Really, there was this damn building “I” beam right in the critical path, where you have to direct your own bags into the “tunnel of Hell”. And it was like a mini detour for cattle under siege! Confusion is what they like and nowadays the TSA can’t help move the goods along, something to do with liability laziness. And please by all means remember this tidbit. Don’t look entertained when in line, as the “Face Lift Behavioral Specialists” are watching your every smile. According to TSA briefings, the general public should behave like cattle being rounded up for slaughter. What gets me is this. I don’t smoke. And I don’t care if others smoke, but why in hell do these idiots have to smoke right at the door exits? And the other day, at this same airport I was trying out the “bin” idea, travelers were outnumbered at least 3 to 1 by the proud men and women in uniform. So it looked like a TSA smokers’ convention. No wonder health insurance is skyrocketing. Anyway, I finally succeeded in getting my sneakers, carry-on and laptop onto the gismo conveyor belt that shoots rejected suspected terrorist stuff back at innocent travelers like it is a Raptor missile engagement tryout. I saw one guy get his hand caught between “bins” during the reject act. He required medical attention. So I finally get through the maze of amusement, only to find my right foot’s sneaker “gone” astray. Maybe that is what caused the burning rubber smell! And when I tried to explain this to the agents, I was verbally prodded to move along. With that, I insisted on making a mini-scene, until out of nowhere two big bouncers quickly moved into arrest the commotion. I knew it was time to move on. You don’t mess with the TSA bouncers. Did you see that photo op when they made that poor young mom pick up a dropped then broken nursing bottle? They must import these goons from the Russian Gulag. So I was now walking through the airport lopsided. And I had to pee. And it was past noon, so urinals at the airports are on overflow. I was pissed, until I caught a glimpse of Katie Couric advertising herself in efforts to fight cancer. Really, she is the cover-girl for breast cancer check-ups. It is still a major atrocity right here in America. What a smile of life she portrays. Plus, she is a good looking babe! So it calmed my nerves. Then the thought came upon me that maybe I could get on the plane early, as I now had a handicap – being lopsided. Hey, how come everybody needing extra time to board a plane these days accounts for about 80% of the plane’s capacity? Because people cheat! So I thought I could play the same game. But that was a short lived possibility, as I was traveling on SWA, wherein seating assignment is replaced by chaos. Wow, it worked – the missing shoe routine – as I was able to recover a window seat. I would say that the boarding agents felt sorry for the one-shoed lopsided guy. It was good until Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble showed up to each take an entire seat plus an extra third to fit their fat asses upon. I am getting perturbed spending money for a seat and getting ripped off by only getting to use a portion of it. The airlines should have a rebate system. And Fred kept stepping on my shoeless foot, thinking that “myspace” was his floor space. People are truly rude when traveling. I had about enough room to read maybe a quarter length of the newspaper that was stuffed in the puke bag holding compartment. What is that stuff dripping off the paper? It smells like puke. Talk about puke, why in hell is Laura visiting Dubai in efforts to educate woman about cancer? Hey, idiot, what about the problem right here at home? See, if her idiot husband wasn’t spending all this money on some ridiculous war, maybe there would be more smiling woman around, just like Katie. But no, as many smiles are short-circuited by the bad news, which means get used to having a boob removed and then the loss of hair. It is such an atrocity, and Laura is out campaigning oversees. When right here and now my wife is going through the grieving process because “another” good friend has been given the bad news. Actually, the picture of Laura away from her castle – a.k.a. White House – was one for the record books of “OOPS”. And did you get a look at how uncomfortable Laura was when sitting there amongst ladies of a different culture? It was interesting, as all the ladies were so close that their bodies were touching, but Laura was sitting their like she was amongst lepers. See, these women had cancer! Yet, Laura had her legs crossed and had space. It was that body language thing saying she was pissed. Bottom line, it has been known for years that the number one possible breast cancer “seed” is that caused from “aluminum”. It is in body deodorant. That is where the lymph nodes can digest the metal. Hey, it has been known for eons that “heavy metals” when absorbed into the human dietary tract can over time cause everything to fail. Like the liver and kidneys. So, would a “light weight” metal be of any difference? And we get an extra boost of the “enlightening metal” from drinking out of aluminum cans - it is called the etching process. Hey, when I was a kid, we used soda to clean the metal spokes of our bicycles. Now when that stuff stays contained in a can on a shelf, you don’t think some kind of reduction reaction is taking place? Anyway, to see that mediocre advances in breast cancer have kept this debilitating disease on the forefront of the American female killing fields, it doesn’t sit so well. When at the same time we can spend billions for mediocre democracy infiltration. Maybe we need some new acts of contrition. But like mentioned beforehand, don’t expect anything tangible or concrete from Washington. It is called the “lame” decease. They are all out to lunch. And Laura, well she needs to get a life, and focus her efforts on extending life right here in this country instead of taking her stuck-up snobbish royalty attitude over to some rich oil country – where she can’t even feel comfortable amongst the “people”. She could go on the warpath against the big aluminum magnates. But that would mean siding with the democrats, and then she may also be in competition with Katie, and she doesn’t have the willpower or gusto to ever come close to competing with a real lady. Jealousy, a pretty lousy sin isn’t it? So Laura, your husband has squandered away a bunch of resources that could have cured this dreaded disease, or at least placed it on the endangered list. But no, his majesty thought that invading another country was more important. More important then “41,000” Katie Couric like smiles! So in a nutshell Laura, in 2006 your husband spent $200-billion to fund his stupid war. All total for that same year, only $2-billion was spent on breast cancer research. It is estimated that 35,000 people were killed in Iraq during the 2006 time-frame. On a comparison basis, 41,000 AMERICAN women died, because there is yet a cure for breast cancer. War, is it more important then a women’s smile? Breast Cancer Reduction Act, what a concept!

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Thursday, October 25, 2007

Just Shut Up!

Just Shut Up!
What is up with the referee that monitors the “just answer thy question” time allotment during these presidential wannabe debates? Oh, they are employed by FOX, so IQ missing is a prerequisite as the time keeper. And just how many debates are necessary? Instead of debates, how about a psychological evaluation test, sometimes called a “fit for duty” test. See, an employer cannot demand its employees to subject themselves to the “psycho” possibility, as it is against the law. Because psychoanalysis is based on “to lie or not to lie”, so it approaches a polygraph indictment. Remember, they tried it on Abe, with the cherry tree. Yet the “fit” test is allowed. But it is in disguise just that, a “psycho” test evaluator by a different name. So if the common worker is not immune from such persecution, I say let the candidates meet their match maker. That is all a psychologist is in reality, somebody that tries to match a politician’s behavior with some sense of ethics. It never passes the muster, as politicians are prone to a behavioral trait in line with that of Charles Manson – Helter Skelter relief! I feel sorry for some of these republicans that run on “gotta beat the bitch” agenda. Hillary I am talking about. If for one iota you don’t think that each and every GOP wannabe when behind closed doors doesn’t refer to her goddess as the you know what, you also are IQ lacking. Guys running for the top dog position must cringe when running against the opposite sex. See for guys, just like a male dog that has to lift, it becomes a balancing act. Whereas with female dogs, it means the squat upon you, which by right is never unbalanced. Actually, I would like to see Barb Bush run for the presidency. Talk about marking territory! We had the same thing make for laughter up here in Alaska, during the last gubernatorial debates, for governor. Frank the incumbent thought he had the re-election in the bag, as “Big Oil” had him by the “you know what it hurts”. Then the “Sad eyed lady of the low land” came along. Sara, “So easy to look at, so hard to define” unseated the saggy baggy elephant man. In reality, Frank lost the seat because his wife was always complaining that the bathrooms in private jets were just too damn small. That is when the voters realized we didn’t have a governor but a golfer. Maybe more like a gopher, with respect to “Big Oil”, has he designed enough escape away from taxation loopholes in the state’s oil and gas tax reform that it looks just like the old “Hippie Homestead Act” - claim it and it’s all yours. Hey, wasn’t Frank interviewed by the FBI? Oh, it was a wire tap. Get this. The FBI has hot-wired about a dozen Alaska state senators and also this state’s congressional delegates, Senator Ted and Congressman Don. It was all made possible by the “Patriot Act”. The same controversial act that the jerks voted on! They got caught in their own web! So anyway, it seems as though the wannabe make believers - GOP presidential prospects - take pleasure in making fun of Woodstock. Now anybody that fails to see the importance of this historic gathering, it scares me. One may not be all accepting to a free and open society, but this event was the greatest exercise of our 1st Amendment Right! Why? Because it involved the masses. So with due respect to those potentials that ridicule this out on the farm and field exercise in love, libido and the pursuit of sex, I would rather cast my vote for a slug. In fact during a most recent debacle debate, Madman McCain said something to the effect that funding for a Woodstock museum was preposterous, something Hillary voted for. I bet if somebody approached John with an interest to build a hostage museum, he would be applying the secret pork formula for his own statue. OK John, you were held hostage by the enemy during the Vietnam War, we were also held hostage back here in America - by corrupt politicians who gave us lie after lie after lie about the war efforts. As a matter of fact, we are held hostage again, and you are part of that corrupt political machine that continues to lie and cheat, with respect to what is really going on in Afghanistan and Iraq. So McCain, shut up about being tied up! These misfit candidates even have the audacity to make fun of Aerosmith concerts. Hey guys, this is AMERICA! To top a most recent debate off, there came a barrage of commingled comments like all the “Old Hippies” would appreciate an American Health Plan, because they would love the free drugs. Look idiots, we don’t need Viagra! And what is with that background laughing from the audience? It sounds so fake like prompted. Oh, that’s because Sean Hannity is acting like an IQ missing cheer leader, egging on the imposter American audience. Now here is a guy that I feel really sorry about. He is an insult to the Irish. Now just the other day, I was watching a Woodstock review. Those were such good old days. It was an exercise in the Constitution’s basic and dedicated principles. Maybe that is what is wrong with the republican presidential candidates, constipation. McCain always looks stuck up. Romney, well? And what is with this Fred Thompson make believe in reality a weirdo? Anyway, during such debates a question is asked. It is the same set of questions that have been asked for the last 10 elections. Like I mentioned beforehand, Congressional constipation! Then the EDFM – Explosive Diarrhea From Mouth – begins to compete with the clock. Ding, these idiots keep rambling on and on and on. See, I am not going to vote for an idiot that doesn’t understand and follow Simple Simon rules and regulations. Then again, maybe they are deaf, possibly selective hearing and will never hear a mom crying over her dead son’s military casket returning home. What we need at these debates is one of those Catholic nuns, with that metal edged ruler. Hey, out of time and out of line? Whack! So it goes to show one thing in common, that psycho evaluations should be a requirement, not just a consideration. Now the same thing happens during the Democracy debates. Exception, John Kucinich. This guy is pretty cool and campaigning on a peace and justice agenda. Much better then a “please no justice” campaign! So American voter, the test before us is not a complicated choice. We just need honesty and simplicity back as the agenda. The presidency has been tarnished, not by George, as he was just a puppet for the likes of Don “I like to shake Saddam’s hand” Rumsfeld, Dick “Dead Heart Beat” Cheney, Paul “Pre-emptive Strike I Like” Wolforitz and PNAC’s putrid punks. Cheney is the holdout of the PNAC leftist gorillas that believe that you cannot give peace a chance or “Imagine” that “war is over if you want it”. Anyway, I cast my presidential vote to Arnold. See, he has figured out a way to bring the troops home. His state is on fire, again. So he is calling off the National Guard troops assigned to watch the border. With that, the gap in Michael “Not My Shirt-off to Katrina Refugees” Chertoff’s coverage will guarantee that troop deployment is in the works. Why? The border is a more volatile subject then the war itself, especially for the presidential debates. Hey, what a concept I just thought about. America is a republic, right? And we live in a democracy, right again. So why is it that such entities like the GOP and DNC can claim ownership of the popular parties and time after time garnish away the popular and unpopular vote - when both parties are in contempt of corrupting this once great country and society? How about a name recognition change? For the Republicans, the “Constipated” and for the Democrats, “Runs”, and while we are at it, “Hemorrhoids” should suffice for the PNAC and for the independents, Woody! Now getting back to Woodstock and Alaska’s Hippie Homestead Act and also reminiscing when it was legal to grow and smoke marijuana in the 49er. Honestly, I feel sorry for a politician that never let loose and had a hit. And for a wannabe politician to use the debate forum to make laughter at something of national interest, like Woodstock, herein laughter is not the best medicine. We indeed need a national health plan, so constipational agendas can be challenged. And for the true “freedom” generation, maybe a good hit, of fresh air and more!

