Books & Writings by SPam McGee

Alaska Short Stack Stories, Series I, II, & III ~ Alaska's Deadliest Sin-Drill Baby Drill ~ Alaskan Company Man ~ Eklutna Lake Worrier ~ From the Fifth Floor ~ Hannah Cove ~ My Journey to Landes House ~ Poemetrics ~ Quinn the "Tanik" Eskimo ~ S.O.S. from Beaver Lake ~ The Teachings of the Swamp Fox ~ Trans-Alaska-Pipeline Funny Stories ~ Spirit Dog & the Ghost Wind


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Thursday, January 31, 2013

Geronimo's Skull

Look, I was not in favor of Obama's pick to replace Poindexter, I mean Hillary. Those glasses, those glasses! Are those things 3D, maybe long range experimental eavesdropping spectacles, so the Madam can keep an eye on the Madman when she is far and away? Hey, has anybody seem Monica? Anyway, my “NEY” upon John “Forbes” Kerry was based on the fact that this appointee is testament that there is still a pandemic of BED and this “BAD” choice was a continuation of the “Goodfellas”, that segregated good'ol boys club that has taken over “Our” government and taken us over the cliff. BED? Beltway Explosive Diarrhea. Look, there existed thousands of qualified individuals not at all affiliated with the failed Congress - a failure that is going into its 16th year - that could have taken over for Poindexter, I mean Hillary. It's those glasses! When a government gets so selfishly entrenched that ordinary citizens cannot have a bid at a job like that afforded the position as “Secretary of State”, we have everything to fear. Mr. Forbes may be qualified, but so are many others that could come to the “beltway” with a clean slate and maybe foster a cleansing attitude wherein “We the People” could find comfort once again as too what roll “government” plays with respect to “Our” goals - that being life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Now talk about comfort, maybe I was wrong too early on, as Obama has already sent John Kerry his marching orders as the newly selected Secretary of State. And this is great, as that first mandatory sentencing is for Kerry to make good and erase an obstacle that has for years caused bitterness between the Native Americans and U.S. Government treaties. Yes, Secretary of State John “Forbes” Kerry has been instructed to return the skull of “Geronimo the Terrible”, which has been a bone of contention forever since Prescott Bush - the kingpin of the Bush dysentery dynasty - stole it away, as an artifact for the Yale-men's Skull & Bones club. Kerry has sworn that he is a member of this elitist private club with headquarters in some casket like vault over yonder Yale. The fact that Geronimo's skull remains missing but with enough evidence that it is incarcerated in a “white man's'” vault, it is time to bring it home and place it back with its rightful owner, the Bedonkohe Apache Nation. And this task is in line with that of the Secretary of State's obligation, as a specific duty inherent that position calls for advising the President on matters crucial to U.S. foreign nation policies, and the “Apache Nation” fits that criteria. So now maybe we can get closure this still sad reminder in history, as if Kerry fails his first mission, my sentiment that it was a poor choice wins the lottery. That is why Kerry won the “secret” endorsement from Congress, as this “mission” code-named “Geronimo” was talked about when Osama Bin Laden was assassinated, as it was so approved that Geronimo's reign as a terrorist has been replaced and now that Bin is dead, his skull can become that artifact so revered by the members of the Skull & Bones. Imagine, kissing the skull of a terrorists! So like was witnessed just recently with a parade down Pennsylvania Avenue, with Obama's swearing in again, maybe soon we will see a pow-wow of great significance wherein the remains of this great worrier finds that long over due resting place, where it rightfully belongs in the peacefulness of Turkey Creek - wherein also the stale stench of crypt concrete can be liberated away, and the Great Geronimo Nation can once again live in peace, and this secret Yale club can commence kissing someone else's ass!

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Unclear Fallout

It appears the Japanese “prefectures” are now missing the once “perfect” attribute, following the Tokoku earthquake. Yes, the green pastures along the coast and somewhat inland looks still so inviting and soothing, but appears to be sick! During the ground shaking, it appears the guts of the Fukushima nuclear reactors fell apart and for well over a year allowed radiation to spoil the air, which spoiled the rainwater and radiated the grazing lands, which seems to have radiated the famed Kobe & Wagyu beef industry. That nuclear fallout event was a 7 on the International Nuclear Event Scale, which means deadly radiation spewed away from its intended incarceration for weeks. But the lesions and tumors being discovered on the beef today, some 2-years gone by since the disaster, it is causing not a scare but a hit amongst those that have the economic freedom to enjoy this expensive cut of beef - sometimes tallying upwards $475.00 a pound delivered to uppity-up restaurants in NYC. Damn, how many Big Macs does that loot amount too? And cat & dog food made from the leftovers at the rendering plants, once again fit only for the 1% faction, how about $35 a can! Maybe the FOOD channel should re-assess those shows designed to help fend off starvation, as they are still stuck on $10-dollar a day meals for the proletariat class – that's the working class here in America. Anyway, talk about pampered pets. Anyway again, the radiated beef which now sports lesions and tumors, that living growth from the radiation is causing yet another aging process that is winning favorite upon the palate those that can indulge in this meal fit for the wealthy class. only Yes indeed, the radiation is causing the beef cattle to develop tumors and lesions that are acting like a natural MSG, and tenderizing the beef when still on the hoof. These beef cattle are sick to the stomach, yet allowed to survive for a profit! USDA approved? And because of this radiation sickness, which not only tenderizes even more this famed “tender” meat, it is adding another flavor of richness, as the living growth from the nuclear fallout gives away digestive chemicals during the growth process called “oxidation stress disoder”, so this stuff is at an all time demand and prices may tip out at $1000 per pound! Now many experts thought the nuclear fallout would be but a death grip upon this preferential industry, guess not. So for those that cannot afford such cuts of beef, which means you may never taste or ever see the affects of nuclear fallout and its effect upon the flesh of once healthy free-range cattle, here it is in living color? Remember, cooked rare is the best! Bona petite if you still have an appetite!

