Books & Writings by SPam McGee

Alaska Short Stack Stories, Series I, II, & III ~ Alaska's Deadliest Sin-Drill Baby Drill ~ Alaskan Company Man ~ Eklutna Lake Worrier ~ From the Fifth Floor ~ Hannah Cove ~ My Journey to Landes House ~ Poemetrics ~ Quinn the "Tanik" Eskimo ~ S.O.S. from Beaver Lake ~ The Teachings of the Swamp Fox ~ Trans-Alaska-Pipeline Funny Stories ~ Spirit Dog & the Ghost Wind


Stories All About Alaska and More...
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~ This Machine KILLS Fascists ~

Thursday, December 14, 2017


 – Thursday December 14, 2017

According to officials from Kaspersky Lab, the Alabama Senate race saw 22819 votes that went to a write-in candidate named “SASSY”. The Roy Moore campaign chaircursing agent, a Mr. Orange Snatch, has sent a recount request to the State Board of Elections asking not only for a recount, but trying to convince the majority Conservative Board that those “SASSY” votes belong to Ol’ Roy. That would then give the “Bigot Party” an edge up and it could reverse things for Mr. Jones’ lovely daughter, in favor of Roy-Boy-Toy “Everybody Owns A JEW” Moore. See, in Alabama there exists some strange laws, sometimes called the “Blue Hound Ball Sucking”, unanimously passed when Deliverance was popular. Accordingly, opined from those familiar with Gomer Conway’s back-woods pile defecation following the voter defection for a horse instead of a “Pervert”, the fact that a husband & wife team can run for any office and if the combined votes find a majority, they win and can share duties. So, the problem that Roy faces is the fact that “SASSY” is the “perverted” judges horse, not his wife. But in Alabama, it is man then horse before wife. The reason the wife gets the horse crap rake as a wedding gift, duty calls. This is a convincing argument and the reason that Roy refuses to concede the election, hoping for a late inning erection from LASSIE. This election could be turned around, stay tuned. Even though “bestiality” is frowned upon, it is acceptable for “old grey mares” in “Bama” – the land of moor pedophiles and by judging, a zoophile philosophy.
According to the House & Senate combined COVFEFE Castration Complex “Tax Reform”, the House gets its “Tic” and the Senate its “Tac”, so all registered republicans will receive a bonus, a package of Tic-Tac as a Christmas gift – proof tested by a MORON. Remember, this miracle gem promises a “Whoah. Yes. Whoah. Look at you. You are a pussy. Maybe it's a different one. Yeah that's her with the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know I'm automatically attracted to beautiful... I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything. What is not clear, was the proof test by the MORON anally or orally administered over No Coke…Pepsi douche while watching the remake of, Deliverance. BPTN tested the Moron’s “tweets” through a Phineas J. Whoopee text-to-audio filter and every damn presidential outburst sings out: “Squeal Like a Pig”.
A massive high-pressure atmospheric zone is consuming ¾ of the United States. It is causing an un-heard of surprise, a negative Dew Point. Look, about 1 in a million understand by definition a normal “positive” dew point, so this “negative” is time consuming. Which means the surrounding air will start to deprive our skin of moisture. Yes, being negative and trying to assume stability, it will start to suck us dry, just like the GOP “Tic-Tac Tax Reform” about to anal rape the middle-class. This sucking, it will lead to massive dandruff and dry skin conditions and being an Act-of-God, not covered by the “Reform” and our streets will soon be covered with, well dead skin akin to a snow fall. And then it will become a feeding frenzy for ants, and the bugs will take over.
From the Grope Underground
COVFEFE: Tillerson Approval “UP”

(Gomer Kellyanne Conway, Congressional Pervert Poster Boy from Alabama)

END – Edition 2-R1

Wednesday, December 13, 2017


 – Wednesday December 13, 2017

“Woke up, fell out of bed
Dragged a comb across my head
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup
And somebody spoke and I went into a…


Ding Dong the Hate is Dead…The Roy Moore and Donald John Trump PERVERT Tag Team failed to score a victory in Alabama’s Senate race. It was not supposed to be such a close call race, wherein a Democrat won by challenging a Rikishi Fatu Stinkface platform. Trump backed this platform! What was forecast as an easy victory for Moore went whacky, as many of Moore’s supporters played out their lemming like instincts, and instead of casting a vote for Moore, followed instructions from another prominent Republican Senator by exercising a write-in because that would prevent any Russian interference. Somebody named Sassy received many of Moore’s votes and now the Moore campaign is calling for a recount and trying to secure those “Sassy” votes in the GOP count.



