Insurgency”R”Us in Bloke-Land

Dear John(Sir Elton) & Boris(Son of Badenov);

Sad to hear that the Insurgency”R”Us has migrated outside the USA mainland and inciting moron riots in the Queensland. For that, I offer my utmost sympathy and condolences. Unlike what Donald Trump has offered up, that he is also sorry but offers no sympathy and I’s still having a tough time figuring that expression out, like a Mobius-go-round. Yes, “My Country ‘Tis of Thee” in its “Sweet Land of Liberty” still somewhat dizzy  by 4-years under a dickheadtator and a Do Nothing Saturday Night Live “shoot yourself in the foot” Congress. And the taxpayers still paid the bastards. But that Congress of ours that is supposed to act like a reasonable person, no different then when Eliot Ness found the entire jury seated to indict Al Capone and the sitting judge had been bribed by the “Crime Boss’ Syndicate”. I think if this happened in the Bloke kingdom, the Queen would issue a hanging edict right? Or at least Malone would have taken action! In any event…for real is Paul McCartney part of that British-Insurgency”R”Us-invasion? I mean he is calling Mick Jagger’s stonemen just a “blues cover band” when Paul was merely a “band on the run” band-aid after John and George found a better gig? And instead of making waves, maybe Paul should take a grammar lesson from Keith, learn all about “erudicate” not eradicate! And with the stabbing of that David politician a mess, maybe you should take Sean Connery’s words of advice and advise to heart; “They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue, the Chicago way!” But here in the states, we are preparing for another civil unrest war. OK, it has started in earnest and so far “We the People Proletariats” are winning, as we “fear not” this “nothing to fear” insurrection guided by a pre-mature ejaculation, orchestrated by a bunch of Eunuchs sucking up to a Dysentery Green Dynasty. I tell you, “fear not” but don’t put your Royal Guard down, get prepared. Like with the “Bloke” and how you built strong the UK, so the same with the “Proletariats” here in my homeland - we are one in the same bowl of chunder from down-under. I mean here in America, we are a divided nation in the way we see things, take age for instance. See, when a conservative ranking member of the GOP reaches a certain age, like mid-60’s, when that birthday comes they find wherein they must rename their pennis after a great dame, like Madonna, because it is the only satisfaction that erectile dysfunction will ever see futuristic wise. Yes, pennis envy is alive and well here in the states. Now “We the People Proletariats” are taking this coup d’état of Donald Jung-Un Trump with some seriousness, especially when on January 6^th the GOP Insurgency”R”Us was officially ordained, cheeseburger cheeseburger no Coke Pepsi! Because of this we are arming ourselves with WASP spray, as this cult behind the MAGA Moron bowel movement, like a swarm of angry bees or wasps, this stings our Democracy. And when that Insurgency”R”Us is mobilized in “force majeure”, upon approach it sounds no different then a swarm of angry bees masturbating as the intelligence level of the masses decreases to a divide-by-zero error, aka a mumble and in jumble it is just rat like noise. So you have at your disposal there in the Queen’s land this stuff called “Bee Bopper Wasp and Hornet Spray”. It comes in a convenient can, weighing in at 1-kilogram and has an effective spray zone of 6-meters and can be purchased, even by minors, for £2 and change. Cheap thrills protection and if you have to use it, if the Constable tries to bother you for “illegal use”, just say there were bees chasing you, case closed. According to the directions”: Bee Bopper Wasp and Hornet Spray - Beware of the wasp with an attitude! You know the one. He hovers above your head constantly, zooming in and out. He intimidates you, and he knows it. Well, he's asking for it, and he's going to get it! With Bee Bopper II you can knock him right out of the sky! And if you happen to know where he lives, you can follow him and his buddies to the nest and spray Bee Bopper from a safe distance.

So for cheap, arm your wife and children against harm from a home-grown Insurgency”R”Us courtesy of a Fork’n Moron surrounding himself by imbeciles, get a stash of Bee Bopper and bee-bop those Confederate blues away. This powerful weapon kills bees, wasps, and hornets and is guaranteed to take care of an “attitude”! Cheers.