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Monday, October 22, 2007

Cesspool Runith Over

Cesspool Runith Over
I like to travel outside of Alaska, as it is interesting to witness “other” Americans practicing vigilante like dedication in efforts to uphold law and order. And recently I read where some concerned citizens had turned in their neighbors - for wasting water. There is a drought in the south land! And then there came the story about the off-duty policeman who called the on-duty men and women in uniform, because a neighbor was shouting out profanities, which is a misdemeanor in some states. Really, the arrest came about from what was considered a “public nuisance”, for disturbing the peace when this lady’s toilet overflowed! Now I heard it went “plugged” from a dump that held an image of John Thune. Called a “pareidolia”, for an image in natural phenomena. Like the “Nun Bun”, or “Jesus Tortilla” or the “Pope Tart”. What is with this guy Thune? Talk about an imposter. See, I take pleasure in ridiculing “other” states’ senators and congressmen when I travel, following that sentiment that it goes with the territory. Hey, Mark Twain made me do it! Honestly, it became a habit while living in the 49er, as political corruption is rampart up Alaska way - to the point it is allowing the rewriting of the book on “How To Screw the American Citizen’s Vote”. A majority of Alaska’s representatives are under surveillance by the FBI, for corruption. In fact, Alaska’s political clout has its very own club, called the “Corrupt Bastards”. Just like the Skull’n Bones, with hats, shirts and jackets with the logo, “CBC”. Rumor has it that Geronimo’s skull, in possession by John Kerry’s and George Bush’s own corrupt club - the Skulls - it will soon get another prized piece, Dick Cheney’s “dick”. So I pick on Mr. Thune based on the fact that he is probably on the same senate page as Ted Stevens with respect to views and opinions. I believe that page reads, “Intentionally Left Blank”. Talk about being watched, Ted’s house was raided by the FBI and IRS! Anyway my victim John was having a one-on-one with some news’ hour pundit and spun it all out of control. You could see it in his smirk that he knew too much on the subject of “WWIII, George’s Invasion of Iran”. Wait a darn minute, didn’t we arm Iran? Why is it that our representatives hide things of “national security” from us? It is our security, so we should know just what the hell they are up too behind closed doors. Most likely the secrecy and “All Americans Left Behind” is based on the fact that if the plan fails, there is no one to place blame upon. Politicians have made it clear and convincing that responsibility is somebody else’s responsibility. Matter of fact during Thune’s interview, he looked and acted like Castor Troy. From “Face Off”. In fact, it looked as if Thune’s face was authentic but it was suspect that it was Rick Santorum behind that “smirk”. Wow, cloning or face swapping, it is scary. There’s another political gem, Rick Santorum. There must be a lot of tired politicians, as there is no way in hell they can sleep peacefully at night, not when kids are dying in Afghanistan and in Iraq and in America. Really, since the opium harvest is back up and running wild in Afghanistan – it was banned before our occupation – drug related deaths and rapes are skyrocketing, especially in Alaska. Warning to tourists heading to the “Corrupt Bastards” state, bring a gun! So it makes me sick when guys like Thune even hint that Iran is in the crosshairs. Our ways and means seems to now follow that “Richie Rich” kid syndrome, wherein nothing is ever done for the good, but for selfish pity and selfish greed. Talk about a water shortage. I recently spoke with an individual “troop” who just finished his duty to keep secret the rest of the story. He mentioned that one of the biggest logistics problems in Afghanistan and Iraq is getting bottled water to the bases, sub-bases, and everywhere else the troops maintain vigilance. That puzzled me, as working at an Air Force facility in Anchorage I did gain an understanding that our military machine is always prepared. See, the battalion engineers knew that someday we may be engaged in warfare, in the desert. So they designed and built portable potable water purifying equipment. And they can set a well deep down in no time flat, anywhere in the world. Water is readily available, as a first priority just like a landing strip. So getting water for the troops was considered a done deal wherever George thought it was necessary to exercise Barbaricracy. But that wasn’t good enough in today’s theater, as water can make money. And get this, further research found that the war has become nothing more then a “whore like” money Now granted the troops need to be refreshed. But it goes to show that the multi-country war has become just a money maker, not just for the HailBurtons! What is with all these living lying commercials paid for by the “Big Oil” companies? It is scary, as “Big Oil” doesn’t give a rat’s ass about how they screw us more and more, not only at the gas pump, but what is up with the price of cereal? Please sing along, “From the farmlands, to the store shelves, with a price tag full of greed.” Anyway, oil today is running at $90 dollars. This country is running on empty. Ethics I am talking about. Without ethics, politicians don’t have to give a dam about nothing, except selfishness. They don’t even give a damn about our kids getting blown to smithereens. I was at the National Institute of Health not too long ago. Right across the street from the Bethesda Navel Hospital. It was jammed packed, with medical personnel here, there and everywhere. At the hotel just down from the hospital frequented by Navy men and women, I couldn’t help but to eavesdrop on nurses and doctors engrossed with disgusting talk over the injured kids. How many legs and arms have been lost? Try wiping your ass without the help of your arms, it means no hands! Then maybe the point of contention will sink in. So I make a proposition. Even though Constitutional term limits does indeed restrict Bush’s terms of endangerment, he should be kept in office until such time he fixes his own mess. Just cancel the 08 “Capathon” that has placed Hillary and Bama center stage. Hey, the cesspool is full. And maybe George will enjoy his detention to the point that he will engage and listen to Colin Powell, and an exit strategy will help our kids find their way home. Then at least Bush would have one thing that no other president can claim privilege upon, the longest yard! Detention, what a concept for all the “Corrupt Bastards”. Actually, how about a cesspool dunking, with proceeds going to charity to retrieve something of sacred importance! Now answer me this. Does that Skull and Bones club down Yale way really have “Geronimo’s” head on ice? How sick. It needs to be returned to its rightful owner, just like Afghanistan and Iraq and AMERICA.

