Books & Writings by SPam McGee

Alaska Short Stack Stories, Series I, II, & III ~ Alaska's Deadliest Sin-Drill Baby Drill ~ Alaskan Company Man ~ Eklutna Lake Worrier ~ From the Fifth Floor ~ Hannah Cove ~ My Journey to Landes House ~ Poemetrics ~ Quinn the "Tanik" Eskimo ~ S.O.S. from Beaver Lake ~ The Teachings of the Swamp Fox ~ Trans-Alaska-Pipeline Funny Stories ~ Spirit Dog & the Ghost Wind


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~ This Machine KILLS Fascists ~
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"This Land Is Your Land"

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Fools’ Ball

Dam it, is Romney already at it - again? Just because he is the GOP “jerk without honor” shooting for the U.S. presidency, does that give him the right to trample on the decency of democracy? Seems so, with respect to sending jobs away to the buddy system foreign allegiance by continuing to practice Bain style corporate corruption resulting in undermining my American hero – the salt of this earth working class. Look, the NFL is now playing “futtydudball” in the UK. Was my nation invaded? Did we lose the battle and relent to brokering away our heritage? Have we lost what was once ours, upon that “stuff” that made us so great a nation strong even with individual indifferences, like football? See, when even a single game is flown away from American soil, it means an economic lose in the $millions$ for the local merchants, upon an economy that is struggling by one day at a time in efforts to cure the Bush doctrine nightmare – the fallout from a president that was dumber then a cowpie. Imagine, empty parking lots at the stadium! And take away that Sunday religious ceremony known as the tailgate, it’s fighting words for many with a conscious. Hey, it’s happening at a stadium near you - this send it abroad attack by profit mongers bent on a mandate that wealth rules and “who cares about America”! Which brings it up as a candidate of concern, as this is truly un-Constitutional. Think about it, American football in another man’s kingdom! Pinch me, please. If this is true, where’s the lobotomy clinic as I can only take so much abuse? My fellowman, where? For sure, send away the OEM manufacturing jobs to countries that have no labor laws as such meaningless employment amounts to nothing more than a carpel syndrome workers’ compensation handout scam, but sending football abroad? When one takes into account that even though two skirmishing professional athletic teams amounts to only a handful of players on the sod, the behind the scenes activities for success are paramount and orchestrated by a gigantic undertaking. So for the 2-hours wherein the game is played out and most likely televised, how about over 2500-man hours erased away, by playing football away from “Home”. It stinks. It stinks like a Don Young rabid skunk – meaning a Nancy Pelosi stink bomb. Now there are times when it is important to put up the armor to condemn this sort of outrage – football in another’s homeland. Where’s the outrage upon the maggot traitors that have perpetrated this idea? I am sure the Trump is behind it! And if the NFL players are behind this mutiny, then they have been infected by the Vic disease. Instead of killing dogs, killing America. And just the fact that it occurred on Obama’s watch, I am burning my voter registration card. This coup upon America, with football being broadcast from abroad, it is like burning the American flag. That is exactly what I envisioned every-time the camera crew focused in on the NFL insignia at the 50-yard line surrounded by British turf, an American flag ablaze. Is this how the Brits finally get back at us, with our win at “Independence”? And what do you mean we can just watch the damn game on Demand Payment TV, as that is just another lame response - the sick and tired kind we get from the representation. This is America, or is it not? If Congress is so engaged in baseball in efforts to spend a whole lot of time and endless effort for one and only one reason, at keeping Pete Rose away from what is rightfully his to begin with, that Hall of Fame indoctrination, how come this outsourcing of football is going ahead without any Congressional interference? Forgot, Congress is AWOL and the henhouse, well… But I find watching a New England “PATRIOT’s” game from abroad offensive, downright blasphemy in action. And spotted Dick blokes don’t like American football! That is a fact proud enough upon itself that makes an American sport like football sent abroad a crying shame crime. When I worked for a company associated with the British royalty, I had the privilege of working with individuals that laughed at football as a “tough” sport, in comparison to a Lincolnshire Saturday night date and bar brawling routine - it was tame with respect to that British pastime. Honestly, to win a man’s heart, a potential wife must endure neighborhood pub brawling, and when teeth get knocked out, that turns the male Brits on! Surely with that kind of respect and dedication, no way in hell would this country steal away their “football”.  But now we see an American ideal persecuted upon, for the almighty buck. Look, football is know where near the caliper required to that associated with American basketball, American baseball or American hockey. Today, football appears to be just a bunch of overweight wannabe “refrigerators” that act as if the Berlin wall is still in vogue. Overweight is vogue, that is why the “tailgate” will one day become another input into the equation of obesity. It is not a sport in my book, this American “football”. Regardless, it isn’t something this country should be throwing away to another rival – the British are coming! And we all know it has nothing to do with loyalty, as royalty in wealth has turned the tides once again against us. And I am tired of the same old negative response, that there is nothing we can do but join them, what a pathetic loyalty this has with respect to AMERICA. Especially when push comes to shove, don’t tread on me, we remember the words of John F. Kennedy. If you are lost with those words of advice a genuine American, as was John, then you are an American adult left behind. So I decided to write the queen bee, to see if she realized what was going down. Here it is:
Her Majesty d’Queen 
Some time ago while visiting England for work, especially with time out to enjoy your “homeland’s” beautiful countryside, I was truly awe struck by the respect that swans along the waterways hold your servants, only to be informed that the “swans” are rightfully protected - by Her Majesty d’Queen. In America, we have over time taken protective attention upon things of importance, like Football. Kind of like is afforded your swans and we deserve the same respect with this football. So please, dear Queen Elizabeth II, please see to it respect and offer protection this American icon by banning now and forever the National Football League from disgracing your nation and my nation by disallowing your turf to become part of this sport. The fact that the investors believe the football league should expand, it doesn’t make sense economically speaking, when at the same time this maneuver is hurting us back here in America. Football games that are scheduled to commence in your country, well it is like outsourcing jobs, as the local economy suffers when even a single game is taken away to foreign soil, especially to another country like yours. It is with this correspondence that I ask you respectfully to place a ban on football, professional football that involves American interest. Like the swans, forever has it held something of respect, with American football, we deserve the same respect. So please, take this request seriously and place a ban on any furtherance this sport on your homeland by American interests.  Respectfully, S. Pam Magee.
PS. While in UK during 2006, I wrote this poem for your swans:
          ~ The Pool ~  
This pool is never to be still,even upon the calm,of a midsummer’s night dream.Never tiring from invasion,even when seaside safe.
As other entities rule tranquility.Winged intruders sound the warning.May be by whistle,
May be by trumpet.
A novice’s mistake, not identity theft.
As the mute is silent not!
The Swans of Brayford Pool!

 So majestic on their own,in the Creator’s domain.What wand proclaims such magic?Some say a life tragic.But rest assured, if indeed the greatest of the white birds must fly,T’is a flight of might,Maybe to give sight,As such freedom is right.
The Swans of Brayford Pool!

 Through gallant stridesLeaps give sound.Walking on water is not out of bounds.So much grace will astound.So much beauty abounds.
The Majestic Swans of Brayford Pool.

 Copyright 2006 MSK/ERP

Saturday, October 27, 2012

SLAPP Notice

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Thursday, October 25, 2012

BIG Announcement

Ha, Ha, He, He! Donald Oswald Trump and the putrid “birther” movement can  fade away, OBAMA voted today!!!!!!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Ann Romney

Appears "Ann of Gold Stables" is out on the trail!

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Biden vs. Pinocchio

Considering a picture is worth a thousand words, here is my best take on the debate between Joe Biden and Pinocchio (the nose that keeps on growing):

And here is the Romney/Pinocchio theme song, courtesy of Neil Young:

"Cortez The Killer"

He came dancing across the water
With his galleons and guns
Looking for the new world
In that palace in the sun.

On the shore lay Montezuma
With his coca leaves and pearls
In his halls he often wondered
With the secrets of the worlds.

And his subjects
gathered 'round him
Like the leaves around a tree
In their clothes of many colors
For the angry gods to see.

And the women all were beautiful
And the men stood
straight and strong
They offered life in sacrifice
So that others could go on.

Hate was just a legend
And war was never known
The people worked together
And they lifted many stones.

They carried them
to the flatlands
And they died along the way
But they built up
with their bare hands
What we still can't do today.

And I know she's living there
And she loves me to this day
I still can't remember when
Or how I lost my way.

He came dancing across the water
Cortez, Cortez
What a killer.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Obama Debates Scrooge

I am glad that the entire MSNBC crew has embraced ObamaCare and the day-after pill affords them much needed medication. I just saw a bus leaving the NBC headquarters, looked like one of those buses used in the prison system wherein some must be restrained, On board was Chris Matthews, Todd Palin, Ed Schultz, Rachel and  those youngsters still on the "Spin Cycle” – including the “Naughty Librarian”. Now I am sure that bus is headed to medication central, as the heat of disgust following the debates wherein the MSNBC crew was out for blood – well they showed their true behavior with “Beltway” road rage when Obama didn’t perform to their desires. The entire crew went on a conniption fit following the 1st 2012 Presidential debates. Here is my score card take on this all important non-sport event. Obama had nothing to lose, as the polls continue to make him a favorite – so why risk it. With Scrooge, well he had everything to lose. So here is what I take away from the 1st debate. Obama will remain the same but names changed to protect the idiots – I mean innocent! Scrooge has a number of things to bring to the table and still na├»ve enough that he believes “bipartisan” containment is attainable! First and foremost Scrooge will:
1)      Re-instate “Debtors’ Prison”,
2)      Bake sales in “voucher” schools to disallow “Blue” M&M’s in cookies(a Mrs. Scrooge demand).
3)      Eliminate the “Tanning Booth Tax” and transfer that tax upon "Liberal" talk shows.
4)     Amnesty program for the 47%, get rich by 2013 or else pay a fine, like with ObamaCare.
5)     Extend IRS “Amnesty Program” for the rich with “off-shore” havens.
6)     Deport Chris Matthews and Ed Schultz as an example to future trust fund babies.
7)     Whitehouse to be raised, due the fact that Ann of Gold Stables believes past tenants may have left behind bed bugs.
8)     Hang “Big Bird” then do away with PBS

Monday, October 1, 2012


Dear Patty Sullivan/M.V. Susitna PR Person;

Ha, Ha, Ha. Just read the press release from Jan. 30, 2008: “Ridership, no problem for Susitna ferry”. What was even more hilarious, “Unlike most public ferry systems, the Susitna won’t require a subsidy.” IT”S GROUNDED! Honestly, this waste will go down as the “biggest ever waste” of U.S. Taxpayers’ loot, topping the Healy “Clean Coal” Plant, so at least you have something of a legacy future generations can have a laugh over. But here is way to get rid of the waste and kill two birds with one stone. Sail it over to Kodiak Island, call it the maiden voyage and invite the dignitaries, like MoanaLisa MurCowpie, Sean and others that enjoy good champagne. Attach the hull to the Kodiak Launch Facility tower along with a few solid-propellant booster rockets, surplus from the space shuttle program, then with “T-minus” and counting, blast both off into space, as junk! Just think, it would make for a great fireworks display.


Wow, appears the blogcasting of the CRISCO holiday recipe may have been not so good an idea!

"Police arrested a man found naked and covered in CRSICO early Monday in the downtown area. Officers responded to the call of a naked man at 3:27 a.m. on the 3rd Avenue, where they found him carrying a pair of shorts. Police said the man told officers he had taken off his shorts because they were too big and would not stay on. “He had lathered himself up in Crisco. He was covered in grease, and was holding the can under his arm. He said he was looking for a place to party,” Prosecutors have charged Mr. Crisco with a Class 3 Felony under state law that carries a prison sentence of two to five years. CRISO guy was being held Tuesday night in jail on $40,000 bond."

Great Holiday Recipe

Condensed Milk(1 can)
Instant Potato Flakes(1 cup)
White Sugar(2 cups)
CRISCO Shortening(2 cups)

Mix instant potato flakes with enough condensed milk to form a creamy paste. Add shortening and sugar to form an even creamery paste, add berries. More sugar to sweeten if berries tart. Let Cool. Mangia!