Alaska Chinook: Senator Comeback

From the Old News is still Good News Diary:

Email For: Senator Con Bunde

Sent: Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Charge of the Right Brigade – Greatest Show on Earth!

I’s getting older, no doubt about it. So sometimes it is difficult to “eyes” the fine print. See, the entire TV guide comes hot off the press in the “fine” print, testament that editors have taken over where science has failed. Yes, it is possible to shove 2-pounds of garbage in a one-pound bag. Then again, maybe medical science maintains a foothold in this seeing-eye caper and it is a conspiracy orchestrated by the Optometry Guild. So I don’t bother to use the guide as a guide, as one doesn’t want to admit sensory defect defeat. Which means the only other possibility is to channel “surf”, wherein one basically watches nothing that makes any sense. It becomes a time-line of bits and pieces that doesn’t amount to Ben squat. Just like politicians in session. How is it that with all the hi-tech stuff these young technocrats come up with we are still held hostage by commercials? Anyway, I was about to watch a show called Antiques on the Road Show or Secrets of the Dead, whatever! Low and behold what was being received from the National Public TV broadcast. Now most of the time, reception is poor quality for this station, even though it is a digital signal from a cable that is supposedly free of noise. But I live in close proximity to the Christian Radio Tower that towers over Anchorage, so I am convinced that there is a transmission problem. And I can prove it because the radio in my vehicle behaves the same, when tuned to the National Public Radio station. “White” noise from frequency stomping makes it almost impossible to hear the weatherman tell which way the wind blows. It is a borderline illegal activity. But they get away with it, as it is consistent with the “Charge of the Right Brigade”, in efforts to destroy the separation between church and state. Anyway, back to the Antiques on the Road Again show. Damn it is good reception tonight! Again, at first I thought it was going to be either a show about old furniture on display or an historical about a sunken treasure ship. But to my surprise, surprise, surprise, it was Ted Stevens giving his “State of the Pork” address to the Alaska legislature, minus Ben and Tom. See, Tom is busy trying to raise money for his Defense fund. Ben, where is the little runt? Hey, it looks like he’s hiding behind daddy! Anyway, I was up for some entertainment, so I watched the Secrets of the Dead. Take that back, as Antique on the Road Again was still more befitting. It was the Greatest Show on earth, for the time being. Good “Old” Ted. This guy doesn’t give up as he tried once again to pull the wool. See, it is spring break, so the senators are taking another break. And they just had an entire week off for President’s Day. Yes, a whole week! It must have something to do with the senate chambers calculator. So with due respect to broken record “highlights”, Ted wants to make ANWR part of the “Strategic Petroleum Reserve”. Because he has failed - For how many years? - to get this place opened to oil exploration and exploitation. Thus in efforts to save face of legacy, he reaches into his bag of desperate tricks. This is beyond ridiculous, as there remain more then enough obstacles to even consider this madness. To include a “big” unknown as a national interest doesn’t make sense. Why? First, everyone must realize the effect the so-called “Reserve” has on the price of motor gasoline. Just the other week, George Bush decided it was necessary to increase the “reserves”, not in Iraq, but in the salt domes! This occurred for no apparent reason except that the price of oil was slipping to 4-year lows. Hey, is it any wonder that HailBurton stock has quadrupled since the “war” began! I hope this state doesn’t have any money invested in this company’s shenanigans, no matter how well this outfit is doing ripping off Uncle Sam. Anyway, it has a drastic effect, this “Reserve”. And most of the time with increases, decreases and exchanges of oil, it is just a paper ordeal. But it still effects the bottom line, as it means oil that was “paper” destined to a refinery is now “paper” destined to the “Reserve”. It shortcuts the supply and demand balance equation, the result being higher prices at the pump. So if Ted and Lisa were successful in their efforts to “Reserve” ANWR, just the fact that there is no existing infrastructure would cause the price of motor gasoline to increase, until such time that there was an infrastructure. It seems this is more in tune to a Don Young motor gasoline tax that is temporary forever! And “gas hydrates”? What is Ted thinking about? The natural gas that