Sunday Fodder

“Neither rain nor snow nor gloom of night nor crappy Alaskan like summers can stay these messengers about their duty." - the Anchorage Daily Stool shows up at my doorstep. And once again the paper has outgrown the plastic “crap” carrier as the Sunday edition is definitely a success story in that 2-pounds of “crap” in a 1-pound bag category - mostly ads. If one is board and looks hard enough, maybe some realistic journalism can be found amongst the ads. Instead of news with ads, it is just the opposite, so one must search for the journalism. Now the paper comes in this orange plastic bag that is recycled by dog owners to pick up Fiddo’s dog crap when out and about the trail systems. The only problem, people know it’s the law to pickup after their dogs but then think it is OK to just leave the “crap” bag for somebody else to pick up. I guess a “migrant worker’s” responsibility mentality! Some dog owners get creative and leave the “crap” bag hanging from a tree. When winter comes to an end and the snows melt, we have what is called the “Orange Blossom Special”. As places way far away like D.C. enjoy the cherry blossoms, we have all these orange bags filled with crap showing up, like the first spring flowers. Orange on rotting snow is very becoming. I think using the bags for crap follows what comes in the bags, “crap” journalism. Take this Question/Answer test that showed up in this Sunday’s edition of the Stool: PS, the questions are what appeared in the “Stool”, the answers are genuine mine as a counterpoint to what appeared in print.

Q: So why are the lawmakers in Juneau?
A: To waste time and money!

Q: But don’t we already have a pipeline? Why do we need another one?
A: Anybody that lives in this state and doesn’t realize that there exists an “oil” pipeline only should be denied the PFD.

Q: Three oil companies – BP, Conoco Phillips and EXXON Mobil – are the main owners of the North Slope oil fields and the Trans-Alaska pipeline. Why haven’t they built a gas line?
A: They use the gas to get the oil out of the ground, it is called tertiary recovery. At $135-dollars a barrel and climbing there is no natural gas available for transport. By the way, they own the leases, we own the resources.

Q: So who is TransCanada?
A: A company no different then Yukon Pacific that wants to get a permit and right-of-way and do nothing except sit on it hoping that “Big Oil” decides to someday sell some natural gas.

Q: If legislators grant the license, the welders will finally go to work on the gas line, right?
A: There are no welders available and the wages in the lower 48 will keep them down there for a long, long time! Maybe plastic pipe and glue will work.

Q: Who would the customers be?
A: Is this a fake question? The customers are the consumers, you and I.

Q: If TransCanada does sign up customers and wins federal permission, when might it build the gas line?
A: Never, there is no gas for them to transport!

Q: If the legislators give TransCanada the AGIA license, does this mean only TransCanada has the right to build a pipeline? And would the oil companies have to use it?
A: Once they apply for a ROW, there will never be a pipeline constructed, just like what happened in the Yukon Pacific case. This outfit, a subsidiary f CSX Corporation, held onto a ROW for a natural gas pipeline for 15-years, which was the only time there existed a whole lot of interest in building a natural gas pipeline from Prudhoe Bay. But because this company owned the ROW, it caused nothing to happen. Basically, they sat on it for a whole lot of time hoping that “Big Oil” would settle and buy the ROW. Big Oil is still laughing. Just ask Jeff the weed man about this.

Q: When will the legislators vote on the TransCanada license?
A: When Bill Allen gives the OK.

Q: What happens if they reject a TransCanada license?
A: Bill Allen continues a hero, and the CBC lives on.

Journalism: Bottom line, the only way a natural gas line will ever be built and do this state justice is by implementing an export tax. If the natural gas is transported in its natural state, the tax burden should be horrendous. If it is conditioned – like liquefied or manipulated through the “White Crude” process – then transported, the tax burden is decreased thus allowing the natural gas to benefit this state in the form of jobs. This state would be better off looking not at resource taxation that benefits the treasury but an export tax that sustains a jobs and workforce infrastructure – for the long run. This is a lessons learned by not taxing the heck out of the crude oil exported for the last 30-years. Had the tax burden been horrendous when the TAPS started up, this state would now have world-class refineries instead of a pittance of a royalty as resource income trying to make this state self-sufficient. We blew it. Now is the time to do it right. A raw products export tax is the only way to do it right. And this is what the oil companies would go for, as they make out big time in the corporate taxation scenario and we would have jobs for our children. Bottom line, that is what its all about, jobs and livelihood. With that in mind, we would not have to spend money – I mean waste money – on special sessions in Juneau.

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