(Hunk of imported Kobe beef showing signs of "Oxidation Stress Disorder" throughout flesh, a form of radiation sickness)

Sunday, January 20, 2013

January 21

Today's real HERO

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Reward the Rapists

As Alaska’s governess, Sarah Palin gave away $500-million to Trans-Canada for nothing in return. That should have been a lessons learned. “Good Riddance” she rode off into the sunset on her broom and quit midstream, which helped us secure our “Constitutional Budget Reserve”, or what was left of it. But her replacement, Sean Parnell, he wants to trump Sarah in the “giveaway” program and welfare roll $billions$ to “Big Oil”, for nothing in return. “Big Oil” is finished in Alaska, the “Golden Goose Days” have come and gone, and from now on end it will be but a tepid demonstration towards oil development. All good things do come to an end eventually, it is not perpetual – the easy pickings oil is done with. Writing on the wall? When the Trans-Alaska-Pipeline was “reconfigured” to handle the existing production and nothing more, that sounded the warning that Alaska has seen its time as “King Patch” with respect to oil exploration and exploitation. The “Strategic Reconfiguration” project extended the TAPS usefulness for another 30-years by taking into account an expert forecast upon “oil production”, which is and will remain ¼ of what it once realized in the heydays. So like it or not this project sets in stone what to expect for the future. It is the bellwether indicator, as “Big Oil” is smart, NOT stupid. On the other hand, Parnell seems to have discovered the dunce cap and is not taking this into account and what it means for the future, even if the “Independents” strike it rich - which doesn’t appear to be the case as the major “Little Guys” are finding more failures then success. Just ask Mr. Pioneer. Parnell’s attempt to lower the tax burden on “Big Oil” is like rewarding the rapists. Now even if Parnell’s plan had merit and lowering the tax burden allowed for a whole bunch of oil to be discovered today, the pipeline which is owned by “Big Oil” is the bottleneck, as many of the stations have been mothballed – for a very clever reason. It would take 5-years to get the TAPS back into shape to handle what it once delivered to Valdez. “Big Oil” plans for the future, and even if they knew Parnell would wimp out and give in on the “Oil Taxation” issues, it’s over with! So the fact that Parnell thinks a tax break is an incentive and what it takes to make Alaska “King Patch” once again, it doesn’t work. Sean, “Big Oil” is finished here in the “Lost Frontier”! In fact, go sit on the shitter and read what Scott Goldsmith said a few days before Parnell delivered his “state of the state”, “Stop spending, SAVE”. And this guy knows what he is talking about! Basically, Parnell wants to make favor with “Big Oil” and that is not becoming a state’s governor, as he is supposed to be “For the People” first. That is not the case today, not what we heard from Parnell’s most recent “state of the state” address to the legislature. Here is my take on what should be done. When Bill Sheffield was indicted by a Grand Jury for “serious abuse of office”, the people of this state stood strong and we wanted  to impeach then governor Bill, as should have been the outcome for such abuse. But even though the “Jury” had the evidence, we were screwed over impeachment attempts by a corrupt legislature, so the people lost out and Bill gained popularity. But the time has come again wherein we must stand together against “pilferage” upon our “reserve”. We must come together once again, and “Impeach” Parnell. Look, we own the resources, which means we own the fruits that commodity bears and if Parnell gets it his way and gives away “$billions$ based on speculative reasons, when the experts are saying just the opposite that makes sence, like “Stop spending and SAVE”, we must take action through a 1st Amendment militia mentality  “Impeachment” attempt.  Call, e-mail or write your representative now informing that “you” plan to join in on any and all petitions that will impeach Parnell. Look, the tax issues are complicated, made so for a reason, to make it look like it will help - it won’t. Estimates of Parnell’s welfare program to “Big Oil” will never ever recoup was he plans to give away, it is that simple. In fact, it is a big gamble and no matter what as has always been the case, “Big Oil” has always held that “ACE in the hole” position, no different today. They have held Parnell hostage, for no other reason than “Greed” and he has fallen for the coup. “IMPEACH PARNELL” petitions will soon be posted throughout Alaska, please do not hesitate to sign on, as we owe it to ourselves to stop this “carriage before the horse” in midstream, before it is too late. Remember, it is your money he is giving away like candy on Halloween!

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Young Alaskans

To all of the “Young” Alaskan out there, how many wasted precious time last night listening to Governor Sean “Give Away the Farm” Parnell’s “State of the State”? I don’t blame anyone for being derelict and not listening in, as once again the speech was nothing more than a fabricated way to say screw you Alaskans. Look Sean, read what the experts have said, there ain’t going to be a “Big” gas line project, there’s an export ban in effect for North Slope gas! A ban only the sitting U.S. President can lift, so it ain’t going to happen on your watch, as Obama knows how you feel towards his health care and gun control reform. And how much more money will Sean and the legislature give away, for nothing in return? This state has already spent over a $billion$ to just study a gas line, and it is no closer to delivering affordable energy to the citizens of this state. We needed a gas line yesterday, not for export, for in state use. That should be the number “ONE” priority and if you wonder why the military brass is thinking of shutting down many of the bases here in the “Lost Frontier”, too expensive to buy coal! Look, the guy that knows best this state’s “Health”, that single most “State of the State” grade being the “economy”, well Scott Goldsmith has said it like it is, “Cut Spending and SAVE”! Us “Older” Alaskans, we once thought that nobody could top Bill Sheffield as an incompetent governor, seems like Sean will even outdo Bill, and that is pretty pathetic. So to sum things up, Sean’s address can be identified with a Bob Dylan tune, Maggie’s’ Farm:

I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
No, I aint gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
Well, I wake up in the morning
Fold my hands and pray for rain
I got a head full of ideas
That are drivin' me insane
It's a shame the way she makes me scrub the floor
I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more.

