Since Congress usually works only about 31 days total from when it convenes in January up through April Fool's Day, maybe they should just stay home until the 1st of April and make this day the official “Congress In Session” date. What other day could be more appropriate? So please send the following statement to your senator and congressmen(women):
Due the fact that the record indicates that Congress only works 31-days when convened in January of each year through the month of April, this edict demands that members of Congress stay home until April 1st, also known as April Fool's Day, and this day will from now on, unless called to order earlier by the President, it shall become the official “Congress Convenes” date. The 31-days taken early in the season shall be subtracted from that 31-days taken in August, so your pay shall remain the same. Furthermore, with the current stalemate before Congress, April Fool's Day seems an appropriate starting date for Congress and will instill confidence in the American public that Congress is indeed a joke run by a bunch of fools. The truth hurts, but what is going on hurts us more. Please take this change in “Convene” dates from January 5th to April 1st into serious consideration. Thanks, respectfully submitted by an American that can't be fooled!
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