Donald John Trump must be getting desperate, he has applied for the following job. Qualifications: A president with a record of calling a U.S. Senator a whore, and unfit to clean toilets in Obama's presidential library or to shine George W. Bush's shoes.

From the Grope Underground
COVFEFE: No Coke, Pepsi!

END-Edition 1-R1

Achilles Heel Spurs

Over at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology along Killian Court, is wherein the “Attics of the Pavillions” finds a very interesting historical journal of “Greatness”, amongst human-kindness of the past dedicated to a cause above and beyond. From great minds the likes of Newton to great minds the likes of Gay Lussac to great minds the likes of Daguerre - it’s a long list of accomplishments! When I visit Boston, there is always a break between Sam Adam’s dedication time and taking a walking tall over the Longfellow for a refresher this “Greatness” still today helping destiny’s child find a future. OK, I hang out at Bukowski’s high & dive “Dead Author’s Club” and sure it would be easier to foot it over the “Wrongfellow Bridge” instead. But my therapist Sean Maguire hangs out at the “Commons”, so I detour the easy street and stop by for some words of advice with respect to my “swan fetish”. OK, that bridge is also known as the “Harvard Detour”, but for many of us the “Wrong” finds a better fit substitute the way Henry Murray fooled around with the “Lawful’s” young mind. Who, what, when and why? Ted Kaczynski, subjected basket-case to the CIA MK-Ultra-White experiments at age 16 while a student at Timothy Leary’s “psilocybin” retreat and see what that produced. One of the world’s greatest mathematical minds tortured to become an “Enemy of the People”. Ted would have made a name for himself befit for the “Attic” instead of the so-so-name famed “Unabomber”. Sad that this “Boundary Theory” wizard’s mind is rotting away along Highway 66 plus 1. Now, there has not been a new name added to that MIT memorial of “Greats” for some time by now, so is it due for a facelift? And the winning mind is…it would take the act of the almighty to see the jack hammers and sand blasting preparing the “Attic” for a new name. But Achilles Heel Spurs, Donald John Trump may turn out to be this nation’s, well it is hard to use the word “Greatest” or “Best” or for that matter the “Best of the Best”, but he may gain favor to be included in the “Attic’s” list of great men and women. I’m serious, especially if he hangs on to the “Big Phony tit News” as a vice until his “Apprenticeship” is complete. See, “Access Hollywood” Donald became MORON-in-Thief due the simple fact the Cliton’s ruined the democratic party. And with the repudiated other side of the isle injured while Dubbya went hog-wild groping PoundMeToo upon Merkel, Democracy went limping along and it looked pretty bleak for the future. Not now, NOT a typo with the “CLIT”, it gets the point across. Hillary was the worse-case scenario pick to run for the 45th following the Obama legacy, and today many of US are radicalized as independents because we have reason to believe, proof she hijacked the party! She gave not a rat’s ass about anything as “I’m the only one that matters” was her pride and joy today stolen away by the MORON, that me-me-me-only-me matters selfish fetish shackles. And this bull-crap about torturing those of US with Patriotic stamina that said NAY Hillary, well I am so far enjoying what is going on? For the sane reason that the insane MORON is well ahead of schedule to ruin the “Red Faced” opposition, as the GOP is “Toast”. Both parties will go down in history as “Perverted”! The bailout has already begun, the Elephant Turd and the Donkey’s Ass parties are no longer representative of our standing as a sovereign nation. “We the People” once united have been shat upon from the left and eunuchizd by the right, and that has “Divided” US! And when it is all said and done, there will exist a new spirited “Independence” that will take back ownership of our destiny. Right now, it is totally out of control from sea to shining sea. That “Divide” to conquer is testament that there is today before our very own voter turn-me-off eyes and ears, a warning shot “One Iron” full swing political party affiliation upheaval revolution. Was it planned? If so, what faction is behind this charge of the Get-it-Right Brigade? As I feel the need to shake a hand and offer up thanks, as this re-alignment Revolution was way overdue. Look, we have the best espionage and eavesdropping talents Patriotism can enable. Off course the “harse” knew what was going down by “allowing” Putin’s Russia whores to interfere with that 2016 hackathon election. That interference was necessary to challenge Hillary’s momentum and at the same time engage that foreign disgrace into the election when it counted most, after Trump was named the candidate. For the sole reason that this nation was already on the divide, as for years the “Do Nothing Congress” had been derelict in upholding the U.S. Constitution “By the People and For the People” because of selfish handovers with takeovers by the “Lobby”. The latter dedicated not to “Life, Liberty and the pursuit to Happiness” by hoarding it all for a few. When the 1% WAR was made official by Mitt Romney back during the 2012 election, that was when Democracy’s “secret weapon” went ignited. It is not a plan hatched out in some board room, it is pure unadulterated American Democracy at work without human contributions or interaction, as if there were a means to interfere it would have already been acknowledged and stopped in its tracks - it is a genuine self-inflicted course correction. Like nature at work alongside our wasted debates over our destructive ways and means, nature is already on a correction course just like our Democracy is finding a new soul mate. Right now that honor belongs to Trump, but only for the time required to fix things the way Democracy was designed by our Founding Fathers. Trump isn’t fixing it, just getting in the way so the fix can do its thing. Good riddance is my sentiment, out with the whores in with the new forward looking political system that caters to all our needs, with bipartisan efforts – we can no longer exist with such a divide between our “Brothers and Sisters” all walks of life the same damn commitment. This movement be forevermore once again our “middle-class salt of the earth” destiny, wherein equality is the recipe for success which breeds our survival. We were so close to doom, so this correction course with the MORON at the helm, in time we may thank him for what is still out with the jury to decide upon. Look, this nation had but a few good men sitting in that “Oval Office”. Obama, Carter, Reagan and H.W. Bush. But that only covers 24-years the last 40, not too bad I guess. So, what we see happening right today the “Awful Office” is now under attack, it will never be the same as the “Times they are a-changin” for Democracy’s sake. So, sit back and let it work the way it was so designed when our “Tranquility” was infiltrated by Traitors and interrupted by “Perverts”. WTF is that noise? It’s Mcguire yelling out “It’s not your fault”, like a broken record. Time for another beer, this time 21 Amendment “Black & White” and a salute to OUR DEMOCRACY, that which will prevail and sink the wealth of the rich bastards, those that thought they could take us hostage. Think again assholes as “My Country ‘Tis of Thee” is seeing a makeover and…OK, about the only legacy that the MORON will be remembered upon by future generations is “The president who’d all but call a senator a whore is unfit to clean toilets in Obama’s presidential library or to shine George W. Bush’s shoes.” And maybe when Democracy is once again seated and secured as it was so designed, the 1st Act of the New Congress will be a decree that renames the “Crapper” the “TRUMP”!