I ain't gonna work for Maggie's brother no more
No, I aint gonna work for Maggie's brother no more
Well, he hands you a nickel
He hands you a dime
He asks you with a grin
If you're havin' a good time
Then he fines you every time you slam the door
I ain't gonna work for Maggie's brother more.

I ain't gonna work for Maggie's pa no more
No, I aint gonna work for Maggie's pa no more
Well, he puts his cigar
Out in your face just for kicks
His bedroom window 
It is made out of bricks
The National Guard stands around his door
Ah, I ain't gonna work for Maggie's pa no more.

I ain't gonna work for Maggie's ma no more
No, I ain't gonna work for Maggie's ma no more
Well, when she talks to all the servants
About man and God and law
Everybody says
She's the brains behind pa
She's sixty-eight, but she says she's twenty-four
I ain't gonna work for Maggie's ma no more.

I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
I aint gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
Well, I try my best
To be just like I am
But everybody wants you
To be just like them
They say sing while you slave and I just get bored
I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more.

More lyrics:

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Kincaid Park!

Please, pretty please stay away! I am talking about the snow-machine fanatics that want to invade Kincaid Park. Look, the last time there came an invasion – from the soccer moms – a hazardous waste zone was uncovered, by the kick of a soccer ball! That turnover of soil cost us Anchorage property owners a whole bunch! Now imagine what a bunch of tundra grinding machines could do, maybe uncover Ben Stevens' secret “skeleton” closet – and that is something we don't want uncovered! Or would we? Maybe the names of the little girls that Bill Allen abused while under the influence of Ted Stevens would be revealed, but those kids have seen enough suffering pain and need no more publicity. But here is my take on the snow-machine debates. Shutdown the Fort Richardson ARMY base, demobilize it and open up the lands for recreational use. There exists thousands of acres that would be great for snow-machine enthusiasts and since there exists already on the base a fast-food concessions, hey this is Arctic Cat heaven. And there is a hospital! I am not a snow-machiner as placing “duct tape” across the face for protection from the cold, it hurts! What do you mean that's the Alaskan equivalent of “Botox” treatment? Does it really rip off the wrinkles? But understand that we can only have so many military bases here in Alaska, as times have changed and cuts are coming our way. So why not put “this land is your land this land is my land” to good use right now? Alaska is still a valuable place to stand-down our troops just in case, but there is a corrupt element that is ruining this “valuable” asset and sending several of the once prime target cold war bases onto the BRAC listing, also known as the “Black List”. The brass in charge of the military has to live within its budget, wherein we will see less and less money appropriated towards the military as we see peace on the horizon. So the brass must make tough and calculated choices, as once it gets out of the bag that a base may get the ax, in runs the Congressional delegation of the constituency surrounding the effective base closure to perform all kinds of illegal maneuvers - to twist the arm of the brass in changing their minds or else. It is very UN-American some of these tactics, UN-becoming a U.S. Senator, UN-becoming a U.S. Representative. It involves Congressional threats, but with such threats upon the guys that have the “codes” comes immunity, the delegation gets away with it and the brass gets a black eye. Look Mr. Begich, they are only doing their job. So are you I guess, in vain to keep the aging military bases in Alaska away from the demolition wrecking ball! But their job is much more important so please, stay out of their way! They swear to protect this country and listen to the Commander-in-Chief, you Mr. Begich, you swear upon something we Americans are still trying to figure out and it appears you have no intention of protecting this country by letting the brass call the shots, as it becomes a “state vs. nation” or else you loose your seat and may have to return to work. Anyway, Alaska is not sitting very well with the brass on the existing military budget consensus, due a simpleton reason. There are many factors that go into the BRAC decisions, some political, but for the most part the brass look at the cost of keeping a base operating with respect to its superiority with respect to protecting America so the U.S. Taxpayers can get the best bang for that buck. Now in Alaska, due “Greed”, we have shot ourselves in the foot. Many of the bases in Alaska have been “privatized” with respect to the utilities at these bases, like for heat, electricity, water and waste-water. “Privatization” was supposed to save in the long run. But in Alaska, we now see costs escalating to 100% over what was required when civil servants performed the same damn job – and that was one of the main reasons “privatization” made sense as it would cut down on overloaded overhead. And since the “private” entity that acquired many of the “privatization contracts here in Alaska seems to think it can renege on its promise and so obliged to take on the ARMY in a court of law, the JAG have come to the rescue, to make sure the U.S. Taxpayers are not screwed by the Canadians. In all honesty, today much of the “privatized” military utility infrastructure here in Alaska finds a lien against it from a Canadian bank? So that is strike “One” against the military operations here in the “Last Frontier”. Strike “Two” comes in the form of energy costs, and Alaska ranks on the bottom of the list, even though coal is still the cheapest form of energy for generating heat to keep the troops warm and in efforts to generate electricity so troops can read the battle plans. When the Defense Logistics Agency bartered for reasonable coal delivery contracts, they went proud that across America from sea to shining sea they contracted agreements that realized a 5% reduction – which meant $billions$ in cost savings for the U.S. Taxpayers. EXCEPTION! In Alaska due no competition and what appears to be constipation, the cost of coal from Joe Uselessbelli went up 14%! Look, the Koreans can get coal cheaper from Joe then what our own military can bargain for? See, the Koreans can say “F%$# You Joe”, and find cheaper coal from Canada. If the brass said the same, well the Alaska delegation would once again threaten those that keep us safe! So the cost of energy plays into the fact that Alaska's military bases will be shut-down, sooner than later. And strike three comes from the way this state's delegation holds hostage our men and women in uniform. When Begich placed a hold on military promotions because he thought the AIR FORCE was not being truthful in its assessment of Eielsen Air Force base, Begich used tactics that would have found him hung out to dry in some countries. The reason Eielsen was on the chopping block is this very simple fact. The cost of coal and the fact that the aging power plant has never been able to meet the air quality permit requirements. Yes, today that base is operating a coal burning power plant that doesn't have a state air quality permit – so it needs a new power plant, this is costly and is one of the things that goes into the equation of sustainability. These are simple reasons and not excuses, yet the Alaskan delegation continues to piss off the brass and maybe they can pick their battles, win a few of those battles here and there, but we have NOT the power or tenacity to win the “WAR”. I understand that Mr. Begich's tactics pissed the brass off so bad, this scare tactic to hold back on promotions military men and women deserving who had nothing too do whatsoever as to what was occurring in Alaska, the brass at the top were willing to test the Missile Defense Shield to see how accurate it was! So let's do the brass a favor, ask them to consider shutting down Fort Richardson and turning the mine-free and ordinance-free recreation area over to the public. Think of the possibilities for the snow-machiners and those that enjoy the tranquility of skiing at Kincaid, they can all have it their way. For the machiners, it means new frontier to trash, hunt, ice fishing, racing and right here in our own backyard. And since the base is surrounded by barbed-wire fence and a security detail, we can have our own Summit Lake drunken brawlathon – with the convenience of a sober up time lock-down behind that fence, with men armed with AR's. And since most of the CEA overhead power lines lead to that base, one could leave his or her home on the Hillside and in 20-minutes be in the wilderness! And the U.S. Taxpayers could enjoy $millions$ in cost savings. Look, we can get that land for a buck, now this something the delegation should be working on! EXCEPT? There is nothing corrupt this simple plan as “We the People” benefit, there is no free-loading loopholes for the lobby, and that is not what representation is all about these days.

