Bad News Bear

Once again, with the mediocre and luke warm news' coverage upon important issues here in the “Last Frontier”, that coverage never tells it like it is so these “important” things fall by the wayside their true identity crisis – the true meaning of what is really happening around the state goes underground. Importance finds impotence. And these are the issues that should have front and center attention – instead of an on-line 2 seconds claim to famine. Look, read the writing on the drill bit's bore hole wall, Great Bear is a bust! With the best time of year to drill, to explore, this outfit that wants to bring shale relief to the Trans-Alaska-Pipeline, it's a so far “BUST” and Mr. Duncan is closing down the operation for the season. Is Hailburton involved in this venture? How much does the Cheney Estate plan to make on “Frac Chemical” sales? Look again, as in North Dakota, wherein the infrastructure is still prehistoric and Neanderthal like, where roads are few and far between, where rough-neck camps find gender harassment like occurred during the construction days of Alaska's one and only successful project – the one the state stayed away from – well in that neck of the woods a shale well can be producing in 45-days. No pipeline, and like already mentioned roads that are sub-standard and not to mention parts and materials in short supply - wherein a sheet of plywood can fetch $200 bucks - even if used! No wonder some of Alaska's oil & gas companies are running that way – something is happening and delays are not an option! As we spend years planning, others are acting – which means we loose out again. How many years has a natural gas pipeline been in the planning stage here in the “Lunatic Frontier”? So this delay tactic with shale development on Alaska's North Slope, it is based out of the fact that Great Bear is embarrassed to tell us the truth and nothing but the truth so help me Sarah! The rock samples suck and indicating not only a dry hole, but traces of past hydrocarbons are missing. And this is a venture that has road access and a pipeline to market just a few feet away already. Talk about the carriage ahead of the horse! So what gives, maybe somebody - like a spy - must have held the seismology charts up-side-down or maybe the GPS was out of calibration and “X marks the spot” was a mistake. Get the picture, as “Big Oil” employs spies, to infiltrate and when “in” it is like a bad virus on a network – shit happens! It's a “BUST”, always was and always will be. See, any newcomer on the “slope” should realize one all important thing. If “Big Oil” isn't doing it, that is the main reason to stay away from it. Case in point: Pioneer Natural Resources is still 4-years behind predictions in getting its Oooguruk Island prospect up running to a production goal that was once upon a time an interest to the stockholders. Why the failures so far? These were leases that held the majors' oil exploitation interests many years ago, like EXXON and ARCO, until the geologist said “stay away”! Sure there was oil in them thar samples, but too damn expensive and risky to stake it out. So “Big Oil” let the leases lapse, then along came....The only reason PNR has not packed up and moved south, it is called “Royalty Relief”. Yes, the state is very lenient this venture, as it was supposed to be the saving grace for the Palin then Parnell legacy, in efforts to fill back up the TAPS. I'm still laughing and you should be also, as this was indeed another “pipe dream” come true! What the chumps in office failed too see, the pipeline owners have reconfigured that line and it can no longer handle what it once pumped. The Golden Goose days are over with! Matter of fact, Dear Sean, how many pumping stations have been mothballed? Don't hold your breath that we will ever see again 2-million barrels a day coming south – once again said with sadness, the golden years are behind us! Now take that royalty relief away from the Pioneer, and this outfit will be out of Dodge faster then Great Bear has ceased its drilling operation for this season. A dry hole can get creditors moving towards insolvency in high gear. Didn't we hear the same damn lame excuse from Big Bear's Duncan same time last year? Stockholders beware is my sentiment. And how many times is it going to take to get it right? I am talking the snow-slides of Turnagain Pass taking out the overhead high-voltage electrical lines. Once again, the electric utility must secure money from the legislature for repair work. Good thing the concessions begin in January – no not a typo as the “In Session” is nothing more then a vacation for these erectile dysfunctional officials away from their families. And this “power line failure”, it happens