Moanalisa
Dazed and confused I was this morning, as this darkness stuff at 7:00am gets harder and harder to understand. Must have something to do with age. But growing older has its advantage, especially in the “harder” category. Mature sex is way better then that first time! Especially when it is the same partner, after raising a family, college and all that stuff. So it is a warning to those thinking of quitting, through ease of divorce - stay together, in the end it will be worth it. Don’t quit! And I have this hat that says, “NO VIAGRA REQUIRED”. Really, a healthy diet is all one needs to stay young, fit and “Ready”! Plus, I encourage young couples to shy away from breaking up, in efforts to put lawyers out of business. See, if we could make the practice of law equal to that of a bottle washer, then maybe there wouldn’t be such an interest to pursue such a career. Then maybe we could get everyday “normal” people to run for political office. Doesn’t it bother you that every Ted, Dick & Harry political seat sucker is an “ATTORNEY”. Anyway, this dazed and confused thing occurred when I picked up the Daily Stool and realized that there was a new delivery person trying to find his way through the darkness. It must be the toughest job in the world! See, modern day paper people work from cars and trucks, as it isn’t just a sideline job for most. Not like when I was a kid wherein it usually meant biking it with a load of news, for a few pennies here and there. Can you imagine having to rely on a paper route to feed your kids? So I always give a decent tip. Nowadays, deliveries are thrown from curbside to save time – in efforts to complete the route so as to get home to feed the kids before the school bell rings. But the boomerang effect has a tendency to unravel the news. So it was the Sports section up front, as there was this headline clip about our very own Scotty. Seems he lost his way around the New York City subway system. Could be a beginning sign of Alzhiemer’s. Maybe from one too many head whacks. And when he came too his senses, he was surrounded by fans and guppies that wouldn’t let him free. Hey, this isn’t the Sports’ section, it’s the Headline News’ section. So what the hell gives? Isn’t there more important news to spread around then to be worried about a sport’s star getting lost only to be saved by his fans? The Daily never surprises me, with the layout and content. It is more like a comic book. But this time around I give the editor credit. Really, wouldn’t it be nice if this same kind of following followed around our delegation? Can you imagine one of your children saying, “I want Ted’s autograph”. Can you imagine Ted or Don alone on the streets, wherein they could smile and mingle with the voters? When is the last time you saw a smile upon our delegation? Lisa included? Bottom-line, the stick handlers garnish more respect then those that swear to uphold the Constitution. And why is this, because upholding the Constitution is upholding our representatives important business, like grand larceny upon the U.S. Treasury. Anyway, as of yet, I hadn’t had my first cup of coffee when I stumbled across another thing of interest in print, as today’s paper found the recycle pile. I don’t spend too much time with the hard copy edition of the news, as it is old by the time it arrives, now that we have been inundated with the internet and world-wide affairs available instantly in the comfort of one’s home theater. So this early morning interest came from a commentary by Elise. She is a regular Stool contributor. Now how in hell did I miss this? Good thing for the recycle pile. See, once upon a time there wasn’t a recycle pile around this house, as paper was used as fuel to heat the house and make funny pirate hats for the kids. That was OK, until natural gas came our way at affordable rates. That was OK, until Ben was awarded a board of directorship “wheel of a deal” with the Michigan based corporation that claims ownership to Enstar. Now the cost of gas is increasing at alarming rates – something like 100% per year. Somebody is getting rich over this new deal. Now I only read the first few words of Elise’s words of wisdom, as I was interrupted by a desire to puke. For those of you who may have also missed it, here it is. “Alaska has been blessed with a lot of one-name women who have made, and are making, this great state even greater. Lisa, Arliss, Ramona, Sarah.” Why in hell would one give credit wherein credit is not do by any stench of the imagination? What has Lisa done for this state? What has Lisa done for this country? Bottom-line again, like father like son and daughter, NOTHING. Lisa is no different then her father. And dad maintained a failure record for some 16-years in the Senate and resigned as a failure from politics when he lost the governorship to a pom-pom girl and almost gave away this state’s inheritance, the oil tax! His only fight during his terms of endangerment in Congress was to get ANWR opened. It didn’t happen and may never happen. So, how about that MoanaLisa fans! That is why the squabble over the Penny land deal – wherein Lisa found herself the beneficiary of a valuable piece of Kenai River property for pennies on the real dollar worth - was amusing, especially when everybody went upset over it. Come on now people, face the facts. We have political crooks all around us here in Alaska. It is a disease like practice. Did you really think that Lisa would be any different then the “Three Stoolges”, Ted, Don And Frank? And I always get a kick out of Bill “NoseBleed” Sheffield. Who does he represent, besides himself? This guy was a failed governor, because he didn’t know which party to suck up to. He is still trying to figure that out. It is so encouraging to have an airport named after Ted, and an unused train depot after the “NoseBleed” king. I cannot wait until this state is forced out of shame to rename both. In fact, we should try to sell the depot, maybe on E-bay! Hey, there is a moose out back. It is acting very strange, as it is a cow