Brought to you by the MickPrick Show, where everyone is a victim and posted on the Alaska Chinook blog, the posting that Alaskan democrats and republicans refuse to read, as an independent voice scares the crap out of them!

Saturday, January 12, 2013

On Your Mark!

OK, so my prediction is like this. The Revolution will start next week. When Hey Joe Biden asks, “we're you going with that gun in your hand”, as part of Obama's gun control task force. Look, the fear factor amongst the gun toting Tea-Party is almost on “TILT”. One eensie teensie iota of government interaction into the 2nd Amendment, it will incite those so inclined to pass “On Your Mark, Get Ready” and onto “Set” your sights and “GO”! The shot of anger will be heard across this land, calling that militia mania to commit Scary Carey, as it appears many gun owners can't read or are too busy preparing for “it's the end” survival that they heed not the warning from the Supreme Court Justices. Look, Scalia said your guns are safe. Get a grip away from that “grip”! But in reality, I can't wait to see this creepy crawler group of lemmings take on Uncle Sam when Obama reacts to those questioning his “Executive Privilege authority and issues a Citizens United ban on ARgh assault weapons. They will revolt, and the blood bath will be over with by high noon! And with Martial Law temporarily enacted, there will be 300-million guns turned in as for the most part, this gang of hoodlums bent on a false pretense of fear continue to behave like cowards! Of the many Tea-Party fans I have come to know over the years in Alaska and elsewhere, they are lost without their weapons right beside them, 24/7. And of course it will be a short lived battle, as this militia has no idea what is involved in securing it their way. They are outnumbered, not only by arms, black powder and bullets, but decency rules those with a brain and not bent on civil disorder, not bent on the fact that a “revolution by trigger” is needed to re-balance this country – at least NOT a blood bath type of a revolution. If any, an intellectual revolution would be a welcome, but the deck is stacked, as the gun barrel lobby has Not a brain or lick of intelligence upon this issue – ARgh weapons having no place in a civil society. The days of the blood bath type revolutions are over with, the end to that chapter occurred in L.A. a few years ago when Rodney King was beat up, so the fact that there exists a bunch of gun owners that have been waiting for their day in court, so be it - as it will happen in my time and most likely on Obama's watch. It is the main reason that Mitch McConnell has tried in vain to destroy Obama, as he knows already what the outcome will be for his constituency, as he must demand the National Guard to protect “government”, not those that voted for him and believe we must arm even our teachers! So maybe we have run out of time and it is time. There is a whole lot of discontent here in America, so something must give. We have a Congress that can't get involved with anything “civil” except their own pay raise. So if Obama uses the “EO”, which he has already my approval to do so, to outlaw anything with the letters “g” “u” or “n” and not intended for hunting, then we will see the crazed go into Armageddon berserk mode and there will exist a “lock-down”, but like already mentioned, a short blip and then we can get on to business with at least one road block no longer in the way – the Tea-Party. Look, we are all “correct” in some respect our views, that is the right of the “Almighty” Amendment called “free speech”, but why cannot we compromise any longer? It means a give and take society, or else we are doomed. And if we chose that route and go down the road to destruction, when the smoke clears we will find a totally different climate – I mean society – and believe me, it will be like it should be wherein we give peace a chance and that paints a picture of “Socialism”, which in my book doesn't sound so bad in comparison to what we have before us today. Socialism has one all important aspect associated with it, it destroys “Greed”. And if asked today what is holding up this nation, holding us back, it is “Greed”. And when “Greed” infiltrates civility and causes a WACO mentality and a class war, we must resort to a system of merit different that destroys the perpetrator. Wealth, it must be destroyed or else we will destroy ourselves. It is no longer the fear of nuclear annihilation that scares this nation, or a terrorist attack, it is our own misgivings that are destroying us. Socialism, well it redistributes the wealth, and in my book, I would like to get back some of my hard earned money taken away through “taxation” then hoarded away by the wealthy class – that is where a redistribution makes sense, giving it back to its rightful owner. Why not try it, if it fails us we can resort to a militia spirit, hand out guns to every citizen and at the count of three have a real Texas like shootout. With Socialism it is NOT the blind leading the blind, but “pride”, self perseverance and equality that makes a difference. With Socialism, what is there to fear? And what ever happened to that famous FDR sermon, “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself”. Wow, thanks Mr. Roosevelt, as if we take your speech and take it to heart, we have the American spirit reborn! And isn't that what we are really after?