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Thursday, October 18, 2007

Fishing Pole TAX

Fishing Pole TAX
It is a well established fact that gangs of “real” Americans and a few Alaskans have taken a fancy to pick on Congressman Don “Billy Goat” Young, but maybe it is time to give this guy a break. See, he must be slick. Now this personal opinion has nothing to do with that “sealed” appropriations bill that sat on his desk yet “mysteriously” was tweaked to include an “unasked for” $10-million dollar gift. For those not in the know, it was money for a Coconut Grove. Except, coconuts don’t grow where the landscape has been turned into the back 9! And such an alteration could have been caused by an office “ghost” as the Rayburn HOB complex where Don hangs out is very close to “KY Jelly” Street where Don also hangs out. Talk about “slick”! This now famous street is supposedly where disenfranchising the voters through redistricting came to be. Some guy named Tom Delay was the culprit behind this “Ban the Constitution” for everybody but “I” crap. For some reason or another, whenever I get writing about Don, Tom enters the picture, like they have something in common commotion. Anyway, such a slickness sickness can do better then that – better then Don’s almost best “Nowhere” bridges and “Nutcase” follies I am talking about. So why in hell would a House Bill contain a secret “tax” on fishing poles? H.R.3 – the Safe, Accountable, Flexible and Efficient Transportation Equity Act – contains a damn fishing pole tax! I would guess to help pay for crap, like bridges to Nowhere and a coconut grove! Hey, Alaska got the “bridge” money regardless of what every sane American thinks, believe me. That is why Bill “Nose Bleed” Sheffield hosted the Don Young and Bill Allen “Pork the Hard Working Americans” snob bash this year. Bill “Nose Bleed” is the Port Director and most likely has an interest in the Bridge Authority. But before the first bridge to nowhere is erected, we Alaskans are all waiting patiently for the Navy to deliver the “high-speed” amphibious assault passenger ferry. A ridiculous gift, from the Billy Goat. Did you know that the Anchorage Swat Team was put on alert for Don’s pig sty event? The powers-to-be thought that maybe things were to get a little out of hand, in light of all the corruption attention here in Alaska. And then Don had the audacity to send the leftovers down to the Town Square, so the peasants could feast. But only after the grub was heated up on a “VECO” grill! Maybe it is a sickness over slickness. Anyway, Sec.5213 of H.R.3 allows Don to collect an excise tax on sport fishing poles in the amount of 10% on the retail value. And this is no joke. This is how our representatives screw us from the left to the right and topside to bottoms up. Basically, in every “bend over” position they can think of, then some. Once elected, they take up residence in some far away place and have one and only one agenda and priority, screw Americans more and some more. That is why “Term Limits” is a long overdue action of importance. One cannot get so cozy with the system, as it has for eons lead to shenanigans which leads to corruption with only one way out, more corruption. And John Law is now paying attention. Finally, maybe we will get some of our money’s worth with the corruption probes going on here in Alaska. Now nobody in their right mind notices crap like a “fishing pole tax”, as it is buried deep down in the annals of cesspool sleazebag legislation. I would bet that there is also a tax on toothbrushes somewhere in the orifice legislation. Hey, don’t believe me, just try to understand your phone bill. It is all a ways and means to collect more money for scoundrel favoritism. It is in no way shape or form a legitimate “Taxation” as outlined by the forefathers of this country. But like mentioned before, the “Constitution” has been crapped upon by Don and company. Congress needs a Roto-Rooter job. Our system of legislation has become a backed-up cesspool of crap on top of crap. I learned to use the “crap” word from my U.K. friends. Talk about “slick”. That is what “phthalates” are all about. It is an additive in plastics, to make it slick and flexible. It is found in nipples and baby tooth soothing rings and yes, dildos. It is also known to cause cancer, liver disease and reproductive defects. But everybody was wrong with this adverse health assessment, as one lonely university here in America said it wasn’t a problem. I wonder who paid for that research? Anyway, even though it was not really safe, legislation was introduced into the House and Senate to amend the Child, Worker, Consumer Safe Chemicals Act. Now get this, it was to empower the EPA to police the levels of this “phthalate” crap in kids toys. The EPA, held responsible to look after our health? Not during Bush’s terms of endangerment! But nothing ever came to be in efforts to protect our little kids. Now get this. All proposed Congressional bills must get either a yay or nay within two years or it is cleared from the books! It disappears, for good. So that is why our representatives go into hiding. No roll call, no voting and no bill. In this case, one that was supposed to protect our babies. Dysfunctional? There comes a point in time wherein we must take matters into our own hands. I hope we start seeing more and more of “vigilante” type uproars. And plastic containing this pathetic “phthalates” from the Wal-Mart subsidized China is causing uproar in California. The Terminator is about to “terminate”. Really, Arnold is taking matters upon himself to do what our corrupt leadership has failed or refused to do – protect our kids. Hey, we need to protect these kids as they need to grow up healthy in efforts to continue fighting the Iraq blunder! It is now estimated that the earliest troop retreat date from that theater is 2037. Anyway, for the “Beach Boy” state, this is a mini-coup secession. Great I say. I always wondered what conditions allow states’ rights to supersede that of the Fed.’s? See, here in Alaska we enjoy our very own “Constitution”. It is my belief that the 49th state is jurisdictional above and beyond the crap that comes out of Washington – especially when Don gets attacked by a “rabid skunk”. Maybe California should secede from the Union. So should Alaska. So should….See, the House and Senate has become so corrupt, it has no retreat. Just like the Iraq War, no exit strategy. So by succession, there will no longer be a need for representation outside the local governance. So people can once again gain control of destiny. Wouldn’t that confuse the terrorists, if all of a sudden targets were no longer targets of interest? It is the “government” that the terrorists want to destroy, not the middle class here in America. Our own government is doing a good job of destroying the latter on its own, so the terrorists just sit back and laugh. Why isn’t there one damn Senate or House member speaking up when oil is now at $87.43 a barrel? See, the political system has become constipated. It also suffers from ED, both explosive diarrhea and erectile dysfunction. I believe feminism itch is also part of the problem. So the choice Americans have is simple. Pill the ailment away - which is just a temporary reprieve - or get rid of the disease altogether. The latter is the only way forward. And that is where secession plays an important role in righting this wrong way dead-end political “heroin” addiction that has corrupted the Union’s Constitution. Secession, wow, what a word, what a concept, hopefully someday soon a reality. Go get them Arnold! Arnold, rings a bell. That’s right, Benedict Arnold. Seems all of our Congressional bandits have taken a lesson from Mr. Benedict. It is called “TRAITOR”! Secession, our only hope.