Tuesday, December 12, 2017


Look, I give Donald John Trump credit for standing behind the “Voice of Bigotry” of the Roy Moore-ism movement, like a bowel movement it is. See, Melanomia has no friends in Washington, and after a year she is depressed. So, when Roy moves his confederacy to the “Bannon Branded Beltway” and drags along his wife behind Mr. Ed with her “poop patrol rake”, finally Mel will have a friend. When Kayla “I Own a JEW” Moore takes up residence in the Senate stables, now all those delayed 1St Lady “House Warming” parties will commence. “Boudoir Soiree”, reservations for 2! Is that a victory speech I hear calling out from down yonder….

Oxford Town, Oxford Town
Everybody's got their heads bowed down
The sun don't shine above the ground
Ain't a-goin' down to Oxford Town

He went down to Oxford Town
Guns and clubs followed him down
All because his face was brown
Better get away from Oxford Town

Oxford Town around the bend
Come to the door, he couldn't get in
All because of the color of his skin
What do you think about that, my friend?

Me and my gal, my gal's son
We got met with a tear gas bomb
I don't even know why we come
Goin' back where we come from

Oxford Town in the afternoon
Everybody singin' a sorrowful tune
Two men died 'neath the Mississippi moon
Somebody better investigate soon

Songwriters: Bob Dylan
Oxford Town lyrics © Bob Dylan Music Co.