I would not want to be in the EPA's shoes, with the notice of fine it as sent SHELL, for what the EPA officials believe was excessive air pollution from SHELL's short-lived exploration attempt last year up in Alaska, offshore in the Chukchi and Beaufort. A venture doomed from the get-go culminating with SHELL's $billion$ dollar blunder, the grounding of the Kulluk off of Kodiak Island. Look, the SHELL flotilla left Dutch Harbor with contaminated fuel, marine engine gasoline that had too much damn sulfur. Testing of the fuel was required, and back in August the EPA was monitoring the testing. Sample after sample proved convincing that this flotilla was stuck and would never get the “Green” light to “Go North”. Then like magic, the problem went away. There was no way in hell that all the contaminated fuel from so many boats part of the exploration flotilla could be offloaded then tanks refreshed with the legal stuff, as Dutch Harbor does not have that kind of infrastructure – its a fishing town! Yes, the flotilla was allowed to sail with fuel tanks holding marine gasoline high in sulfur, no doubt about it. That sulfur fouled the pollution abating equipment, it fouled the marine engines, the reason the Avig lost its grip on the Kulluk. This is not rocket science, but common sense evidence. Contaminated fuel is what caused the pollution and only because somebody with “power” allowed SHELL to sail north with the contaminated fuel. As the window of opportunity for the exploration season was closing in, it became the proverbial “Do or Die” mandate. Had SHELL been banned from sailing north, it would have doomed this entire Arctic Ocean exploration frenzy as this was the “Litmus Test”. And the EPA knew all about the contaminated fuel, I have the e-mails! But the EPA had been under scrutiny, by Alaska's D.C. Delegation, so now we see the outcome! Bottom-line, Alaska's delegation corrupt way & means to “bully” the EPA away from its duties will allow every damn environmental group and oversight group to now “formidably excite” a ban upon oil and gas exploration forever in the Chukchi & Beaufort. It will mean thousands of jobs lost, not to mention a loss of income from leases and resource royalty. Remember this the next time you visit that voting booth!

Brought to you by the MickPrick Show, where everyone is a victim this “True” information as posted on the Alaska Chinook blog, the posting that Alaskan democrats and republicans refuse to read, as an independent voice scares the “crap” out of them!

Friday, January 11, 2013

Angie's List

OK, so I went on-line to Angie's List, because I was looking for a reference. According to Angie: “Get the real story. Search Angie’s List for detailed reviews of everyone you need — from contractors to doctors, roofers to plumbers, dog walkers to cake decorators.” So I filled in the application for the following person(s) of interest. I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter: So help me God. Low and behold, I received some feedback from Angie. Accordingly, this was a tough question and rare that it returned only one individual that met the qualifications. A Mr. Bernie Sanders from the state of Vermont. In simple terms, this is what has become of our representation, one out of 535 that can get the stamp of approval from Angie! But if I need a Roto-Rooter guy, overwhelming!

Great Toilet Paper

I love the days after Christmas, as the book stores sell things “dirt cheap”. So I picked up a bunch of books that were not selling, called “Bullies”, by an asshole named Shapiro. Now I don't read trash, but I assure you that if you read this book, it will survive nothing worthwhile for future generations or close to realism but is great for recycling, as it is truly worth only a single function. Not so by what is between the lines this writing not deserving a book shelf, but cleaning up what may get between the fingers. Honestly, buy this book on the cheap then enjoy a good you know what and when wiping with the pages of this 1st Amendment “crap” that should be burned, think of the author as a genuine piece of that “crap”! For real, I didn't buy this book, never would entertain supporting an idiot that has no idea what he is saying accept what appears to be a run amuck of the mouth, also known as ED – Explosive Diarrhea. In fact when he appeared on a local talk show and ruined my appetite, his rant was monitored by the PJW 3DBB and on the ED scale, a BIG 10 – a first for the 2013 season!

Brought to you by the MickPrick Show, where everyone is a victim!