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Sunday, October 14, 2007

American Pie

American Pie
Crap! Work duty is sending me to the lower 48. And to travel from Alaska, it means a disruption in sleep. So I am going to miss the “Greatest Show on Earth”. As Senator Ted “Under Investigation” Stevens is going to be the focal point of the Katie Couric anchor show. Now there is a neat woman! I don’t watch the morning show anymore, not unless Bruce is singing a protest song. Wow, 58 and coming out, against the “WAR”. Where the hell is Joan and Bob and… And our Ted is getting a little celebrity notoriety, while making a show here in Alaska - right this very week. But he wasn’t seen hanging around in Girdwood. Wonder why? He was here on a fact finding mission. What he found was this. It is easy to blame shenanigan irresponsibility on others. First found fact, Alaska oil production is down. Maybe because British Petroleum can’t keep the fire breathing dragon away! Second found fact, the Valdez Glacier has only retreated some 30-yards since he last visited this historical gold rush, earthquake, oil drilled, oil spilled town back in the 50’s. Damn, seems like the glacier in his own backyard down there in Portage is gone for good, something like a 7-mile retreat in 4-years time. But good for him insisting that we have to pay attention to “global warming” as this phenomenon is approaching its 100-year old birthday! Really, according to Ted, this thing has been a problem for a lot longer then he has been a sitting “duck” senator. Sounds more like “Global Moaning”. MoanaLisa, MoanaLisa, a vieille mule, frein dore. Interpretation: Unknown. And didn’t Al just win the Nobel Peace prize, for his addiction to the warming trends? Had it been around for as long as Ted would like most of us to believe, somebody would have already claimed the “prize”. Just what Gore needs, more money! Talk about patriotism. If the “other” party does one iota of disrespect with respect to the men and women in uniform – like messing with the “military budget” – a kamikaze like attack commences. Most likely funded by Boeing and Lockheed and Blackwater Jack. Wasn’t there a song about Blackwater Jack, by Carole King? “Blackwater Jack he bought a shotgun. Cause he was in the mood for a little confrontation…And on the whole, it was a very good year for the undertaker”. You never hear the military commanders go frustrated over funding shortfalls, as in the end when all the wasted spending goes drywall - similar to AWOL - the troops would still hit the trenches, even if they were out of ammunition. Hey, they still have a brave-heart and a bayonet. Anyway, I have to get to the airport. My wife wanted to drive me, but I chose to take a 222-2222. I need the language practice. That’s what so great about America, such an ethnic cornucopia. With that in mind, best place to practice language skills comes by spending time in the backseat of a cab. Now in my line of business, respect was afforded those with that so-called photographic memory. Cab drivers must be in that same category. Every city I visit, yet have I seen a cabby take out a map. Never once witnessed a cab driver getting lost! And city emergency response managers should include cabbies during evacuation planning, as these guys know more about the ins and outs then the weather man knows about which way the wind might blow. Now, it wasn’t due the fact that the weather was bad - the cab ride - just that it was early morning time. The latter makes it unsafe for ladies to be out and about alone. Guys get a little break from the lunatic street sleaze. Anchorage is the “crime spree” capital and the scale of criminal activity has upset the balance. In fact, it has tilted the scale. Even Morocco enjoys safer streets for its inhabitants. And some say that is where the terrorist hideout! Actually, it is where the French hangout. So now I have to be on my best behavior as the TSA has the “Behavioral Facial Expression Experts” on duty. Remember the posters that were found here, there and everywhere wherein it was stated that “God is Watching You”? We need it back, accept it should now read, “TSA is Watching You”. I wanted to tell that young girl she was being watched, by a bunch of sexually deprived ancient men – all decked out in those “blue” uniforms of importance. See, she was bending over during the shoe removal processing and her “thong” started to second as a bra strap. Soon it was to hell with the X-ray and eyes all around were lowered to half mast attention. Really, I think out of boredom the TSA has invented this secret “hand” signaling. Hey, the guys in prison do it. Soon Tom will be learning it. Was there really a Tom Anderson rally at the Ann Stevens building in downtown Anchorage? Who owns that property? Anyway, grasping the coveted prison hand gestures code is good for Tom, as it gives a heads-up learning experience wherein this cry-baby felon can share his expertise with Pete and Vic and Ben and….Can’t I not even laugh? This TSA guy thought I wasn’t acting like a cow, so he started asking stupid questions. Wow, made it through once again on best behavior. I wonder if one can wear a mask through the homeland gates? It is getting close to Halloween, so why not. I have this fake Don Young mask that would be a gas to try out! Hey, there is commotion at the Gate C8 podium! It looks like Ted in the raw. And with the temper tantrum, it must be our beloved senator who likes keeping company with the FBI and IRS. False alarm, but it could be a “Ted” mask. Damn, the airlines have succeeded in obeseifying a 757. I bet cattle travel in better conditions then this. And here is what gets me. I was a “Good Samaritan Passenger” for the young lady sitting by the window, with a 16-month old miniature Ted – “mini-Hulk”! As I was allowing the use of my table tray for her depository, which consisted of all kinds of crap. Is that a used diaper? Soon it was table top on overload! But there was not a flight attendant to be found and it was a 5-hour flight! And when they must do the duty, they run the isles like there is no tomorrow, like they do not want to mingle with the animals. If this plane goes bump, there is going to be shrapnel gone wild, just from 37B. I have an idea to enhance travel. Take that “Flight Attendant” call button, the one that arouses everybody’s attention like a terrorist is asking for directions, it should become a different kind of button - like a trash pickup icon. Maybe a decal of “Oscar the Grouch”. What I get a kick out of is when you get to your destination about 20-minutes early. The pilot comes on like this is a major accomplishment. Wow, then the bad news, as the arrival gate is already booked up with an outgoing flight, so just stay patient and you will arrive on time, not early, not late, but as planned. So you have to camp out for what seems like an eternity. And everybody races for the hidden “cell”. What the hell did we do to get along when cell-phones were something that only prisoners were aware of? I had a $35.00 glass of wine on my way to the Spirit city. See, I had this airline voucher from a previous flight that was cancelled because the flight crew complained about a foul odor on board. So I splurged on the final leg of this trip and used it on a 1st class upgrade. The wine was supposed to be free, but I was a little confused to what warranted the high price for the upgrade. Oh, a normal sized seat! I am running for any of the political offices that will soon be vacated as the Alaska FBI raid continues. My platform will be new and exciting. As far as the airlines, all planes will be government issue, one class only with seats that fit the obese so I don’t get stuck paying full price for a 2/3rd’s size seat. It will cost you though, with 50% of your income going to Uncle Sam. But traveling will decrease by the same. Finally, an arrival gate in sight. Hey, the shoe shine guy has a framed picture of Missouri’s elected officials. Alaska’s representatives are soon to be framed. And get this, when I went to relive myself, I noticed there is a framed picture of Larry Craig in the airport’s outhouse John. I noticed it because it is late at night and construction crews were installing this heavy mesh like screen so “no more footsies”. It confuses me these days, the way we fix problems! Back to Anchorage. The construction crews are real busy here at the Ted Stevens International Pirate ship. See, they are preparing another area for a wildlife display. It will be dedicated to the Katmai “pet” bears that are being gunned down as they no longer have a fear of humans. Really, somebody in their wisdom decided it was time to allow big name big game hunters to shoot Yogi and company. And these bears have names, so this new display will be the mounted bears, names and all. Hey, you won’t be able to photo shoot the live bears any longer, so the stuffed ones at the airport will have to do. Anyway, I guess Ted blamed every body and his brother over the fact that “global warming” is causing the coast of Alaska to float away to Russia. Sounds more like “global moaning”. He had a temper tantrum because “no one asked” for money to help rescue the erosion problem. See, we went spoiled in this state, as things just showed up and “no one” was ever required to ask for help in the first place. You won’t find a single Alaskan that asked for those “Bridges to Nowhere”. Or a single sane Alaskan that asked for that road money for Coconut Grove. Anyway, over time we became complacent, and learned that we didn’t have to ask for things. And this erosion thing affecting Alaska’s coast because the ice pack has disappeared, every 3rd grade student knows it’s a problem. To say you are appalled that nobody has asked for money, what a cop-out! Ted, if you didn’t know about this problem, you have no business representing “people”, try cattle instead. Maybe that is what happens once you win that seat and head so far away, you loose touch of what is really happening in this state. Anyway, it is sad when you try to blame innocent true grit Americans. And answer me this. How come you knew all about the “erosion” on the banks of the Kenai River? Wherein you sent millions to a buddy, who never asked for it. Don’t you think that the money could have been put to better use, like saving a villager’s home? Instead of pacifying Boeing executives and Blackwater Jack creeps who would descend upon this sacred river each and every year, for that “Crap Classic” you would sponsor. Bottom line, instead of the blame game, lets have a sane game, where we all get on the same page and get things in our own backyard’s fixed. But when one looks at New Orleans and the convincing evidence that we build to destroy, what can one expect? What really irks me is the sad fact that you Ted, continues to support a war, when that money should be exhausted right here on our own soil. It is “my” money that you throw away. Pushing democracy on another country when at the same time our coastline is disappearing, it goes to show that this country has its priorities “tilted”. And without due respect, that was supposed to be your job, what we paid so dearly for and will probably pay more fines for a long, long time to come. By, by Miss American Pie! No lie.

CopyRight 2007 – Dixie Productions/MSK Media/Eagle Rock Press
Contact: or or

Alaskan Poet Fellow

Office of the Publisher 10 October, 2007
Poetry Division
London, U.K.

Dear S. Pam MaGee, Nom de Plume,
Recently, I was discussing the appointment of this year's Poet Fellows with various editors, colleagues, and publishers. The Poet Fellowship is an elite group of international writers who share a common passion for writing. In recent years, the number of Poet Fellows has grown with members from all over the world. It started in London and then quickly spread to New York, Paris, and Venice . . . and now its members literally circle the globe. It is with great enthusiasm that I am officially inviting you to join this legendary group as a Poet Fellow. This is a marvelous opportunity for you to finally join the upper echelon of poets and writers.

Freedom of the Pen
by S. Pam MaGee, Nom de Plume

What defines Freedom?
Answer not mine.
Then what warrants Freedom?
Merely life shall suffice!
Yet I have life.
But this Freedom?
Is yet to bring.
When even though I hear someone sing.
“Let Freedom ring”.

So my dreams fulfill Freedom missing.
But such it merely that,
Only this dream!

Yet with pen in hand,
This Freedom does bring that ring!
Alas, be it the only Freedom won.
Is that of this pen and written upon.

Freedom not denied,
But Freedom defined!
My 1st Amendment Right,
Is that right to life.

Let Freedom ring,
I now can sing.

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Body Parts

From the Old News is still Good News Diary:

Email For: Representative Lesil McGuire

Sent: Friday, June 2, 2006

~ Will the Real Crook Please Stand Up ~
From the Chinook Journal of S. Pam MaGee

As most “Alaskans Left Behind” may or may not be aware, Lake Otis Parkway is no ordinary drive-by. From the Tudor intersection towards Avenue 36, the terrain has been transformed into a first class medical neighborhood. Building continues, year after year. It is an almighty investment. And good planning, as it is in close proximity to the University of Hamilton, the Anchorage Edition youth jail and Providence Hospital. And it is situated not too far from the other major hospitals, including the Pink Elephant. The original pharmacy on the corner of 42nd, a historical landmark, continues to be swallowed up by high-rise medical outlets. From day surgery accommodations, dental, sight unseen to pet clinics! Just like a modern day city, it is a professionally established domain, all together now. Most cities utilize one-stop medical facilities, as it cuts down on the overall costs associated in efforts to satisfactorily cater to the unhealthiest civilization ever to roam the earth, Americans! This type of convenience makes staying unhealthy easy. So to pick up the Daily Rag and read about the state giving away money to some outfit to purchase an old establishment far and removed from mainstream medical row, it makes no sense. And it is in itself a medical facility. Hey, whatever happened to legitimate businesses taking out loans? All good bankers know it is their duty to provide loans if the request application meets strict criteria, that return-on-investment deal. So this giveaway scam is beyond ridiculous! The state has nothing to gain from this. In fact, it is just as bad as Denali Commission money secretly loaned out to build a pizza shack or a peanut galley! And the building I am talking about in this current caper is old, most likely built during the asbestos era. How come we have this mentality that insists on buying buildings constructed during the asbestos era? Hey, don’t we now own the Seward asbestos arcade? And isn’t there another asbestos arcade down in Ketchikan that is on the must have must buy list? But I guess with the price of oil refreshing the state coffers with more allowances, the kids in diapers have no qualms about the explosive depositories. So who really owns the Ann Stevens Building? Now to start off, where in high-water hell is there a leadership that can be trusted with oil bucks hot off the press? Hey, you put money in a legislature’s hands, right off the bat they are thinking of how to turn it into a deficit. Now according to the Rag, the state is about to give some medical outfit called Life Alaska Donor Services a $750,000.00 dollar “freebee” so they can buy the third floor of this old building now mortgaged to the Alaska Chapter of the Red Cross! At the same time, the same clowns down in Juneau are giving the Cross an additional $150,000.00 dollar “freebee”, so the combined giveaway can pay off the mortgage. Something wrong here? Doesn’t seem to be, even though the owner of the tissue outfit is the dad of Representative Lesil McGuire, but that bears no consequence on the outcome of the “pork” handout – trust me! My friend works for a non-profit outfit that is working with the city to revitalize the Mountain View area of Anchorage. For those of you “Alaskan’s Really Left Behind”, this is where Anchorage really started out as a city, but it has been “Left Behind”. Anyway, my friend and the staff have to work endless hours, just trying to get a few bucks here and a few bucks there to promote this area. They work by ethics not by “who’s your daughter”. The bottom line, if the state has money to burn for the tissue man, spend it over in Mountain View. It will be closer to where you can get body parts! Anyway, like is the usual case, the one and only Rag provides just a smidgeon of the true story behind yet another Alaska atrocity when it comes to corrupt political shenanigans. And now for the rest of the story! Who really cares? But just out of curiosity, who really owns
the Ann Stevens building?

CopyRight 2006 ERP/MSK Media From the SHORT STACK IV

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Friday, October 12, 2007

Playboy Man

Just the other day on TV, I saw you enjoying life in the company of three women, on a trip to Europe. That is when the thought occurred to me, that I was remiss in my duty, to give credit where credit is due. So I composed this letter to offer up thanks, indeed a long overdue thanks. I am in my 50’s, and like most men of my age group, you stood out our hero in youth. You may not have realized it then or now, but you taught us a whole lot. Take for instance the importance of independence. It was like this. When the opportunity came about to tag along for a free meal out with the parents, which was seldom afforded due to middle class wages of our parents’ generation, many of us chose to stay home. Why? Well with mom and dad off to dinner, it was an opportune time to raid dad’s closet or drawer, to secretly take advantage of that stash of Playboy magazines hidden away. And being home alone, it allowed us to gain our independence. So to this, we thank you. I speak for many similar situated juveniles during our growing up years. I do believe that every house on Clarner Street – an Irish mixed with English mixed with German mixed with French mixed with Italian and for the most part a Roman Catholic neighborhood located in Pawtucket, Rhode Island – each held a secret stash of Playboys. Dads around here were salt of the earth type true Americans, war veterans, hard working millwrights, so the Playboy possession must have been something of an icon indicating success. Finding the prized magazine was what went on when the parents went away. And that independence took on an overwhelming exercise in “freedom at last” when the parents went off for a weekend getaway, and we could prove to them that we could go it alone. Passing the grade for self-independence followed that “baby step” routine. At first it was scary, home alone. But finding the magazine stash occupied our interests away from any doomsday thoughts. Like thinking and worrying that the house was going to burn down! The magazine became our guiding strength to obtain success with being independent. There was a mystique of strength that emanated about while in possession of the magazine. It was something truly heroic and truly American. Hey, the magazine to us youngsters held more power then the next in line amendment. Let us face the facts, it was an exercise in the 1st Amendment as it was an exercise in the right to privacy. Really, if when home alone one of the boys of the family was negligent with say the cook stove and soon the house was filled with smoke, what was more important to save, the shotguns or the magazines? Lets face the facts again, the guns were just cold metal monsters. On the other hand, the Playboy magazines were worth their weight in gold. So that comfort level to stay home alone grew, it went from hours to days - it polished our independence. A stack of magazines required a whole lot of study time. So days away parents meant days of freedom with dad’s stash. Hey, the longer the time away the better. But we always dreaded the problem of making sure the magazines were put back in proper order, as if dad may have been setting a trap! And then there was the realization that moms back then were stay at home moms, so who was really setting the trap? Bottom line, moms knew about the magazines. And now I believe that it was not a trap set for punishment, but one that proved coming of age. The Playboy magazine meant much more then “girly” pictures. It had deep routes in adult development. And earlier on in our youths, as swamp rats hanging out down at the Red Devil Mill on the Ten Mile River, it was the magazine that gained our interest to hang out where big wharf rats liked to hang out. See, this was where locals threw away household trash, including used magazines. So we became scavengers for the goods, of most interest the discarded Playboy magazines. Shelters, more like shrines, would be built to hide and protect our precious treasure chest. And we would defend our territory at any cost. I bet today, that those shrines forgotten still hold secure the goods! It was like the first thing that was recycled. So that is why you were a hero to many American youth. You taught us to exercise and enjoy independence and to defend what was rightfully ours. You made us not afraid of our Constitutional rights. You were a man ahead of your times because your magazines promoted recycling efforts. And in reality, your magazines were much more. You were the person to promote openly the greatest art of the Creator, that of a women. And with that, attention to finding his artwork in the greatest of all museums, all around us, no admission necessary. At the same time, you promoted an intellectual forum, for things important to society. In my case, I did learn to enjoy the writings. From a kids standpoint, very complicated but worthwhile to at least make an attempt to understand it all. See, during my youth, I was not a very good reader. Which meant I was a terrible writer so came horrible report card grades. Bottom line, “the little train that could” was boring reading. So I suffered with grammar and English. But through attempts to read the articles, even though not totally understood, it fostered within me a skill that has allowed the writing spirit within me to come alive. To date, I have authored 13 books. I realize now that the magazine may have planted that seed within me. So I am sorry that it took so long to say thanks, but maybe because you were part of the guiding light of life for many youth and we are now successful, maybe your influence keeps us driving towards perfection of life. Just too busy to look back at how we got to where we are, and who along the way helped out. You surely have achieved the highest of goals, we are followers, still. So even though for most of us it was our own dad that won first line hero honors, put aside nepotism and there is only one other hero, Hugh. If anybody deserves the “Man of the Universe” award, it is Hugh. I hope someday soon, somebody produces a movie that goes back to small town America and discovers just what kind of positive influence you were on thousands of young men, pointing us in the direction of independence and showing us many other statesmen like attributes. So we thank you, Hugh!

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Senator Comeback

From the Old News is still Good News Diary:

Email For: Senator Con Bunde
Sent: Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Charge of the Right Brigade – Greatest Show on Earth!

I’s getting older, no doubt about it. So sometimes it is difficult to “eyes” the fine print. See, the entire TV guide comes hot off the press in the “fine” print, testament that editors have taken over where science has failed. Yes, it is possible to shove 2-pounds of garbage in a one-pound bag. Then again, maybe medical science maintains a foothold in this seeing-eye caper and it is a conspiracy orchestrated by the Optometry Guild. So I don’t bother to use the guide as a guide, as one doesn’t want to admit sensory defect defeat. Which means the only other possibility is to channel “surf”, wherein one basically watches nothing that makes any sense. It becomes a time-line of bits and pieces that doesn’t amount to Ben squat. Just like politicians in session. How is it that with all the hi-tech stuff these young technocrats come up with we are still held hostage by commercials? Anyway, I was about to watch a show called Antiques on the Road Show or Secrets of the Dead, whatever! Low and behold what was being received from the National Public TV broadcast. Now most of the time, reception is poor quality for this station, even though it is a digital signal from a cable that is supposedly free of noise. But I live in close proximity to the Christian Radio Tower that towers over Anchorage, so I am convinced that there is a transmission problem. And I can prove it because the radio in my vehicle behaves the same, when tuned to the National Public Radio station. “White” noise from frequency stomping makes it almost impossible to hear the weatherman tell which way the wind blows. It is a borderline illegal activity. But they get away with it, as it is consistent with the “Charge of the Right Brigade”, in efforts to destroy the separation between church and state. Anyway, back to the Antiques on the Road Again show. Damn it is good reception tonight! Again, at first I thought it was going to be either a show about old furniture on display or an historical about a sunken treasure ship. But to my surprise, surprise, surprise, it was Ted Stevens giving his “State of the Pork” address to the Alaska legislature, minus Ben and Tom. See, Tom is busy trying to raise money for his Defense fund. Ben, where is the little runt? Hey, it looks like he’s hiding behind daddy! Anyway, I was up for some entertainment, so I watched the Secrets of the Dead. Take that back, as Antique on the Road Again was still more befitting. It was the Greatest Show on earth, for the time being. Good “Old” Ted. This guy doesn’t give up as he tried once again to pull the wool. See, it is spring break, so the senators are taking another break. And they just had an entire week off for President’s Day. Yes, a whole week! It must have something to do with the senate chambers calculator. So with due respect to broken record “highlights”, Ted wants to make ANWR part of the “Strategic Petroleum Reserve”. Because he has failed - For how many years? - to get this place opened to oil exploration and exploitation. Thus in efforts to save face of legacy, he reaches into his bag of desperate tricks. This is beyond ridiculous, as there remain more then enough obstacles to even consider this madness. To include a “big” unknown as a national interest doesn’t make sense. Why? First, everyone must realize the effect the so-called “Reserve” has on the price of motor gasoline. Just the other week, George Bush decided it was necessary to increase the “reserves”, not in Iraq, but in the salt domes! This occurred for no apparent reason except that the price of oil was slipping to 4-year lows. Hey, is it any wonder that HailBurton stock has quadrupled since the “war” began! I hope this state doesn’t have any money invested in this company’s shenanigans, no matter how well this outfit is doing ripping off Uncle Sam. Anyway, it has a drastic effect, this “Reserve”. And most of the time with increases, decreases and exchanges of oil, it is just a paper ordeal. But it still effects the bottom line, as it means oil that was “paper” destined to a refinery is now “paper” destined to the “Reserve”. It shortcuts the supply and demand balance equation, the result being higher prices at the pump. So if Ted and Lisa were successful in their efforts to “Reserve” ANWR, just the fact that there is no existing infrastructure would cause the price of motor gasoline to increase, until such time that there was an infrastructure. It seems this is more in tune to a Don Young motor gasoline tax that is temporary forever! And “gas hydrates”? What is Ted thinking about? The natural gas that is trapped in the ice will remain in the ice, it is that simple. There is no feasible way to extract it. So to use the numbers that relate to the ice trap accumulations, as part of the U.S.’s “Strategic Reserves”, it is in-line to Alyeska’s so-called “Strategic Reconfiguration” blunder, wherein the costs overruns will be seen at the pumps! And isn’t it about time that the Denali Commission is exterminated? I like using that word – exterminator – as it seems that indicted Tom Delay is back in action, as the devil. Lets face it, what is the devils discipline? “No surrender, No Retreat”. So it is time past that the funding for the Denali Commission is done away with. We can do without it. What has this state gained from this program after so many years of taxpayer abuse? I have heard some of the horror stories, like free snow-machines for recreation. Sure there is abuse, prove me wrong. So I hope not for continued funds. But Ted’s doom and gloom speech seemed to be routed in “less” pork from the Pork King, it has a rhythmic reasoning. There is a protracted war going on that has so far cost billions! He doesn’t mention that at all. That is why many of us cannot stand this misrepresentation. It is spin designed to pass the blame for their failures upon the “other” party. Now Ted’s speech became the “Greatest Show on Earth” when Mr. Heckler invaded Ted’s domain to protest the “Iraq War” blunder. Ex-Pro Tempore went flabbergasted, even though the Daily Stool said he kept his cool. Did you hear what he muttered under his breath? Sorry, can’t repeat. So cool and calm composure was not what I witnessed, but then again, maybe it was my deteriorating vision. Except my wife, who has 20/20, she made the same observation. And I really get a kick out of the Daily Stool’s day after pill, wherein it mentions some individual named Con Bunde voicing a silly concern over Mr. Hecklers outburst. Sorry, I don’t seem to recognize the name! But since “silly” seems to have some affiliation with the lawmakers, I quote: “The issue is there is a time and place and show some respect for the process”. Well Con Bunde, the process has been given more then enough time, why not give peace a chance? I for one am sick and over-tired of seeing our young kids come home in a box! And then you ramble on as if by order the “Charge of the Right Brigade” or may it be you are suffering from explosive diarrhea: “He(Mr. Heckler) can debate his issues all he wants and has every right to his opinion, but to impose it on 60, 70 or 80 other people by jeering and screaming is completely inappropriate”. I believe we have been infiltrated by communists in “them there Juneau chambers”! See, it isn’t just a handful of people that this speech is intended for delivery, this is a forum for the citizens of ALASKA! It is not intended just for your selfish inklings. So it is evident that you people down there believe in prejudice upon the populace. This was probably the best forum to speak thy peace! I think I now know how Rosa Parks felt when day after day she walked from the back of the bus, during the days of segregation. I can just hear chambermaids like Con Bunde back then. “Sorry Rosa, this jeering over who sits in the back of the bus is inappropriate.” You are a chambermaid aren’t you? Isn’t Con short for Condalessa. Like in Rice! Now the best part of Ted’s speech came when he admitted that he had no idea that the “Patriot Act” was changed recently to allow Gordzilla to “fire and appoint” Federal attorney generals without Congressional approval. This is our Senator! I knew this shenanigans went on, and I work for a living! But I still have time to find out what is important. And I would bet my bottom dollar that Ted knows all about the earmarks and steermarks that sends more and soon to be less welfare to this state, one that has the largest oil fields in North America. So for a U.S. senator to not have an idea of what is going on in front of him, especially with respect to the “Patriot Act” and for an Alaskan senator to not be open to hear the voice of the people, I believe we have a case of sensory deception, that you see and hear only what you want, selective! Sounds like “Big Red” has been revitalized! And in the end, your “Charge of the Right Brigade” will fail!

Con Man’s Reply:
“What a rant! Apparently, volume plus quantity equals logic in your view. You must be mistaking me for someone who cares about your opinion.”

Writer’s Reply:
Thank you for such a quick response. May I have your permission to publish such? I will assume no response means no objection. Thanks once again.

Con Man’s Follow-up Reply:
“My reply to you was a personal response to your irrational tirade. If you would care to have an interview for publication, please contact me at 907-465-4843.”

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Thursday, October 11, 2007

Truth In Lending

Truth In Lending Statement
Yuck, what gives with this “Truth In Lending Statement” that the banker pulls from a secret under-desk location and throws innocently your way once all the paper work is signed, sealed and delivered? And after your down-payment has already been cashed out. Plus your wife has already begun moving her wardrobe into the new house. Can’t turn back now! Who is making all this “extra” cash? I don’t know about you, but my mortgage has been sold to a zillion different offshore outfits. Somebody is making out like a bandit as I am sure a “non-profit” gets slipped in here and there somewhere along the way! And with those ARM rip-offs, a lawyer for one of the now “homeless” is convinced that some of these scam artists work offshore, from a place called “Atlantis”! No wonder Uncle Sam is going broke, the deficit is taking on an entire new dimension. Isn’t it time that “Religion” gets taxed? In fact, I am throwing my name into the Congressmen Don Young’s seat assignment follies. My platform will set in motion a moratorium on worker income tax and demand all religious’ denominations to pay up, just to see how it all averages out. Anyway, enough of the “Lending” stuff and on to the “Truth In Spending Statement”. The latter has to do with “Shareholder” responsibility. When the price of oil “tanked” back in the mid 90’s, “Big Oil” working here in Alaska had a choice, feed the workers or invest in the infrastructure. It was an easy decision to make but feeding was cheaper, so guess what? And it was at the same time that everybody and their brother was becoming bonafide “Shareholders”, as that is how we all build up a retirement nest egg, by having our 401k gurus invest wisely - while we continue to work. But over time, “shareholder” demands became front and center - above responsibility - as we all wanted more return on our investment. So NO, those workers cannot have a raise. And instead of feeding them bacon and eggs, porridge will suffice. Talk about a “Mobius Strip” phenomenon. Say you are a worker and a shareholder under the same fiduciary umbrella. Do you vote yourself a raise or not? What goes in your pocket goes missing from your investing! It reminds me of the novel I am working on, called Sadie’s War. Sadie was an elderly widow that relied on her deceased husband’s single investment – tied to the corporation that had employed his skills for many years as a welder. She never worked, so S.S. was not an option. And her medical coverage was mediocre. So she prided herself when at teatime, boasting to her friends how well she was doing on her own. She became interested as an active “shareholder”, attending the meetings and searching the “Net” for valuable information about the corporation’s holdings. All was good until she found out that an affiliated sub-company was covering-up an environmental nightmare. This little old lady wasn’t about to let the corporation get away with it, even if it meant loosing that nest egg. She started causing trouble at the meetings. Soon she was targeted by a “Goon Squadron Gone Wild”, so turned to a bunch of Vietnam Vets for help. See, her son was killed during the war. The Vets were platoon comrades with her not-forgotten son. So the 60’s aged war machine - with Sadie at the helm - went alive and well and justice they did do, Rambo Style. Anyway, a little sidetracked I went. I guess you should have read that “Truth In Storytelling Statement”. Anyway, “Big Oil” is under the pen again. Several fires have caused disruption in oil flow from up north. That hurts the state’s income. It also hurts the “shareholders” demands. What I despise? Every time “Big Oil” does something wrong this state’s officials - who have been remiss in their duties to begin with - they have to appoint some new committee with a fandangle of a name that is so long one could never find it in the phone book. Anyway, the recent fires up in Prudhoe Bay have targeted the turbines that run pumps and generators. Without turbines, no pumps and no electricity. It means no oil! Without oil, shareholders cry. Now these contraptions are indeed like an aircraft engine. Except for the fact that it is a stationary piece of equipment operating at temperatures that approach 1200 degrees Fahrenheit and speeds of 15,000 RPM’s and using enough natural gas in one day’s time that it is enough to heat your house for 10-years! So why all of a sudden these fires gone wild? Blame the “Shareholders”. See, these cast-iron beasts are 30-plus years old. Not the “shareholders”! And this kind of equipment has a life expectancy to it. A stationary gas turbine can only run so many hours or “start and stop” cycles. After that, send it to the bone yard. Time has a tendency to stress things out of round. That is why you will very seldom see OEM technicians rebuilding these ancient units on the ”Slope”. Why? There comes a point in time where liability rules! Some OEM outfits will not touch these units, as it is time expired and time to buy news ones. These turbines - for the most part delivered during the 1970 sealift - should have bit the rust dust a long, long time ago. So you can’t blame this on the boomerang effect. That is where a boss begs for money for replacing worn out stuff and is told by the governance board - elected by and for the shareholders - a big fat “No”. Then something drastic happens – like a fire that lowers production – and the boss gets blamed for the loss anyhow, for shabby maintenance. Now even with the price of oil at an all time high, it is still the “shareholders” responsibility to make sure what is making their investment grow has the means to support it. Why is it that Sir John Brown was booted out as the CEO of the British outfit that according to everybody and their brother is not fit to fight turbine lube oil fires? And why did his majesty’s governance board file a lawsuit, against the “Sir’s” retirement? It just doesn’t make sense. We cannot have our cake and eat it to. It has become a catch 22! And why is the TAPS pipeline operator under the gun and microscope by Sir Hamel? See, there is an ongoing project on the pipeline that is three times over budget and way behind schedule. But the agent in charge doesn’t have any control, as it hasn’t taken ownership in this fiasco to un-man the pumping stations. The contractor owns it, and several outfits – including VECO – are making a killing over this delay and dismay tactics. Most of the contractors have been involved in the oil industry here in Alaska for a long, long time. They often times - like for 30-years - got away with it, until Sarah became the new sheriff in town. But it still remains the golden goose fleecing of Alaska’s resources. Case in point #1. A guy that is a partner in the consulting firm that provides management expertise for this “Strategic Blunder Project” was riding around in an old jalopy just a year ago. Now it is a Mercedes Benzene, limited “pipeline paid for it” addition! Oh sorry, he also gets a royalty for “BIG WILDLIFE” posters that are showing up all over town. Case in Point #2. Why did this “management” contractor go hawkish against an electrical inspector and deny this guy back on the project, when the pipeline owner’s wanted him back? Maybe it was because what the guy was finding was not up and up with the contractor’s deliverables? “Hurry up and sign it off, as we need to get a big fat payment”. And why are the Fed.’s investigating “missing” inspection weld reports? You answer that. It must be a “shareholders” demand! All I can say, sometimes the blame targets the correct entity but goes astray with “identity theft”. It is basically an internal catch 22, and it sometimes can get things pretty hot around the collar of greed! The greed game has ignited these fires and lack of “shareholder” responsibility fuels the intensity, wherein lives have already been lost because this agenda “be there these almighty riches” rules. But the worth of a human casualty is all so calculable, by the shareholders and for the shareholders, for their own selfish shortcomings.
CopyRight 2007 – Dixie Productions/MSK Media/Eagle Rock PressContact: or or