PoundMeToo - Day 325

Monday, December 11, 2017

Robert Mueller’s Day Off

Glory Bejesus Hallelujah, the government shutdown was postponed for another 2-weeks! Because…bum roll please - “unfunded mandate” unmarked freshly minted genuine $100-dollar bills from the Congressional Accountability “Pervert Slush Fund” went repurposed to keep the lights on at the U.S. Treasury. “Unfunded Mandate”? It means an elected Congress approved appropriation that which finds a source of Taxpayer generated income confiscated forever, even if a shutdown occurs it is replenished – it’s perpetual “money” motion science. Just like the salary increases for members of Congress. See, when Congress adjourns after a month’s long Christmas vacation, the 1st roll call used to be the “pay raise” for their salary, it was put up for a vote. If a raise was justified based on “cost-of-living” the vote was usually an overwhelming “YEAMAN”! If the economy was sad and American’s were feeling the pain and suffering of having to get by with moldy stale bread, any pay increase was usually postponed. That is when those so elected tried to be like US. But somewhere along the way the crowded schedule for rule-making, or “Lobby” stool pigeoning, it allowed for that “pay raise” vote to be automatic at the fall of the gavel “Congress In Session – But Out To Lunch.” An automatic “pay raise”? Wow, that seems Un-American. Too bad our elected officials were not like the rest of US – AT WILL! See, I must produce to keep my job and be above “meets expectations” to see any bonus money. Realize that the payments “We the Taxpayers” dish out for very little in return rewards the salary we pay Congress, well the ends do not justify the means. In retrospect, back in 1975 Congress realized a salary of $45000, which is today’s “Average Wage Earned” income across the board. Hoodwinked, as Congress was way ahead of the income curve and could have postponed any increases for about 45-years. But somewhere along the way that increase hit “TILT” of scale and increased 287%, by their own accord that salary ballooned with an additional $130000 bucks of our hard-earned loot confiscated then regurgitated. OK, Congress has not enjoyed a salary raise since 2009, as that is when the “Do Nothing Congress” Bozo Bus circus came to town. OK, when the auditors went back in time there was acknowledged a calculation error along the way, so it is catch-up time – excuses, excuses. Realize also from 1789 through 1825, members of Congress “volunteered” service to country and paid an 8$ per-day per-diem – enough for a Sam Adams, a cheese-burger and a bunk. What a concept, “Look what’s happening out in the streets ~ Got a Revolution ~ Well, we are Volunteers of America, Volunteers of America”! OK, I stand corrected one last time as it was 2009 when the “Congressional Pervert Fund” started to require replenishing, so instead of a pay raise shore up the “Slush Fund” just in case…Hey, with a “Do Nothing Congress” as part of Newt Gingrich’s “Contact Syphilis for America”, spare time allows for a whole lot of nookie negotiating behind closed doors. But that “Pervert Slush Fund” is today like the Eunuchizer wabbit, refills are free and on auto-pilot for the “Please Do Something Congress”! When I ask for "leadership" performance, I don’t mean sexual abuse! But with some chump-change keeping the government up and running for a time before a time-out, with the lights on full bright that makes it easier for the Wall Street crooks to raid the henhouse. And it appears the combination to the “Great Safe” is part of the “Tax Reform” soon to be signed into effect by the MORON. That word “REFORM”, it scares me, but kind of sums it up this “Taxation Reform for Over-Achieving Cheaters 101”. See, in the oil & gas sector a “Reformer” is a chemical process that can take “crap” and disguise it as motor fuel. Yes, take low-octane(that which defines the middle-class) and renegotiate the worth and you end up with high-octane(that which defines the wealthy). See, it works by dismantling through annihilation the low-grade atoms’ peaceful right to be left alone as nature intended, taking the good stuff through castration and rejecting the “left”-overs as, basically burned in “gas chamber like hot ovens” – HEIL ANNIHILATE! Then the confiscated “good stuff” is distributed to blend with – well my car can run on the cheap-thrills whereas that “Oh Lord won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz” needs the good stuff to rock’n roll, especially if a get-away heist from the Treasury or the Russians getting out of Dodge fast with a Mueller-Tail hounding. It is like an added value tax this reforming process. OK, if that science lesson was too difficult and stealing from Paul to benefit Peter doesn’t ring a bell of concern, then it is like stuffing 1-poundMeToo of the Moron’s intelligence in a 10-poundMeToo condom – which means a whole lot of hot air space for premature ejaculations by the circle jerks. His pussy posse. Sorry the “Reform” made me confused as the Moron doesn’t have 1-ounce of intelligence. I will get back to you on this science after conferring with Phineas J. Whoopee my guidance counselor. Yes, I am still in detention, close to 55-years! But on another subject of minority interest, how much has the FBI condemned “Trump Tower and Putin Dildo in Cahoots” caper cost US already? It is also