Blood Sucking Bed Bugs

I was hanging out at the Fairbanks’s Interbreed Airport when I noticed something that fell under the definition of “suspicious activity”. Since I was next to the “White TSA used to be customer courtesy phone”, I called in the activity. Wow, there is actually a live person at the end of the hard-wired land line out dated non-Twitter contraption! No robotic interceptor, but a real human. In no time flat an entire cast of TSA henchgoonites came swarming down to disrupt the American dream. Let’s face the facts as life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness has been banned from airports! And like a cancer, the shame appears to be spreading all across this land is my land is your land. I get the creeps when traveling by plane, because of all the surrounding security and the methodical approach that must be learned in efforts to take away the impression that all Americans are terrorists. And this “mission” bold may be coming to a neighborhood near you real soon. At the checkout counter, if one brings a smile onboard, that is an automatic for a TSA pat-down. If a smile is missing, that too brings an elevated frisking opportunity. It has to do with that facial behavior profiling crap. In the beginning, the TSA ranks came from the un-employed and when they were successful to find acceptance under the Federal Workers Union, well now it is becoming a high paid discipline, so is being invaded by out of work NASA scientist that have failed at finding the hole their whole entire life. Anyway, one must find a middle ground mug-shot when maneuvering the security switchback detail. And with that, it bothers me that I am being spied upon, and today it gives me the itch syndrome. But in this case with respect to the “suspicion” and of course fueled high by a little too much concourse vine wine contending with a late plane again, it was my duty to report the activity just like the loud lady advertises annoyingly every 5-seconds on the overhead loudspeakers! Is that really Nancy Pelosi’s voice? But it sounds muffled, like maybe a Botox overdose got in the way. Anyway, the “suspicious activity” was some whispering conversation going on between two state representatives in-line with political views of Joe “Exterminate the Constitution” Miller, Tea-Bagger candidate extraordinaire. They were plotting, as why else would they be trying to hide what was behind their stealth like conversation. They are our representatives - supposedly, or is it just a suggestion like a traffic red light - and it was early in the afternoon, so they were still on the clock. Talk about transparency missing in action. How come state workers’ work week is only 37.5 hours in duration? Whatever happened to the 40-hour workweek? And they get paid for the entire bundle, so it amounts to paid play and no work. I guess we learn from the representative body! Congress works none of the time and gets paid all of the time. Anyway, it was good for a false alarm laugh when the black & blue appeared as it gave them something to do, beyond the normal boredom, like feet checking and trying to decipher just what the hell appears on that x-roid screen. I place a fake dog crap in my carry-on, as it confuses the hell out of the sergeant at arms, and makes for a good laugh when they deem it necessary to check it out! And it appears that the TSA gang can use some exercise, so credit the false alarm as part of the TSA’s get healthy plan! The plane was late again, from Anchorage. I guess this 44-minute flight from Fairbanks to the Anchorage Interracial Airport – Ted’s Palace – is not included in the airlines’ gimmick game for on-time statistics “we care” false advertisement. Anyway, after the excitement, there came a call for early boarding? The plane’s late! Hey, why do grownups ask their kids if they want a spanking? I hear and see it time and time again. A kid misbehaving, because he sat in a dysfunctional Comeau school way too long and is just trying to let some energy escape, and from a little misbehaving comes the question from dad or mom, “Do you want a spanking?”. Of course not! Then came another delay in the already late departure of the plane, something to do with the 1st Class crapper clapper not working. And since those up front can’t use the peon class latrines, the crapper had to be fixed. But a flight attendant argued that it was flushing, OK? So what is with the delay? Then we found out the real reason, as there existed a vacant seat up front, and the plane was intentionally delayed, for another politician. What a load of crap. Then finally, the plane was given the green light. But that was quickly extinguished to amber alert, another security breach. See, somebody left a half open Pepsi bottle at the check-in counter. And that was “suspicious activity”. Wow, TSA was really getting a workout today. In fact, the guy that was now being treated like a criminal was asked to provide a receipt, that the soda was purchased behind bars and not something that was a sneak in, through security. What an embarrassment. So finally we were in the air. Why is it that those on the starboard side of the plane are still trying to see Russia from here? That gives me the creeps also. But that itch I was talking about earlier. it ain’t from the confinement confusion from too much security. No, it’s from bed bugs. See, people sleep at the airports. People sleep in planes. And bedbugs like to travel. So the reason that lady across from me is itching her nylon plastered legs, it’s from bedbugs! And that is what the authorities are not telling us, that the recent “bedbug” scare across America, found in hotels from the mountains to the prairies to the oceans, the seed for this invasion came about by travelers. Look, remember when mice were found in a plane, because there was this cache of food staples? Well, planes have plenty of food for the tiny blood-suckers, human skin and dandruff! Damn, another good name for politicians, the blood sucker that is! Look airlines didn’t get rid of the blankets because of a swine flu scare! It was from early detection of airborne bedbugs, coming to an interracial airport near you. From the legislative halls of shame, we see epidemics, as the fodder of a failed American is providing a wealth of embarrassment for a feeding frenzy, and we suffer more this apocalyptic attack by politicians then a plane of 120 humans in competition with over 10,000 bedbugs! This country is bleeding, due the blood-suckers – which today include the rich, the wealthy influential and the coward landlords, a.k.a. Congress that is supposed to protect the Constitution. But the Joe Miller brigade will do nothing to ease the pain and suffering. What is needed is a Reaction Revolution, without guns. If all hourly workers united and reacted through walkouts, to revolt upon essential things like a decent wage, decent health care, and wherein CEO’s were no longer awarded huge allowances to run corporate America to ruin, then we may be able to wave the flag of glory once again. It is still today the middle-class wage earner that is keeping this country afloat. Unfortunately, we have competition from those that want to destroy all we have worked so hard to achieve. And when an airline robs me my precious time because some high ranking idiot hides behind a state seal, we are being shorted the trinity of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, the things of equality, which is really what this country should be all about. So send in the bugs. And as far as Joe Miller representing this country in Congress, it is the climax of the doomsday scenario, but we have been in that mode of destruction for a long, long time by now from a decrepit deceptive government and it goes to show that the forefathers didn’t realize that Congress may have been a good thing then, but now it has become the ship of fools and maybe we would be better off having bedbugs making the laws. As for the bugs, blood-sucking is a form of survival, but for politicians, vote sucking is just their way of greed survival to have a job of nonsense that requires less work hours per week than any other job on earth, provides for the best of health care, provides for the best of retirement plans, but produces only hate and discontent which is about to topple the future of what was once the nation of “Brotherly Love”. I learned that from my Grandfather, an Irish transplant. I learned that from my father, an Irishman’s son. But what do I have to teach my Irish son, besides the fact that blood suckers have taken over! And in my book, Sarah is not a barracuda but a leach. Joe Miller is not a judge, but a freak show fit only for a WWF match. Beck? What can I say, except idiots are alive and well. And these snake oil preachers, all taking a free ride on the draining American spirit! Maybe it is time for a redefining of “terrorists” as it is indeed “suspicious activity”.