Blueberry SPLATTER

OK, with Ted Stevens’ every move under the watchful eye of the Federal Bureau of Investigation AND Internal Revenue Service, maybe it means that honesty can find its way back to self-police spending away the Treasury. What surplus? That honesty thing for a long time was part of ethics, but every time renewal laws of ethics comes face to face before our representation, it is more of the same – nothing! So the word honesty really gets the point across. Except Bill Clinton banned that word through an executive privilege order. See, we were supposed to save for that “rainy day”, honestly speaking. We didn’t. The cost of the Iraqi war is crippling the economy. Its been going on now for 5 long years and John McCain would like it to go on for at least 95 more years, to make it the 100-year war blunder. So a vote for McCain to run the White House means by the end of the blunder, 80,000 kids will have been rested at Arlington and 600,000 will know what it is like to live a life crippled, statistically speaking. Sad, all around it is. And the fact that congress likes giving itself a hefty pay raise each and every year for work that is nothing more then grand theft arguing, no wonder the economy bailout will be inherited by the middle class working heroes of this nation - thy meek! Maybe with the present state of affairs, a pay decrease should have been instead. Just like in the real world of work ethics. One must prove one’s worth in efforts to be considered for a promotion or raise. Hey Congress, who does your performance appraisals? There is no freebie in the private sector. That is what irritates me along with a growing majority of the taxpayers. How can stupidity be such a common denominator when it comes to doling out money from the Treasury for “crap”? Now in Alaska, a lot of that loot that was supposed to be saved for that “rainy day” now upon us ended up padding pie in the sky projects that were most likely the brainchild of Bozo – basically originating from joke central. Take the amount of money that was slated then wasted during this war time spent on “berry” research. Right here in Alaska, the “Corrupt Bastards” state. First and foremost, the berries that grow in Alaska belong to the bears and mice. And the bears can have them. I have been here for many years and not once have I ever said “good stuff” to that purple “crap” that is preserved in a fancy jar. It tastes like mold, it has this yuck like texture, unless it is overwhelmed with a sugar fix. Purple sugar is all it amounts too. Bottom line, if you want jams or jellies that are the real McCoy just like grandmother made, go to the local Fred Myers and buy some decent stuff. If you prefer the organic stuff, it is available from the Cascade isle. Anyway, we start these projects that sound good when exercising our elbow reflexes but in reality it is most of the time wishful thinking. This state has failed at designing and implementing an infrastructure that is solidly self-sustaining. The fishing resources have been taken over by rich bastards out of Seattle. The oil was always a lost cause in our return on somebody else’s investment. So in efforts to catch up with the rest of the country, this state relied on the Three Stooges to bring home the bacon. I am talking Ted, Don and Frank. Now to keep it all in the family, Frank gave his failed position to MoanaLisa, his daughter the real estate expert. For a “penny” she was taught the rules of the land, basically rules are for others to obey. So as this state approaches statehood anniversary, just what the hell has billions of dollars spent done to warrant a berry industry? NOTHING. Sidebar: How come the “Honey Bucket” still exists? Now according to those that benefited from “pork” central giveaway programs comes this. “Wild berry harvesting will create thousands of jobs representing many millions in rural community revenue. The net result will be the transfer of millions in revenue directly to local Alaskan economies and the harvesters and landowners who provide the berries. Our company will create well paying, long term jobs”, all according to the spokesperson of some outfit called Denali Technologies. What kind of joke is this? A sick joke. And this is what was broadcast at the ribbon cutting ceremony for this fly by night outfit that received money from Ted, while Ted listened to this fraudulent speech about job creation. Millions in revenue? Thousands of jobs? I can just see it now in the statistics page of the Alaska Journal of Commerce, berry picking as the industry that employees the masses! I wonder if minimum wage rules for pickers? Maybe those that think they have a good idea should listen to the experts. When I lived in Valdez back in the late 70’s, an interest brewed about blueberry cultivation. The berries that grow in and around Prince William’s Sound were bigger then what could be found in the interior. The sugar content was higher, so these little blue devils tasted near and dear to the real thing, a blueberry! But an old timer cautioned this about that. He convinced interested parties that the culprit to a good crop was “mold”. With the right conditions, a good crop can be devastated to destruction, overnight. And it happened, just to prove this guy’s point. So the berry industry found failure just like the barley project. Wasn’t it mold that cancelled that project out? It was just like when Alaska spent all that money to bid for the winter Olympics back some years ago. Had we won, it would have been an embarrassment, as that particular winter we had hardly any snow. In fact dog crap made for bigger accumulation on the ski trails. And the old-timers warned us about that also, both the crap and bad snow. They were right. So it is hard to research just how much money has been wasted on this berry revival crap. And this excuse that Alaskan berries contain this whooping amount of antioxidants? Well you have to eat 4-Alaskan sized berries to equal a Maine blue. So what have we really gained with this childish advertisement, NOTHING again. It is all pure bull-crap. See how we progress? First came the crap, for Phase I project money. Then came the bull to continue down the road to ruins. To end, pure unadulterated “Bull Crap” that wastes away the Treasury. So when I see that the Fed.’s - through the kindness of Ted, Don and MonaLisa - continue to feed the pursuits of waste through secretive rituals to give away the taxpayers money and swear that it is their money to give away, I am speechless that these idiots have no idea what the Constitution was all about. Or freedom for that matter! So when I hear that money for berry research continues to invade the Treasury, I just want to have a good crap and remember to flush the “bucket” twice, as it is a long way from my home to their home. Oh, one last thing. In efforts to make berry picking meaningful, at least a road system is necessary. And where can one find a better place to pick berries - roadside wise - then the Dalton Highway? But I wouldn’t eat a berry grown anywhere near the pipeline right-of-way. Why? Yellow rain. See, all the human crap that is generated at a pumping station is supposedly incinerated in the hot exhaust of the pumping station’s turbines. But it doesn’t work all that well. So the crap is mixed with water and finds itself fertilizing the tundra, for miles and miles around a pump station – for 800-miles along the limited road system. Maybe that is why the berries grow so big! So I was concerned and amused when I saw berry pickers last fall along the highway in close proximity to the airborne “crap” source. And then we have the pollution from the Red Dog, where berries grow in mass quantities. Healthy? Think again. So this brainchild of the berry patch reminds me of another great project, called Auto-Genius, wherein some guy came up with the idea to squish a persons brain, in efforts to relearn things that had gone forgotten, another failed Alaskan pork fed project. But maybe now with ethics missing and the Corrupt Bastards part of Alaska’s culture, that brain squishing project thing finds revival, with plenty of crocks to test it out upon. So when the amount of money spent on useless projects, like for berries and not to forget the money spent to research the penis size of the male Musk Oxen, we do have a bumper crop mentality? Take that back, maybe more in tune to a bumper crap mentality, especially with those individuals that take for granted Ted and Don’s money bags. It is my money you are wasting! Oh, by the way, all that dog crap. Well it gets freeze dried over winter then mixes with melt-off and ends up at Point Warzonoff. From there it is discharged into Cook Inlet, just about the time the salmon are returning. Now remember, salmon stop eating when they enter the rivers. But when out in the inlet, they gouge themselves on that last supper. An old timer told me he would never eat fish that swim up the inlet, as that ain’t berries those fish are eating. Beware tourist! One other thing. The best berry patches close by to Anchorage proper were found at the BLM Campbell Tract area, off of Abbott. It was over growth from an old homestead trail. There existed blueberries, cranberries and rose hips, all for non-commercial pleasure picking. Not anymore. See Ted sent some pork this way to get rid of spruce bark beetle kill trees, in efforts to keep the Tazlina Hotshots working all winter long. Why? Because it is no longer a government entity but went privatized. So it gets pork to get by and we get porked again. To hell with selective harvesting as the woods were raped down mow me over fashion, just for dead tress, all because Ted didn’t do his homework once again, and again and again. And this year, again because Ted went haywire and sent more pork this way to police dead tress, Alaska made it on the list, once again, as to why American’s hate Washington! Accountability, maybe acceptance of such is as difficult as getting rid of the “Honey Bucket”. Bottom line, Alaska spent a good portion of that “rainy day” surplus for “crap”. And we have nothing to show for it but a scorecard of failures. How do I explain that to my kids’ kids and future generations, those that will pay dearly for waste not want not politics gone wild. Part of the buddy system I guess. A wind farm in Delta? Anything that relies on the Denali Commission for funding is just another failure waiting to happen.

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