called the COVFEFE CASTRATION COMPLEX, in FBI code. And has any single guilty individual seen the likes of an 8x8 with bars and a toilet pit without a sunscreen? No, and don’t hold your breath. Look, the entire investigation would have and should have been over with by now. There was NO smoking wabbit, maybe it got away! It was just an exercise in pathetic preferential treatment sadistic abuse upon Democracy by the filthy rich kids of “Access Hollywood” perverts. Perverts, like everywhere from the top down all the way down the line – thought this ended with Woody Allen? Like it’s in Vogue to be a “Pervert”! So why is it we have yet to see “Robert Mueller’s Day Off” and continue to see an ongoing probe wherein the heat has been turned up by the J. Edgar Hoover G-Men? See, the Tower MORON attacked the FBI and wherein Phase II - the Putin Dildo evidence – it was but a non-necessity this investigation, even with the firing of James Comey. Until that shot across the bow from Mar-a-Lago, it rekindled faith in a dangerous proposition. It was until recently a nothing-burger, like the 45th Moron-in-Chief, but it is today front and center of attention this ongoing investigation. OK, it is a Witch-Hunt with merit. And to make matters worse off, his Moron staff joined in this attack upon the FBI and now members of the GOP are on board this attack plan to euthanize Mueller. Assholes like Newt Gingrich, mentioned again, who once cherished a Robert Mueller at the helm are now taking cheap shots at the “Chief Law Enforcer’s” credibility? Look, if a guy like Mueller finds his credibility under scrutiny, we as a nation are way off course! That is dangerous territory to venture into, be careful who you tango with especially if this country’s FBI! Not only does that entity know all, hears all, it can make things up that would appear forever to be the “Truth, the whole Truth so help me J. Edgar”. But the Trump Tower, his cohorts in shame and now the GOP Congress, they are STUPID this demonstration to pick a WAR with Mueller. They may win the battles, but in the end it will be COVFEFE time, lights out. So, how best to bring justice for such a jackoffadaisical and condescending perverted justice attitude by the MORON faction of society? Simple, destroy the Trump Tower family name and wealth. That is what is happening, this drip-by-drip is designed to cause hate and discontent amongst the privileged, keeping the perverts on edge. In fighting and finger pointing will implode tranquility then explode and expose it all – it is a self-destructive behavioral mechanism. Mueller acts out the Henry Murray fascination, as to how one with legal lawman power can pretend to push the “needs assessment” to the limit with respect to “Half of the people can be part right all of the time and some of the people can be all right part of the time, but all the people can't be all right all the time” and prevail and laugh all the way to that well deserved “Day Off”! And when the “shat hits the fan” the “Golden Shower” will not have enough capability or capacity to douche douse the meltdown. I am sure this will be the worst Christmas ever for the Trump family and it is wearing away idiot by idiot, the intent of this investigation. Why so this infatuation to destroy an entire family instead of sending a few “stools” to the clink? Prosecuting with the intent to seek jail time is difficult in these situations, compounded by the fact it could end up being an exercise in frustration, due the “pardoning” power of the President. Mueller knows what he is doing, and it is easy to see already the outcome of his plan, which is in REALITY just protecting the men and women dedicated to…well they have a duty to protect the President, his family and all the MORON can do is fire back empty rounds like he suffers from Erectile Dysfunction? IMAGINE attacking those that are supposed to protect – STUPIDITY need I say any more. Which means the MORON gives not a rat’s ass about his family, remember “I’m the only one that matters”. But this is U.S. Taxpayer money well spent, this continued sweeping investigation, as we must start to tear apart the wealth that blinds us through this binding together of despicable favoritism behavior from Un-Patriotic wealth hoarding. This investigation may be the catalyst that tears down that “Wall of Wealth”, that money cannot buy everything! Simple Simon, the more money the more control upon what we get for freedom’s sake in comparison to what they get, it is no longer a 2-way street. Their easy street needs a “Detour” sign! So, Mueller is looking out for, well Patriotic America which is rooted not in tax-free 10-million-dollar estates set aside for purposes of evasion, but this land belongs to the “salt of the earth proletariats” and when the wealthy see fit to act above the law, thank God for Mr. Mueller and the FBI. Said again, this entire “Golden Shower” affair would have been by now but a lessons learned for the sake of “History”, gone away, but the MORON – well maybe he is really broke-poor so has nothing to lose and could in the end claim “Martyrdom” has he and his family cry-baby all the way to Bankruptcy court – and that is where we will see True Patriotic justice served! And when it is official of “Robert Mueller’s Day Off”, rest assured we have taken back what was lost through “Hooky”.

Sunday, December 10, 2017

This Day