ARMY Victory

Wow. Anybody that has followed the battle brewing between Doyon Utilities and the U.S. ARMY must be delighted that the Regulatory Commission of Alaska has informed both parties that the best forum to resolve contract disputes is the court system. According to an opinion and ruling most recently made right before the holidays, "If Doyon and the DoD have a dispute over the terms of the contracts, or compliance with those terms, they should present their dispute in the appropriate forum and request a stay of these proceedings." By DIRECTION OF THE COMMISSION (Commissioner Janis W. Wilson, dissenting with a separate statement. Commissioners Paul F. Lisankie and T.W. Patch, not participating.) So my sentiment this warning, Merry Christmas Doyon! See, if this goes to the courts – which it should – the ARMY would prevail for the U.S. Taxpayers as it is outright fraud to what Doyon believes it requires to perform the contract, to maintain and operate the “privatized” utilities at the military bases in Alaska. The scare came about when Doyon’s head honcho - a crock named Gavora - tried to convince the RCA that it required a 100% increase in revenue, so it could pay back its almost delinquent loans to a Canadian based bank – Toronto Dominion! It is sad when an entity like Doyon is ruining the good name of the Doyon shareholders - a shareholder membership that includes Native Alaskans. See, the Alaskan Natives have been screwed enough by “white collar crime white men”, so enough is enough. With the U.S. ARMY JAG putting up its dukes to confront Doyon, it is not only for the best interest of the U.S. Taxpayers but also for protection the Native American spirit – that civilization already screwed over enough. See, in efforts to win this lucrative contract, worth a $billion$ and 50-years in duration, Doyon told the custody transfer surveyors that it would utilize local banks for infusion of cash to upgrade the aging facilities – which would be paid back by Uncle Sam above & beyond but not to the point of highway robbery – so the requirement for local Alaskan based banks made sense. The interest collected by Doyon from the ARMY in the $millions$ over the contract duration should benefit America, not the Queen! But now, with the $120-million in debt and Doyon Utilities in over its head, the Canadians own our military infrastructure! The “privatization” of the military infrastructure here in Alaska was intended to save Uncle Sam money, save the U.S. Taxpayers money, not make self-made millionaires – like appears the trend so far with this “privatized” venture only 3-years in the making. I guess Doyon thinks it wants to be in that “bailout” binge. But Doyon bit off more then it could chew, by taking on the Defense Logistics Agency JAG and that ferocity from the brass along with the ruling from the RCA, well pray tell as now Doyon is baking off and has dropped its ridiculous revenue demands. I guess the threat of military intervention changed a few minds! Now those that think and want to arm themselves to the hilt with ARgh assault weapons because they forgot that “the only thing to fear is fear itself”, attempting to intimidate through a tyrannic apocalyptic nuisance against “our” government, well in this case against “Corporate America” it appears “your” government cares about abuse and is willing to take troublemakers to task, like is occurring here. And when one sees the line-up, of those involved in trying to overthrow “our” government with frivolous requirements meant to defraud, to rape, you best be on the side that's winning as that line-up reeks with treason. So GO ARMY!