Have Another Hit...

Have Another Hit…
“Of fresh air.” So those opposed to lifting the ban on “Emissions Testing” here in Anchorage “No Longer a Bowl of Smog” have in some way or another a vested interest, like a business that is tied and relied upon by this ridiculous waste of money. I use the word “ridiculous waste” for the no longer needed aspect of this argument, as it affects both the payee and payer. I got screwed as a consumer. The businesses got screwed as a consumptive. Back a few years ago, when the city’s air monitoring “Geiger” counters went berserk, it wasn’t due to raw vehicle emissions, but this assault was aggravated by “Big Oil” trying to make a fast buck. It had to do with an additive that some how or another was on demand approved by our Congress. See, if we don’t bend over to Ted’s and Don’s wishes, they turn off the “pork” spigot. What it amounted too was a type of cloning science, wherein the “White Coats” had taken worthless crap and made it into valuable crap. Basically, it was made from raw hydrocarbon constituents that would normally be considered hazardous or wasteful, into a value added product. Scientists can stretch the truth, with this thing called a reformer. Sounds like we could use one of those things for the politicians here in Alaska! Anyway, it was a cheap way to make something out of nothing. But when it was pumped from an underground storage tank along with “normal” gasoline at conditions of temperature and pressure more comfortable down-below then the ambient conditions above that the pumping public was subject too - during early morning rush hour - the value added crap vaporized and went into the atmosphere. That program was quickly abandoned, as this stuff was starting to contaminate not only the breathable air, but the Aquifer - “our” ground water fountain of survival. When I say “quickly, it was in effect about 3-years before the water started tasting funny. Alas, the air in and around Anchorage started to see light, except for inclusion of horrendous quantities of dried dog feces! So good quality air had nothing to do with this “Emissions Testing” rip-off. Why? It has long been known that the “stand-still” emission testing required under current rules and regulations to screw the general public, it does not really and truly and honestly test a vehicle’s engine. The only way to truly and seriously test an engine is by subjecting the vehicle to a “dynamometer” test. In such a test, the vehicle can be run through a set of staged test points, from idle to full throttle and also simulate a “Round-About. That cannot be done with the existing “Mickey Mouse” type of test that costs you and I an arm and a leg every other year. Now the “dynamite” dynamometer was considered the only way to go, but abandoned as it was deemed just too costly a piece of equipment and would most likely cost the public about $500 a test whack. And at that time, the only guy certified by the EPA was a senator. How about that! So, it didn’t make sense, as it was known all along that modern day vehicles are not the “culprit” contaminating our air. I already mentioned the doggy do-do! And get this, when that testosterone enabled teenager revs up that bronco busting pickup with side winder type pipes bigger in diameter then the Trans-Alaska-Pipeline, all that noise is followed by a plume of pollution. This is one of those loopholes again, as this cannot and will not be tested by the existing “emission” police. See, engine noise is made quiet by the path of most resistance. If that path is cut short, by either over powering the throttle or using one of those illegal exhaust bypass valves, the pollution control system is overloaded, and thus the engine pukes out nasty pollutants - like BETX. That stands for Benzene, Ethylene, Toluene and Xyzlene. And we had an experiment going on over in Valdez, wherein the residents were subject to an atrocious dosage of this crap, as it was belched constantly from the crude oil storage tanks owned by “Big Oil”. This was back in the 80’s, and all that data was angered useless by the “Big” wreck. So it was worthless. But John Harris is still kicking up a storm, so the air must be OK. Talk about wrecks. Hey, if Dick “Train Wreck” Tranni gets his kid’s way, that blue smoke he talks about is bound to screw up the air quality. So maybe during the festivities wherein the dog pisses and craps all over one’s house due the noise of obliteration, all vehicle traffic should be banned - to offset the pollution effects caused by “Adults Overdosed on Testosterone”. Fireworks I am talking about! See, if not, the city air monitoring “Geiger” counters could once again go berserk. That would warrant air quality health alerts to be issued. Soon we would have assemblymen rushing to the podium with calls to reinstate the “Emissions Test” program, once again. Then we will be stuck with the “dynamo” test, as it is the only test now approved by the EPA and that senator wants to capture the market. And we will get stuck with that $500 dollar test fee. And in efforts to audit this new testing, it will require hiring more DMV experts, so that vehicle registration will also be on the increase. My calculation places it at a 7% increase. Hey, that number rings a bell. Maybe there is a conspiracy in the making. It is what they wanted all along! Take it away for awhile, then hit us up again, bigtime! Blame it on “Global Moaning”, as that seems to be the only way to get something done these days, just listen to “Big Oil”. By the way, since we are talking vehicles and Anchorage drive-bys, take this test. On a multi-lane road, you come across a school bus traveling in the opposite direction. The red lights are flashing. Do you stop? It depends, according to the traffic police. If there is a raised center medium, then stopping is not required. If there is no medium, stopping is required. OK, makes sense, as the medium could be considered a “safety” island. But here in Anchorage, we use the method of least materials for the most amount of money paid contractors. Over time, it seems as though the desired method to resurface roads is to just throw down another layer of “crap” category asphalt. And within a few years time, the surface of the overlaid road is equal to the once upon a time raised medium! So if raised mediums are supposed to act as “safe zones” for little kids crossing the roads, why do we skimp and make it unsafe? Now I am confused, as I don’t know if there is or was a raised medium. Therefore, I stop all of the time and make other drivers resort to “horn” blowing, followed by these looks as though I am stupid. Here’s another one. I bike and I drive. I try to take the opposite side when out and about. That is why you will see me driving around with a helmet. Actually, that is because of the gang warfare and drive-by shootings. Anyway, bikers and drivers need a compromise - especially at intersections. Now this goes only for bike riders and motorists that obey the law to begin with. If you are a bike rider waiting out the right to proceed, relax and take your hands off the handle-bars. This will indicate to drivers that you are not going to dart out unrepentantly. Now when you know the light is about to turn in your favor, then grab the handle bars, and drivers will then know you mean business. Not a law, but a simple “Exhibitionism Test”!

