“Rock of ages” mate Keef, my
bro and I thank you for that Yo-tuba “Tutorial” on a subject dear to one’s soul
music, that “Cremation”. We had no idea the fulfillment this procession recognizes,
what it can offer for our dearly departed. And so important the point you paint
it black, the earth finds a finite graveyard for rotting bones so green away
with bones to ashes. So after that education wherein the greatest rocker of all
times set the record straight on what this “Cremation” is all about, well time
to “Take a whiff, take a whiff, take a whiff on me, everybody take a whiff on
me hey, hey, baby take a whiff on me”! Maybe Woody with Lead Belly was on to
something this “whiffing” thing and with human ashes the new snort sport, the
sky’s the limit? See, me pop was incarcerated in this thing called “Hospice”.
When the MD defines your condition as “actively dying”, well the Sisters of Avalon
in Compassion want you to end the journey “peacefully” and in comfort. Now when
your body is deteriorating faster then a spawning salmon and bone spurs make
for pain but still a pulse and breath of life lingers on, well pain management
is what this “happiness” is all about. So the nurse pumps the “actively dying” patient
- by the way Keef how long have you been actively dying?...more “goofballs”
please and a side of sister morphine! Please go heavy on that “heavenly blues”
relief and replay that “Red is the Rose” for the trillionth time as when
snorting an ancestor, best play the appropriate music in heritage. OK, time for
Irish Rover! And to enhance the high, oxygen enrichment breathing masks. A marriage
made in heaven! Yesiree, as even the pharmaceutical stuff has street names for
what the death bed gets to enjoy “legally”. For real, this is all covered by my
insurance policy and if poor just call Mr. Medicaidcares? So me and me brotha
thought, well pop has been fed all these drugs the past few weeks and hasn’t
touched that ham sandwich, so ashes to ashes dust to dust reserve me a snort as
his body is saturated with sedatives, like pickling a cucumber. And this “burning
at the stake” was a better fit for pa, financially speaking. See he wanted one
of those mussolinis or whatever it’s called - but holy grail crap only the rich
can afford such a castle to rot away in. Now we have come up with a business
proposition based on what we learned from your “Tubber” wherein you make
mention snorting your dad’s ashes and getting off. See, we could set sail offshore
one of thum Royal Princess Cruise Ships, and all occupants bring along their deceased
friends, parents - pets allowed - ashes and we share lines. I mean, I mean this
could be the best thing since toasted bread with butter. So thanks for this
insight, what “Cremation” is all about and remember:
Take
a whiff on me, hey, hey, hey baby take a whiff on me.
Singing songs all night long, sing to my woman from midnight on,
Hey, hey, baby take a whiff on me.
Singing songs all night long, sing to my woman from midnight on,
Hey, hey, baby take a whiff on me.
Take
a whiff, take a whiff, take a whiff on me,
Everybody take a whiff on me,
Hey, hey, baby take a whiff on me.
Everybody take a whiff on me,
Hey, hey, baby take a whiff on me.
Where’s my snort straw? I
need a whiff for the Keef riff!
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