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OK, so the ARR Alaska Railroad records 685-miles of “qualified track”. Qualified means that track which undergoes routine maintenance activities like the application of harsh chemicals for weed control. Don't eat those berries, and if you or the dog piss red after a walk along the rail...! Anyway, Internal Revenue Code 45G – which was most recently extended again with the Bidden & McConnell “Fiscal Cliff” slug fest negotiations, it allows for a tax deduction of $3500 for each mile of “Qualified Track” if that “track” is assigned to another entity and that entity picks up the bill for performing the required maintenance, including applying that cancer causing pesticide. Now the ARR - whose board membership includes Bill Sheffield who still can't decide which side of the fence he is on politically, which causes him to endure annoying nosebleeding - well it can't utilize this “tax credit” like a private entity can so miraculously transfers this tax incentive to one of two private entities that operate here in the “Lost Frontier” and utilize the rail for business. Now according to the public relations kiosk over at the “depot”, the ARR cannot divulge who this private entity is, as even though this is a state with a constitution that forbids secrecy in government, the ARR board was allowed to pass some dire strait “forbidding laws” that allows for secrecy. But it is not rocket science trying to figure out to whom this “secret” entity finds ownership and taking advantage this tax haven transfer. So let's see if we can “Name that Corporation”? We have the Koch Brothers that utilize the rail, for shipping refined products up and down the contaminated rail right-of-way. Honestly, when the Alaska Railroad went up for sale as a condition of “statehood” as before “We're In” it was under the jurisdiction of the Federal Railroad Act, well there came “One” interested investor, but that interest could not get the state to issue an immunity clause with respect to “NO Liability” due the contaminated 685-mile right-of-way that was then a consideration as a candidate under the Super-Fund Act. So this entity laughed all the way back to the lower-48 and the state was left with picking up the pieces, and today we have the “Secret Alaska Railroad Corporation” that has never ended up showing a profit, not without Uncle Sam through Don Young “pork” sweetening the pot – the latter incorporating the CEO's hefty salary. Imagine, running a business that makes not a profit yet getting a weekly paycheck that is out of this world because the ARR has been the United States' “Bail Me Out” poster child for how long? Doesn't make sense in my book. And if this is not the Koch dynasty that enjoys the “qualified Rail” tax haven transfer, then the other user would have too be none other then Joe Uselessbelli, the guy that ships coal cheaper to Korea then what can be bartered for by the Defense Logistics Agency to keep “OUR” troops warm! No wonder the Alaska ARMY bases are on the chopping block, as greed can sink even “Big Wild Ships”. Now when we reconsider the “Board” affiliation, it is very well politically endowed, so must cringe on the fact that even though it remains out of bankruptcy due a yearly infusion of Uncle Sam welfare in the tune of $45-million, the fact that it cannot contribute to political WAR chests - like for Don Young when Don goes to bat to keep that ARR government welfare check a reality - it must bug the executive branch, as everybody else can contribute according to Citizens-United! But with the ARR, it is a state entity and that requirement for “No Political Contributions” satisfies “separation”. Yet like anything else over-time, high paid CEO's are always looking for a loophole and it appears the “Rail” boss and his posse have found a ways and means to “contribute”, even with the ban in effect. See, whether it is the Koch suckers or Joe's coal cars that takes advantage this “tax” write-off incentive, there is an imbalance in the equation. The ARR gets a check in the tune of $4.8-million for this “Track” assignment and performs the required maintenance, wherein Joe or Charlie gets to write-off 50% of that maintenance fee, or $2.4-million is secured away from Uncle Sam. Now for reasons suspicious, the entity that gets this tax deduction bonus is also handed over a gift, in the tune of $2.7-million in “transport credit” from the ARR board of directors! The ARR “gives” this “”transport credit” as part of the “agreement”. Look nothing is free! So Joe or Charlie gives the ARR board of directors – maybe Bill carries the check over to the depot, at least that keeps him away from the Port – and in return there is issued a credit equaling more then the balance, or $4.8-million in finds $5.1-million in return? That's a 6.25% Return-on-Investment - per year. I guess to some the ARR is a decent bank, when we have before us a tanked economy. Remember, nothing is “free” in this day and age. Now in the tax code world, this “extra” is all a gift, as it is not revenue form services rendered, once again nothing is “free” in capitalized America. So one could argue that $2.4-million is “awash”, for the track maintenance expenditures not covered by the “tax” deductions allowed under IRC 45G. But up to now there is one happy recipient that is left with an additional $300,000, as a gift! So guess what is more likely then not happening to this gift? It is not revenue but an asset that must be accounted for. Look, it is well known that the Koch suckers have contributed “$millions$ to help wipe out Obama and wipe out unions. This extra “loot”, this “gift” from the ARR board of directors serves no useful business purpose whatsoever, as if the ARR can throw away money. It the U.S. Taxpayers' money, give it back to Uncle Sam, give it back to the taxpayers - its rightful owner. Look, it raises suspicion. So the best way to hide this “gift”, as a political donation. In ending, this does not surprise me as the Alaska Railroad has been getting away with fraud the last 6-years, with the money it receives for “commuter rail” services that is a big fat joke like lie. And when finally they were caught by someone that is trying to make a difference in Congress and making sure the U.S. Taxpayers are not screwed left, right and in between, wherein this money was about to be chopped – because it was “fraud” money - the board ran and hid behind Don Young. And what else can we expect accept more pilferage upon the U.S. Taxpayers and Don smiling all the way to retirement under the coconut tree! For those that would like to take this on, here is what the ARR kiosk informed:
"I checked with our accounting and legal departments for information to respond to your inquiry. For purposes of the Internal Revenue Code §45G, ARRC entered into an agreement with a customer where the customer paid ARRC $4.8 million for maintenance expenses performed by ARRC and others on its mainline; these expenses met the IRS definition of qualified track maintenance expenses as defined in that internal revenue code section. The agreement also required that ARRC provide a credit to the customer for shipments on the railroad in the amount of $2.7 million. The agreement specifies that ARRC may not disclose who the customer is without prior consent. The qualified track miles include our mainline, sidings and yard track, totaling about 685 track miles." 

In ending, the state's attorney general should be investigating this, to see if that “transport credit” is a ways and means to hide political contributions. If not, then why are we so generous and giving the hen-house away?

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MissHell Bachmann

Dear Honorable Paul D. Irving; 

You were sworn in as the Sergeant at Arms of the U.S. House of Representatives on January 17, 2012, and that has allowed more then enough time for an assessment to arrest Misshell Bachmann for “Treason”. Please perform your duties and today arrest MissHell before it is too late and she reveals sensitive information to the wrong party that could and will weaken our stance on terrorists' attacks here in the Homeland. It is your duty, so please act without delay, do not act like a do nothing Congress.

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Political Contributions

Alaska Railroad Corporation - $300,000 to “unknown” assailant, possibly Charlie Koch or Joe Uselessbelli.

Board Rule No. 21 ~ Corporate Donation Policy
Alaska Statute 42.40.120(c)(3) provides that the ARRC Board of Directors (“Board”) must approve the donation of property or other assets belonging to the corporation. This Policy constitutes Board approval for the types of cash and in-kind donations specified herein. Requests for the donation of corporate property or other assets that are not specified in this policy must be submitted to the Board for approval. Requests must be provided in writing to the Board Secretary at least thirty (30) days in advance of a Board Meeting. 

• Political or religious organizations, activities, or causes • 

It is ARRC’s policy to donate train rides for the public at its annual Open House events and for its school business partnerships. ARRC’s President and CEO may approve other donated trains and passenger and freight transportation services on a case-by-case basis

If this money, in the form of a “donated freight transportation services credit gift” is an asset to KOCH, we have a state corporation that may be assisting union busting activities and the Alaska Railroad is a “Union”, workers beware! 

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Thursday, January 10, 2013

Alaska Lottery

Since Congress enjoys breaking the law, and Juneau doesn't understand what breaking the law is all about, I too am breaking the law, by starting an “Alaskan Lottery”. The proceeds will go to build new schools, with “safe zones” so our teachers can teach as intended and not be bothered with providing a safe and secure environment. 

So the 1st “Alaskan Lottery” quiz is as follows:

How long is the Alaska Railroad in inches?
Caution: No fair to ask Bill Sheffield, as it may cause a nosebleed!