and this time of year brings the bulls a “courting”. Sure enough, a bull is following her around. But she wants nothing to do with the male in pursuit. And it seems as though something is wrong with the bull, so maybe that is why the aloofness attitude. The bull seems to be lopsided. Now I can see why. It has this odd looking bag hanging around its neck. It’s a radio collar. No wonder the cow is running, as that thing is gross looking and scaring the lady away. It is an unnatural burden, and nature wants nothing to do with it. Poor thing! Now there is a novel concept! Maybe we should radio collar all of our representatives, so we know where they are hanging out. And how about a GPS, so we can watch their every move. To see how they take to diminished freedoms. I had a cab ride with a cabbie the other day. Cabs are equipped with high-tech gadgets like a GPS, and it warns the driver when approaching an active “school zone” during that 20-mph routine. And it also warns the driver when being eavesdropped upon by Mr. Radar. So, maybe congressmen and senators should be provided with these devices. Now that brings up another novel concept. Why cannot constituents ticket our representatives when they don’t uphold the Constitution? Are not they supposed to be representing everybody? See, that is why our system of representation is so screwed up these days. Most Alaskan’s cannot stand the likes of Ted or Don or Lisa, but we vote them in because they bring home the bacon. Without bacon, we would have to stage another Boston Tea Party. But for the most part, they vote their desires and it taints democracy and the checks and balance fails. That is exactly what has happened in this country. Ted and Don, because of their time in office are more on the blame train then Lisa. But that is what upsets me more then ever, that Lisa is just a MoanaLisa. That same old painting. Tell the constituents what they want to hear, then go back to D.C. and do what Ted and Don demand. And do you really think that MonaLisa had no idea what her dad was proposing behind closed doors with “Big Oil” and the gas line initiative? Of course she had to know, as “Big Oil” owns also the Senate and House. It is a closed web of corruption. So, maybe the headline news should focus on sporters. And the fact that they also do business behind closed doors, wherein it doesn’t really challenge my well-being accept maybe raise the price of a sport-stand wiener. And even when behind closed door salary negotiations take place, at least we know this fans’ favorite isn’t sending young kids off to die in a ridiculous war and time after time saying they still support the blunder, and still support Tom Delay and still support Larry Craig and still support the most corrupt senate and congress that has ever set foot on the deck of the U.S.S. CONSTITUTION. The sacred ground has been invaded. It is under siege by crooks. Even the moose don’t like it. I’m getting a nosebleed!
Dazed and confused I was this morning, as this darkness stuff at 7:00am gets harder and harder to understand. Must have something to do with age. But growing older has its advantage, especially in the “harder” category. Mature sex is way better then that first time! Especially when it is the same partner, after raising a family, college and all that stuff. So it is a warning to those thinking of quitting, through ease of divorce - stay together, in the end it will be worth it. Don’t quit! And I have this hat that says, “NO VIAGRA REQUIRED”. Really, a healthy diet is all one needs to stay young, fit and “Ready”! Plus, I encourage young couples to shy away from breaking up, in efforts to put lawyers out of business. See, if we could make the practice of law equal to that of a bottle washer, then maybe there wouldn’t be such an interest to pursue such a career. Then maybe we could get everyday “normal” people to run for political office. Doesn’t it bother you that every Ted, Dick & Harry political seat sucker is an “ATTORNEY”. Anyway, this dazed and confused thing occurred when I picked up the Daily Stool and realized that there was a new delivery person trying to find his way through the darkness. It must be the toughest job in the world! See, modern day paper people work from cars and trucks, as it isn’t just a sideline job for most. Not like when I was a kid wherein it usually meant biking it with a load of news, for a few pennies here and there. Can you imagine having to rely on a paper route to feed your kids? So I always give a decent tip. Nowadays, deliveries are thrown from curbside to save time – in efforts to complete the route so as to get home to feed the kids before the school bell rings. But the boomerang effect has a tendency to unravel the news. So it was the Sports section up front, as there was this headline clip about our very own Scotty. Seems he lost his way around the New York City subway system. Could be a beginning sign of Alzhiemer’s. Maybe from one too many head whacks. And when he came too his senses, he was surrounded by fans and guppies that wouldn’t let him free. Hey, this isn’t the Sports’ section, it’s the Headline News’ section. So what the hell gives? Isn’t there more important news to spread around then to be worried about a sport’s star getting lost only to be saved by his fans? The Daily never surprises me, with the layout and content. It is more like a comic book. But this time around I give the editor credit. Really, wouldn’t it be nice if this same kind of following followed around our delegation? Can you imagine one of your children saying, “I want Ted’s autograph”. Can you imagine Ted or Don alone on the streets, wherein they could smile and mingle with the voters? When is the last time you saw a smile upon our delegation? Lisa included? Bottom-line, the stick handlers garnish more respect then those that swear to uphold the Constitution. And why is this, because upholding the Constitution is upholding our representatives important business, like grand larceny upon the U.S. Treasury. Anyway, as of yet, I hadn’t had my first cup of coffee when I stumbled across another thing of interest in print, as today’s paper found the recycle pile. I don’t spend too much time with the hard copy edition of the news, as it is old by the time it arrives, now that we have been inundated with the internet and world-wide affairs available instantly in the comfort of one’s home theater. So this early morning interest came from a commentary by Elise. She is a regular Stool contributor. Now how in hell did I miss this? Good thing for the recycle pile. See, once upon a time there wasn’t a recycle pile around this house, as paper was used as fuel to heat the house and make funny pirate hats for the kids. That was OK, until natural gas came our way at affordable rates. That was OK, until Ben was awarded a board of directorship “wheel of a deal” with the Michigan based corporation that claims ownership to Enstar. Now the cost of gas is increasing at alarming rates – something like 100% per year. Somebody is getting rich over this new deal. Now I only read the first few words of Elise’s words of wisdom, as I was interrupted by a desire to puke. For those of you who may have also missed it, here it is. “Alaska has been blessed with a lot of one-name women who have made, and are making, this great state even greater. Lisa, Arliss, Ramona, Sarah.” Why in hell would one give credit wherein credit is not do by any stench of the imagination? What has Lisa done for this state? What has Lisa done for this country? Bottom-line again, like father like son and daughter, NOTHING. Lisa is no different then her father. And dad maintained a failure record for some 16-years in the Senate and resigned as a failure from politics when he lost the governorship to a pom-pom girl and almost gave away this state’s inheritance, the oil tax! His only fight during his terms of endangerment in Congress was to get ANWR opened. It didn’t happen and may never happen. So, how about that MoanaLisa fans! That is why the squabble over the Penny land deal – wherein Lisa found herself the beneficiary of a valuable piece of Kenai River property for pennies on the real dollar worth - was amusing, especially when everybody went upset over it. Come on now people, face the facts. We have political crooks all around us here in Alaska. It is a disease like practice. Did you really think that Lisa would be any different then the “Three Stoolges”, Ted, Don And Frank? And I always get a kick out of Bill “NoseBleed” Sheffield. Who does he represent, besides himself? This guy was a failed governor, because he didn’t know which party to suck up to. He is still trying to figure that out. It is so encouraging to have an airport named after Ted, and an unused train depot after the “NoseBleed” king. I cannot wait until this state is forced out of shame to rename both. In fact, we should try to sell the depot, maybe on E-bay! Hey, there is a moose out back. It is acting very strange, as it is a cow and this time of year brings the bulls a “courting”. Sure enough, a bull is following her around. But she wants nothing to do with the male in pursuit. And it seems as though something is wrong with the bull, so maybe that is why the aloofness attitude. The bull seems to be lopsided. Now I can see why. It has this odd looking bag hanging around its neck. It’s a radio collar. No wonder the cow is running, as that thing is gross looking and scaring the lady away. It is an unnatural burden, and nature wants nothing to do with it. Poor thing! Now there is a novel concept! Maybe we should radio collar all of our representatives, so we know where they are hanging out. And how about a GPS, so we can watch their every move. To see how they take to diminished freedoms. I had a cab ride with a cabbie the other day. Cabs are equipped with high-tech gadgets like a GPS, and it warns the driver when approaching an active “school zone” during that 20-mph routine. And it also warns the driver when being eavesdropped upon by Mr. Radar. So, maybe congressmen and senators should be provided with these devices. Now that brings up another novel concept. Why cannot constituents ticket our representatives when they don’t uphold the Constitution? Are not they supposed to be representing everybody? See, that is why our system of representation is so screwed up these days. Most Alaskan’s cannot stand the likes of Ted or Don or Lisa, but we vote them in because they bring home the bacon. Without bacon, we would have to stage another Boston Tea Party. But for the most part, they vote their desires and it taints democracy and the checks and balance fails. That is exactly what has happened in this country. Ted and Don, because of their time in office are more on the blame train then Lisa. But that is what upsets me more then ever, that Lisa is just a MoanaLisa. That same old painting. Tell the constituents what they want to hear, then go back to D.C. and do what Ted and Don demand. And do you really think that MonaLisa had no idea what her dad was proposing behind closed doors with “Big Oil” and the gas line initiative? Of course she had to know, as “Big Oil” owns also the Senate and House. It is a closed web of corruption. So, maybe the headline news should focus on sporters. And the fact that they also do business behind closed doors, wherein it doesn’t really challenge my well-being accept maybe raise the price of a sport-stand wiener. And even when behind closed door salary negotiations take place, at least we know this fans’ favorite isn’t sending young kids off to die in a ridiculous war and time after time saying they still support the blunder, and still support Tom Delay and still support Larry Craig and still support the most corrupt senate and congress that has ever set foot on the deck of the U.S.S. CONSTITUTION. The sacred ground has been invaded. It is under siege by crooks. Even the moose don’t like it. I’m getting a nosebleed!
CopyRight 2007 – Dixie Productions/MSK Media/Eagle Rock Press @ Storylineonline@gci.net or Storylineonline.com
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