every year – like clockwork right around Christmas time – maybe something to do with overtime pay. And it ain't rocket science here, traversing rugged country with poles and wire, to light up the Seward “Red Light” district. Look, we have overhead lines going through “Thompson's Pass” - talk about a nightmare! We have a rail-belt grid, with power lines going through “Hell's Canyon”, yet these erections survive the brutal Alaskan winters - time after time after time. Once again, we set our priorities on kindling, and like a broken record, we hear it again and again and again. Where's the power? Sad, as if we decided to do it right the first time, like every other respectable state, we would be way ahead of things. That saying, “Do it Right the First Time”, is but a suggestion here in the 49er, just like a traffic light. Fortunately, we can only place blame upon our legislatures, as they require us do things akin to a 3^rd world state – and well known today is the fact that the band-aid approach is a wasteful approach. Can they really be that “dumb”? I hope NOT. So it ain't out of stupidity, as we have the money, we have the knowhow, we just have this inkling to fail. Like this is what it's all about. Failure! The same with the “Oil Taxation” debacle which is once again a center stage duke-out down in Juneau – about to go ballistic when the erectile dysfunction caucus meets again in January. See, why does Pioneer enjoy “Royalty Relief” at a 5% discount, when right next door to the Oooguruk Island Piss Ant settlement is a Conoco lease that takes in 16.5% royalty for the state coffers? In simple terms, that's why “Big Oil” is doing nothing extra to help out this state. Think about it, as for every $100-dollar barrel of oil sold today, “Big Oil” pays their way at $28 a whack and the little guys – still crying in front of the ED caucus – hand over how much? Yes, 1/8^th that amount. No wonder “Big Oil” gets pissed! So that is what it's all about today on the Alaskan scene, an unfair system that is strangling the very effort that could and wants to do more to promote continued interest on Alaska's North Slope. Not Big Bear, Not Pioneer, Eni or Rasputin Blow Out Specialty Company, it is “Big Oil” that was and is the saving grace of this state. We must start to cater to “Big Oil”, or else we will continue to see more of the same stagnation. Look, had we been fair, when the state decided to go where no respectable state official had gone before and offered the “slime line” relief, “Big Oil” would have already built a natural gas pipeline from Prudhoe Bay to Anchorage, to feed any shantytown in between with affordable energy. So Big Bear has no intent on ever striking it rich, but holding out in efforts to smooze the legislature some more – for what is still in the jury hands. But we all know it will have strings and $$$ attached! In the end, this mentality stabs us right in the back. Big Oil is here to stay, but only if we are fair. Today, with the ”Independents” moving in, crying and getting their way, we continue to loose out our resource wealth. Here it is in a nutshell. Give “Big Oil” a break like the “Independents” enjoy – by lowering the royalty on legacy wells! Give EXXON, British Petroleum and ConocoPhillips the same aadvantage we give Joe UselessBelli and instead of high theft royalty and taxation out-of-bounds due preferential treatment, how about lowering the take to the state to the same margin enjoyed by the mining interests – like 3%. Or like the Prego Mine, 1.5% take! Look, we are giving away our gold at Macy like bargain basement prices. Look, we can do without the PFD, as if we give in to a lowered royalty to the oil industry, that in itself will create thousands of jobs and that should be the numero uno reason that wakes up the giant, wherein even though we have failed miserably the last 35-years to succeed at a solid and sustainable jobs infrastructure – we owe it to ourselves to get it right, right now without haste. Even if it means giving in to “Big Oil”. They have the know how and they have time on their side – we don't. And maybe while we are at it, ask them to build some power lines through Turnagain that last, believe me they could get it done and we would never again hear about failure and the Red Light districts would flourish once again. Bottom-line, the way this state orchestrates things as was done yesterday, today and the future could see the same damn pathetic reasoning, good thing it is on the wings of a legislative giveaway program - as no viable business could get away with it. Yet the freeloaders think that this state is desperate and will do anything to entice, yes more erectile dysfunction when it comes to legislation that benefits from the latter.

Meals for Freeloaders?

Dear Mr. House Speaker Mouthpiece John “Tan Man” Boehner;

Thanks for cutting short your holiday tanning booth schedule for an early return back to the “Beltway”, in a last ditch effort to avoid the “fiscal cliff”. I am all for your last offer put in front of the Obama team just before Happy Hanukkah. Keep fighting for this plan, don't compromise, fight to the finish! See, the other day being the day before Christmas, I visited my aging parents and came to the conclusion that you are right on, that we must cut that “Meals on Wheels” program afforded our elderly - as it is just too wasteful and goes against the grain of free competition. The aging population that relies on this “Freeloading” food giveaway program, they can eat cold porridge along with cold hamburger helper and take a trip to McDonald's once a week for a night out on the town. Mind you, having such an extravagant program, at the U.S. Taxpayers' expense! And most of the clientèle that take advantage this ridiculous food welfare frenzy, most of the men are war veterans and most of the mom's, well they “manned” the factories during the war time - so they are all used to fending for themselves. The other bad thing about this program, the drivers are volunteers, and this takes away from the spirit of free enterprise – it hurts local business. Now arming them instead of feeding them, that has merit and goes along with your parties fascination with assault weapons from birth. They may need to fend for themselves from rambunctious moms & dads trying to feed their kids, as when you get rid of the other food welfare programs - like that free lunch at our schools - we are then headed down the right track for fiscal responsibility. And maybe that should be the ticket. See, we can grade family men on how they provide food for their families. If they fail, they loose their right to vote. While at it, just take away a “woman's” right to vote, especially if over the Hillary plans on running! Once again, all in line with the GOP plan of attack to keep America decent. So thanks again, for being so considerate and proving to us all that you are America's most despicable representative ever to set foot in the Congress. My dad, a veteran, would like to go one on one with you over your plan to cut the “Meals on Wheels” deal, age is not a barrier, so please take this into consideration - unless you are a true American coward! My dad waits for your acceptance! Your “eight days” only as a NAVY man should be not a disqualification. Imagine, you hold the record for the shortest “military career”, so maybe your attacks against programs of necessity and warranted as a reward upon our parents' time engaged in combat to protect this county's freedoms, maybe your disdain is fostered from your own “failures”. Despicable representation is your “Code of Conduct”. Again, my dad waits your answer for a one on one in the ring with boxing gloves! What you mean you can't hit an old man? Your elimination policies hits them right where it counts! And Mabelle, just up the street and in her late 80s, she wants to “whip” your water-boy, that Eric Cantor “snot” - as she calls him out. In fact, they would entertain a “tag team” match - are you game?