Proceeds from this “Alaskan Lottery” will be used to build safer schools(like the Fire Island Elementary School pictured above) for our children!

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EXXON Valdez hard aground, loss = 10000000-gallons
~ Captain Joe Hazelwood
SHELL Kuluk hard aground, loss = 262-gallons
~ Captain "Ghost"

And Dear MSNBC's Rachel Madcow, are you getting your Alaska information this wreck from Shannon Moore? If so, find a better representative as “taxation” has “zero” to do with this grounding, it was contaminated fuel, a problem that SHELL has struggled with since last August! Don't believe me, just call the chief scientist at the Caleb Brett lab in North Pole, Alaska, at the Petro-Star refinery and ask them about SHELL's contaminated fuel samples of record that were “bad” and “bad” and “bad” then all of a sudden like magic “good” as the exploration season window of opportunity was closing in fast! And if the contaminated fuel were allowed due to political pressure - it was an election year and Salazar had given the “Green Latern” this venture - the flotilla's marine engines would eventually fail due to poisoned catalyst and because these engines are hi-tech, most likely shutdown as a precaution from high-temperature warnings just like occurred with the Aiviq, and without power ships are wrecked! And of course the EPA knew about this all along! But who in their right mind would want an assignment in “Dutch Harbor” when oversight can be conveniently handled from a cushion office in Seattle?

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Wednesday, January 9, 2013

I Stand Corrected

OK, I was wrong! The M.V. Susitna was not part of the SHELL rescue contingency plan to save the hard-aground “Kulluk” as previously reported on this blog. WHY? When company officials inquired about using the never used boat for this type of shore-line rescue operation - what it was partially designed for - the Port Authority that owns this taxpayer built rusting bucket said “What boat, the boat to nowhere”? And nobody in their right mind would or knows how to drive this amphibious assault ship wreck and the only one that ever applied for the captain of the helm position was a guy named Joe Hazelwood! 

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Alaska Railroad PAC

So what political action group is supported by the Alaska Railroad? OK, let me have my good friend Mr. Phineas J. Whoopee assist in explaining how the Alaska Railroad Corporation is stealing from the state coffers – basically stealing away your inheritance. Each year for the last 6-years or so, the railroad has received a check in the amount of $4.8-million for “qualified” railroad track maintenance, from either the Koch Brothers or Joe Uselessbelli. See, even though the Alaska Railroad is a “state corporation”, it it allowed secrecy which warrants suspect activity. Whomever it is that forks over this cash, they get to write off $2.4-million in Federal corporate taxes as allowed under Internal Revenue Code 45G which was most recently extended by the Biden & McConnell “Will Throw Some Americans Over the Cliff” compromise. Now for that tax benefit, as the entire 628-miles of track from Seward to Fairbanks is “assigned” over in efforts to utilize the tax shelter, at the same time the ARR tries to fool Uncle Sam into believing that we also use that already “assigned” track for a commuter rail system that brings people back and forth from work each and every day, so we can get another welfare check that amounts to $40-million. It's called the Alaska “Ghost” Train and goes so fast, it is very hard to see! Then the Alaska Railroad, still using an abacus to perform math with creative accounting skills know also as premeditated mistakes, well they offer the same tax evading entity that forked over the $4.8-million a $2.7-million customer shipping credit? So according to Phineas' 3DBB magical “Truth in Lending” board, Joe or the Koch suckers are freeloading $330K away from the state treasury, that's at least 3-jobs gone to hell in a hand-basket. So I am right, the Alaska Railroad is throwing away money that should be put to better use then “freeloading” as more likely then not this money is used to lobby against the “good” cause. Especially if the money that is secretly funneled in disguise as a “shipping credit” is going to the Koch dysentery dynasty. Even Joe has his loyal lobbyists, those trying to make Alaska a giant “open pit”! See, since it is a “State Corporation” the Alaska Railroad cannot use money for political reasons as that would disenfranchise and violate the neutrality of a state with respect to political choice. But I believe the ARR board of directors – that which includes Bill Sheffield – it may have found a convenient way to sidetrack loot for that purpose. With the shipping credit and the tax savings, it is above and beyond so must have an ulterior motive. Look, this is tax evasion and citizen deception, even if allowed through a loophole as that hole today is indeed bigger then the “Big Bang Belch” opportunity. But here is my take, who lets this continue on? Surely NOT “We the People”, but “We the Bastards”! 

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The 113th Congress

Wow! The “I do solemnly swear” routine this time around for the 113th Congress went a bit differently, maybe there is hope that the returning cast of misfits have learned from their 112th mistakes and maybe we will get our money's worth this go around – instead of the “K Street” lobbyists hoarding it all away. See, the “swearing in oath” was changed this year, as the previous oath didn't make sense – especially all that Latin jargon. It was not understood by the Congress, therefore they were all jumping that “cliff” of confusion trying to figure out how to behave. So for those that didn't have time to watch the “swearing in ceremony”, here it is the “NEW” Congressional Code of Conduct!

113th United States Congress ~ Code of Conduct
  • Share everything.
  • Play fair.
  • Don't hit people.
  • Put things back where you found them.
  • Clean up your own mess.
  • Don't take things that aren't yours.
  • Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
  • Wash your hands before you eat.
  • Flush.
  • Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
  • Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
  • Take a nap every afternoon.
  • When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.
  • Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
  • Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.
  • And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.
Thanks to Robert Fulghum for officiating this “NEW” Code of Conduct.

And “New” to the “House” for those that find dereliction their “sworn” duty, well during the recess came some interior design modifications that should help Congress stay on course: