Trojan Virus ALERT

Damn, I should have known better. Good thing it was an attack on my “junk” computer that acts as a “buffer” between the “wired to wireless” and that of my private parts! The same kind of buffer we find from “K Street” lobbyists, sheltering Congress from US. Sure enough, an E-mail was quarantined by my Internet provider with the option of “Open” if daring. But it was a correspondence sent over the “Tube” from the Office of Don Young – Congressmen for All Alaskans. So why for this “quarantine” action? I think he is pissed at me because I put out an APB - All Points Bulletin - in search of the long overdue Missing-In-Action M.V. Susitna – a hunk of junk wannabe ferry paid for by the U.S. Taxpayers in the tune of $70-million plus. Don was instrumental in getting the NAVY to build something they didn’t even want in their arsenal of “Amphibious Assault Vessels”. I guess you could say it is indeed an “assault” on the taxpayers, to get something that has no apparent value once the jobs go away. Do you realize it costs this state about $5-million a year to maintain the Pt. McKenzie port authority, and the only thing that goes on over there is keeping a light bulb lit? I guess as a search light for the MIA Susitna. In fact, now that the Kodiak Launch Facility has no rockets to launch – a.k.a. “Another failed Alaskan project Number 799 we still haven’t learned” - maybe we can use some of these mothballed waste upon the Taxpayers’ projects as target practice. And at Pt McKenzie, we could double the enjoyment, by taking out the “Port” and the failed Don Young Wood Chip Export facility at the same time - instead of New Year’s Eve fireworks! The “wood chipper” is that “eyesore” you can see from downtown Anchorage. Let’s see, we have the Anchorage “Port” authority, the Pt. McKenzie “Port” authority and the Alaska Natural Gas Pipeline “Port” authority. I do believe in these cases the “Port” has had an influence on any intelligent decision making. Talk about a bunch of drunken fools. And Bill Sheffield is the acting “Port” Captain Crook for the entire cast of pirates, unless under the influence a nosebleed! Anyway, I do believe Don is pissed and retaliated with the “virus” because I placed a “For Sale” add for the “Ferry to Nowhere” on E-Bay. Received a single bid of interest from an outfit running a garbage barge out of Coconut Grove, down Florida way. Anyway, this quarantined E-mail was of interest, so I hit the “Open Suspicious” key and that was the end of things, but entertaining. This virus posts a picture of Don sitting on Santa’s lap, asking for the “God Particle” and then when St. Nick explains that it hasn’t been discovered yet even though science has spent over $10-Trillion bucks for something that isn’t even defined on Wikipedia, Don goes foolish. A temper tantrum followed by a "Trojan Horse" attack hijacking what is left of your computer, by changing the “Administrator” password to "Imagod” along with the virus taking over the sound system, with Don’s voice in the background repeating, “You listen to me you rabid skunk”. Now I called Don’s office and the on duty Congressional aide – a sub-aide because the real office workers are MIA due the holidays – she was adamant that this was indeed Don’s Christmas present. What can I say!