HI NORAD

Since the “Cold War” has simmered down because Russia went tired of babysitting the threat of Sarah Palin's Alaska and the “Yellow Cake” scare was just another GWB wet-dream, NORAD has been bored. I think it stands for No Organization to the Right Assists Democracy. No wonder Laura slept in a desperate bed for eight years, as George was always peeing his pants – one of those unknown attributes of the 43^rd President – I meant “A town in Texas missing an idiot”. In my book and contrary to what the encyclopedia of today promotes, wherein this book of knowledge starts off with respect our past presidents with a full blown mugshot so we can teach our kids who not to associate with or take candy from – like an APB for the “Most Unwanted”... What you mean they stopped publishing the presidential mugshots following Dubya's raid on the White-House? Now I do believe George has returned to that wacko town, so this meaningful saying with respect to that town's “lose” is not so any longer. Our gain is their lose, haha! Really, the main reason George refuses to write those memoirs is based on the embarrassment over his uncontrolled “peeing” episodes and also withstanding the fact he would freak out when a stogie stubby – cigar left over from Bill's Clinton's clandestine affairs – went discovered in the Oval Office. And the only design as of yet for a “GWB Presidential Library” that excites the architectures comes in the shape of a diaper! Anyhow, with the “Cold War” boredom, NORAD finds other things to entertain its $extravagant$ eavesdropping operation – located in a bat cave somewhere in Wyoming – close to the whereabouts of Dick Cheney. And today, the “Big Screen” TV's that provide a panoramic view of the globe for the men & women responsible to observe peculiar activity, with an eye out for UFO sightings including wayward bullets from Dick's hunting expeditions when Mr. Yellow Cake thinks that buddy's face is a ruddy duck - kaboom - well the spies were following the movement of none other then good'ole St. Nick. Way to go! Which means Jewish kids could call the “HI NORAD” hotline too see when to light that fire in the chimney. Imagine, this outfit with high-powered sophisticated radars can track an imaginary character! Must be some damn good technology the spies have at their disposal. When storm Sandy attacked Chris Christie's “Big Mac”, the pictures of the storm's aftermath provided by a 3^rd party custodial, well those 4x5 glossies were pretty damn precise, as one could see the sesame seeds on those buns blowing around in the winds of destruction. What you mean that stuff ain't real seeds and just a figment of one's imagination – trying to play games with reality that in truth there isn't anything healthy in that “crap”? But those pictures were fascinating, as to what can be seen from way out yonder in outer space by robot like satellites. And this is outdated technology that goes up for sale to interested wannabe spies, that use this technology to promote “home grown amateur porno”. Look, don't stand naked in your window or you might find yourself on YouBoob! But being able to follow the man with the big bag of toys as he gallivants across the globe, well this underground outfit NORAD may have some kind of uncloaking device, to follow the whereabouts of Santa and his herd of reindeer under the influence – the “Red” nose thing. Now why not put this hi-tech eavesdropping stuff to some genuine full-time duty, like following the members of Congress. Talk about “crap”, had this technology been in use when Mike Crapo went drunk, maybe there would have been one less drunk driver making our roads so unsafe. Imagine, a guy that is sworn in to uphold the Constitution, drinking then driving! What red light? See, let's entertain ourselves by following this crime scene to see what Congressional immunity does for these elected officials. Honestly, all the “Crap” man must do is convince that Virginia judge assigned to his case the argument that he was on “official” business and the immunity clause kicks in, which gives preferential freedoms to members of Congress for everything – including freedom to rape – so we may see this guy get off “Scott Walker” free - which means in celebration another victory a whole bunch of workers may get furloughed. I bet those cops are running scared! Bottom-line, we may see yet another member of Congress committed to a crime but getting away with it without any penance – as a deterrent. Just like has occurred with Tom Delay, a convicted felon yet still a free man today down in Texas, as we all know that in the cowboy state it is the color of one's skin that may forfeit one's freedoms. So on January 4^th, U.S. Senator from Tea-Party Potatoe Land – a.k.a. Idaho – will go on trial, just a few days before the Supreme Court swearing in of the 113^th Congress. Stay tuned, as we may see more of the same insane allegiance from our representative body as we have come accustomed to – a do nothing Congress that doesn't give a rat's ass attitude about anything except screwing us over and over again - as they all would fail a congressional sobriety test as they are drunk as skunks and cannot kick the “lobby” habit with hangover! Wow, it works! I just received a call-back from NORAD, that Santa was shot down over North Pole, Alaska, when just trying to take a work break with pay – by a guy in camouflage and equipped with a bazooka and yielding the flag of the Tea-Bag party. All I want for Christmas, well how about a Congress that works “For the People”, NOT “Against the People”!