CopyRight 2007 – Dixie Productions/MSK Media/Eagle Rock PressContact: or or

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Inherently Illogical

Inherently Illogical
“Inherently Illogical” is what convicted conspirator Pete Kott’s lawyer called the jury’s verdict. Kott, pack your bags and head to the prison farm. It’s time to pick “spuds”. Look at Tom Anderson, he is admitting his role in allowing this state to become the, “Corrupt Bastards” state. And don’t you get it? He was by far the least damaging of politically appointed crooks. He was the “little fish” petty thief, he’s busted! Why are you wasting the taxpayers’ money trying more lullaby “I’m innocent” bull-crap? We are going to have to feed you and clothe you while in prison, so give it up. With all of your free time while still free before sentencing, sit down and calculate just how much you will cost us in the end? You are a crook, so try not to be a crooked crook, by stalling the process of “time”. I am tired of seeing your ugly mug-shot in the Daily Stool. In fact, why not post a picture of your lawyer, so we can see what he looks like in public. I like avoiding the diseased! You know what, you crooked corrupt bastards should have known all along that if you make trouble, this state doesn’t have the expertise to bail you free. See, take U.S. Senator Ted for instance. He is in D.C., so he has available to him topnotch defense attorneys, like Brendan Sullivan. That’s the guy who came on board to defend U.S.M.C. Colonel Oliver North, during Ronald Reagan’s Iran Contra fiasco. That is when we armed Iran. But Sullivan and his gang, their expertise is “presidential” pardon applications, so even if you could afford to waste the likes of a Ted Stevens’ “War Chest” - now misappropriated as a “Defense Fund” - your day in court is a done deal. A “presidential” pardon is well, forget it in your case. The jury spoke. The gavel fell, and soon the paddle will arose your ass hairs. And get this about Vic Kohring. His defense team wanted the upcoming trial moved out of Alaska, to Seattle. For those outsiders that may be reading this, Alaska was once upon a time called the “Last Frontier”. Crooks, in the disguise of “Frontiersmen” arrived on the scene and turned it into the “Corrupt Bastards” state. They even named a club in their honor, with caps and coats and goon gowns that advertised, CBC - a.k.a. “Corrupt Bastards Club”. They went so blind-sided with corruption and oil company type “Deliverance”, it backfired on them. So now we have at last count the following. A sitting U.S. Senator whose house was raided by the FBI and IRS. A sitting U.S. Congressmen that is under all kinds of ethics violations and to date has retained legal advice at the cost of $250,000 dollars. A sitting U.S. Senator that dabbles in real-estate instead of real issues. And at least 5-state elected politicians under FBI surveillance and indictments waiting in the wings. So Elise, don’t try to compare this state of affairs with that of New Jersey. So what, the mayor there went on a joy ride for a few days. It could have been caused by traffic. And where has Ben been? And remember one thing of importance that makes Alaska above and beyond all other states in the category of corruption. “Big Oil” is behind it all! Anyway, with Kohring’s attempt to forfeit Alaska down the drain for Seattle, it was based on the fair trial doctrine. Didn’t he represent the people of Alaska at one time in his career? Can’t we now represent him, as jurors? Anyhow, his defense lawyers seem to want a place wherein only “imbeciles” are allowed as part of the jury pool. Maybe that is why Ben is holding out, trying to exhaust the pool beyond “imbeciles”. Doesn’t that mean it would then be onto “politicians”? Anyway, that imbecile label means individuals that have no idea what is going on around them. We learn from day one, to be observant. And this is the age of “1st Amendment” at your doorstep, on your I-Pod, displayed on every billboard and soon to be carried by robotic moths. The moths are designed to fly in the air into your ear and whisper things of importance – like whom to vote for. So one cannot help to not know what is going on! Maybe we need to hurry along our space program, so aliens can be included in the “pool”. Now according to the judge, “To put it bluntly, a surprising number of prospective jurors are just not interested in, and do not follow, local news…Many don’t even read local newspapers. Many do not watch the local news on television.” The bottom line, when you live in Alaska - especially here in the “big city” of Anchorage - you are more aware of your surroundings and become very accustomed to who may be a crook. Why, just look at the latest crime statistics. This state is way above the national average for all types of crimes against fellow men and women. Is this America? If I were a tourist, I would cancel that reservation! Seems like we have vacated that “State of the Union” label and dropped back to “Territorial” status. Maybe we should. So one doesn’t have to read or watch out to what is going on everywhere else, and we can pay attention to just “us” and our own welfare well-being. Bottom-line, this “corruption disease” is all around us. Of course it can’t be a fair trail for the crooks, but they did it to themselves and now they cry wolf. I wish Wayne was still operating the “Hillside” vigilante, maybe it could have grown big and popular enough to “police” our representatives. Territorial status sounds better all the time! Wow, think about it. We then could also police “Big Oil” and rape upon our resources would be a thing of the past. And “Big Oil” would then not be able to ever again plant that “seed” of corruption that sorry enough infiltrated our very own system of governance. We paid for it then, we pay for it now. And everybody is still crying “Ben”!
CopyRight 2007 – Dixie Productions/MSK Media/Eagle Rock PressContact: or or


So Anchorage John Law is about to go “pro-active”, during the upcoming special one-day event to recognize the “Handicapped”. October 17th is reserved as “Disability Mentor Day”. Thus beware, those of you who insist on parking in a “Handicap” zone, reserved for those who need a helping hand when out shopping. Remember, it doesn’t mean “handi” to support your lazy ass habits. So violators will be hanged! I don’t get it with the way people abuse little things, like preferential parking. See, it seems as though one individual can get a “blue pass” and then the entire family takes advantage of it. How many times have you witnessed this, where some young teenager drives up and grabs the easy spot, and there is no apparent human ailment whatsoever! And what qualifies one to be considered “handicapped”? It looks as though the “obesity” label is winning out. Now think about it. If an obese person gets a blue token, and other family members take advantage of it, it may lead to more obesity – the laziness syndrome. Maybe it is evolving into a hereditary thing. This earth is already cornucopia stressed, so one thing we don’t need is an “obesity” pandemic. But when our senators and congressmen refuse to take matters of crap nutrition into consideration targeting the fast food industry, we are doomed and Soylent Green is becoming a reality each and every day. Hey, talk about pro-active, I am glad to see that Tom Anderson finally became active and admitted he was a professional crook, in efforts to reduce his sentencing. That bothers me. See, all throughout the trial, even before his day in court, when we were bombarded with requests for donations from the “Tom Anderson Defense Fund”, he swore up and down that he was innocent. It cost the American taxpayers a whole bunch of money to investigate his crimes. And when the Federal police investigate a politician for crimes against constituents – similar to crimes against humanity – the crime stoppers must do everything miraculously clean, or else it looks as though “Big Brother” is on some sort of rampart revenge to “kill the messenger” and the jury goes sympathetic. So the Fed.’s did a wonderful job this time around. Do you know what kind of permission it takes for the FBI and the IRS to raid a sitting senator’s residence? Just ask Ted Stevens. Hey if a lawbreaking lawmaker doesn’t know, then it must be the president himself. Right on! Now Anderson’s cries of innocence along with a trial that kept a bunch of public servants employed, it cost the Treasury an arm and a leg. He should have just admitted guilt in the first place, it would have cost the taxpayers less waste. In fact, he should have known better in the first place, and it would have cost us a whole lot less. It would have meant more money to be wasted on “pork”. Wouldn’t it be nice to get a rebate from Uncle Sam? Ted is always giving away rebates, to his friends in the form of a “grant”. Now Anderson should be required to reimburse the government for the investigation through trial through sentencing. Likewise, Anderson should have to pay his own way in prison. Hey, the family ties with his wife - state senator Lesil McGuire and her dad, a.k.a. racehorse owner along with Bill Allen and Ted Stevens - these relationships should also be drawn into the equation in efforts to help pay for his lodging. That is my pro-active stance on political corruption. You play you pay with time and pay with loot. Double dipping, yes indeed. Oh, and according this criminal’s attorney, Tom can no longer apply for a PFD. Poor baby! And cry me a river, he can’t vote. Now Mr. Harris - house speaker out loud - he must have been infected with the Valdez crud. “Tom was a good legislator…He had the best interest of Alaskans on his moral and ethical compass.” He’s a felon! And maybe his compass wasn’t pointing true north, but due corruption. And it seems that the Anchorage Water and Wastewater department finally went pro-active. Just last spring this outfit installed a fire hydrant right smack in the middle of a guy’s driveway on Meadow Street. It is gone now, moved over a few feet, where it should have been placed in the first place. Can you imagine getting a work order from your boss in the morning that calls for installing a fire hydrant in a weird place, and not question it? Must be a union job. Now I wouldn’t question such if I were a fence guy and tasked to put a prison like fence around a double-deck house in Girdwood. Talk about pro-active, have you taken a ride by Al’s on Old SeaWeed, the flying circus bar. He has this Alaska Railroad car up on stilts. I guess in efforts to mimic the Bill “Nose Bleed” Sheffield Memorial Train Depot, right across from the U.S.S. Ted Stevens pirate ship, a.k.a. International Airport. The depot has to be a memorial, as it is dead. And Al seems to be having a little trouble getting a permit for patrons to use his very own depot. I guess Bill doesn’t like the competition. So Al installed this humongous model like choo-choo train that is taking off, like a whirly bird. Maybe to mimic the Kodiak Launch Facility, wherein no rockets are allowed - but it remains a bonafide launch facility. Does it really require over a million dollars a year just to maintain that waste of an infrastructure in the “ready” mood mode? Oh, I have pro-activated somebody’s anger without management. So I stand corrected as the KLF did indeed shoot off a rocket this year. So chalk that up as a miracle, because for the past 5 or so years that this atrocity has soaked money away – again from the U.S. Treasury – it can account for maybe 3 successful rocket liftoffs. If this is any indication of pro-active investment success, Mission Control, we have a problem! Tom, enjoy your stay!

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