is trapped in the ice will remain in the ice, it is that simple. There is no feasible way to extract it. So to use the numbers that relate to the ice trap accumulations, as part of the U.S.’s “Strategic Reserves”, it is in-line to Alyeska’s so-called “Strategic Reconfiguration” blunder, wherein the costs overruns will be seen at the pumps! And isn’t it about time that the Denali Commission is exterminated? I like using that word – exterminator – as it seems that indicted Tom Delay is back in action, as the devil. Lets face it, what is the devils discipline? “No surrender, No Retreat”. So it is time past that the funding for the Denali Commission is done away with. We can do without it. What has this state gained from this program after so many years of taxpayer abuse? I have heard some of the horror stories, like free snow-machines for recreation. Sure there is abuse, prove me wrong. So I hope not for continued funds. But Ted’s doom and gloom speech seemed to be routed in “less” pork from the Pork King, it has a rhythmic reasoning. There is a protracted war going on that has so far cost billions! He doesn’t mention that at all. That is why many of us cannot stand this misrepresentation. It is spin designed to pass the blame for their failures upon the “other” party. Now Ted’s speech became the “Greatest Show on Earth” when Mr. Heckler invaded Ted’s domain to protest the “Iraq War” blunder. Ex-Pro Tempore went flabbergasted, even though the Daily Stool said he kept his cool. Did you hear what he muttered under his breath? Sorry, can’t repeat. So cool and calm composure was not what I witnessed, but then again, maybe it was my deteriorating vision. Except my wife, who has 20/20, she made the same observation. And I really get a kick out of the Daily Stool’s day after pill, wherein it mentions some individual named Con Bunde voicing a silly concern over Mr. Hecklers outburst. Sorry, I don’t seem to recognize the name! But since “silly” seems to have some affiliation with the lawmakers, I quote: “The issue is there is a time and place and show some respect for the process”. Well Con Bunde, the process has been given more then enough time, why not give peace a chance? I for one am sick and over-tired of seeing our young kids come home in a box! And then you ramble on as if by order the “Charge of the Right Brigade” or may it be you are suffering from explosive diarrhea: “He(Mr. Heckler) can debate his issues all he wants and has every right to his opinion, but to impose it on 60, 70 or 80 other people by jeering and screaming is completely inappropriate”. I believe we have been infiltrated by communists in “them there Juneau chambers”! See, it isn’t just a handful of people that this speech is intended for delivery, this is a forum for the citizens of ALASKA! It is not intended just for your selfish inklings. So it is evident that you people down there believe in prejudice upon the populace. This was probably the best forum to speak thy peace! I think I now know how Rosa Parks felt when day after day she walked from the back of the bus, during the days of segregation. I can just hear chambermaids like Con Bunde back then. “Sorry Rosa, this jeering over who sits in the back of the bus is inappropriate.” You are a chambermaid aren’t you? Isn’t Con short for Condalessa. Like in Rice! Now the best part of Ted’s speech came when he admitted that he had no idea that the “Patriot Act” was changed recently to allow Gordzilla to “fire and appoint” Federal attorney generals without Congressional approval. This is our Senator! I knew this shenanigans went on, and I work for a living! But I still have time to find out what is important. And I would bet my bottom dollar that Ted knows all about the earmarks and steermarks that sends more and soon to be less welfare to this state, one that has the largest oil fields in North America. So for a U.S. senator to not have an idea of what is going on in front of him, especially with respect to the “Patriot Act” and for an Alaskan senator to not be open to hear the voice of the people, I believe we have a case of sensory deception, that you see and hear only what you want, selective! Sounds like “Big Red” has been revitalized! And in the end, your “Charge of the Right Brigade” will fail!

Con Man’s Reply:
“What a rant! Apparently, volume plus quantity equals logic in your view. You must be mistaking me for someone who cares about your opinion.”

Writer’s Reply:

Thank you for such a quick response. May I have your permission to publish such? I will assume no response means no objection. Thanks once again.

Con Man’s Follow-up Reply:
“My reply to you was a personal response to your irrational tirade. If you would care to have an interview for publication, please contact me at 907-465-4843.”