Dear MoanaLisa

Dear MoanaLisa MurCowpie – U.S. Senator of Alaska

It has been reported by reliable sources outside the “beltway” the following: “A landmark Environmental Protection Agency report concluding that children exposed to toxic substances can develop learning disabilities, asthma and other health problems has been sidetracked indefinitely amid fierce opposition from the chemical industry. For the first time since the ACE series began in 2000, the draft cites extensive research linking common chemical pollutants to brain damage and nervous system disorders in fetuses and children. It also raises troubling questions about the degree to which children are exposed to hazardous chemicals in air, drinking water and food, as well exposures in their indoor environments – including schools and day-care centers – and through contaminated lands.” Very troubling both the bad newswire and the sad newsreal, that the report has been hijacked, but we understand that you are adamant at increasing the EPA's oversight upon our environment and also in favor of reversing the trend, fostered by your colleagues in favor of demolishing the EPA. So thanks, for standing up for what is right and making sure this report makes it out to its intended audience ASAP, and regulations that protect our children over the wealth of the chemical industry are tightened. We know you are behind US, to make for a safer environment in which we can be comforted when raising a family. I mean, this is what a member of Congress is supposed to do, and you seem to be leading the way forward wherein your colleagues have missed the boat – with increased protection rather then a dereliction your convictions wherein we would suffer otherwise the consequences. Thanks for standing up for the environment and taking to task your opponents bent on getting rid of the oversight responsibilities of the EPA, the government entity that still cares about our well-being - as it appears it may be the only thing Congress is still concerned about, due in part your efforts to make sure we are not bullied into submission by Mr. Clean. As you are well aware, when our children are at risk, we need representation like yours to make sure the “lobby” does not interfere with righteousness. Thanks again and my family sends thanks also, as do the thousands of children hospitalized and losing hair, losing eyesight, losing limbs or limbs stunted from birth due unwanted chemicals entering the environment. On your watch, we feel that sadistic trend of “industry wealth” over “citizens' health” will be but a bad dream of the past. And “Happy Holidays” as we feel much safer knowing that you are not one of those idiots trying to tear apart the agency still in good standing the American public and so designed to protect our well being when it comes to attacks by the chemicals industry. Have a healthy day!

Cheap “Chenault” Thrills

Wow, today marks a milestone for Alaska. NOT a Merry Christmas in my vote, this sad dark news day that comes along in harmony with the diminished daytime light now that winter is upon us – and it's only December! Some state official in the know out there in voodoo child land, please answer me this without a smirk. Was the Mayan calendar talking about the “End of Alaska”? OK, on a more important subject of concern, are we already digging into that energy reserve, that underground storage of natural gas that wasn't supposed to be used until at least late into January, as a last ditch effort to keep us warm? Who in hell is this Helicorp outfit anyway? And why do the CEA rate-payers have to pay for subsidized electricity for Fairbanks? When is enough truly enough? I don't mind helping out, but when a coop CEO thinks he's worth $400K a year, on our dime, something is wrong – maybe the permafrost goes deeper then we think - wherein brain-dead finds true respect and meaning! And wait, there's more as ever since Enstar was stolen away from Seagull Energy by a Michigan based outfit that had to hire Ben Stevens as a consultant when he was still sworn in as an Alaskan senator, well you get the point. Trust is gone. Can't we get anything right? Have we failed the “Statehood” test? See, there was a gas shortage possibility a few years ago for southcentral. Then when talk of a gas line south from Prudhoe Bay started to scare the gas producers in Cook Inlet, as that meant an end coming to their lucrative gas for sale profits due the premeditated gas shortage threats, all was soon fine. Someone said, why not do what normal states do and put to use an old abandoned oil cavern to store “excess” natural gas, that which can be purchased on the cheap in the summertime. So buy it cheaper when there exists an excess, compress it, store it, then when it is needed - whala a reserve of low cost natural gas. So the Arctic Fox natural gas pipeline was shelved, because there was no problem as overnight we suddenly had plenty of gas. That line - had it been built - it could have been delivering natural gas to Fairbanks, right now when it is -40F and the air quality is causing cancer! And that my friend would have ended that subsidized electricity we friendly southerners provide for our northern neighbors – and your power rates would have been lowered considerably. Groceries would have lowered in price, along with everything else in and around town – except political contributions. See, that line was the brainchild NOT of corrupt politicians, but from two guys that knew what they were talking about, so it had no traction as without the label of “corruption”, those idiots down in Juneau don't know how to act! One thing I learned from attending negotiations that pipeline, if there ain't nothing in it for a politician, it's NOT a reality. Now, the predictions are dire straits all over again, because we are no closer to a natural gas pipeline today then when we were 10,000 years ago – when the Eskimos could see Alaska from Russia and went on an expedition. And because the price of natural gas has tanked, so has the prediction of not to worry! The inlet gas producers are in a panic, not because of the supply, but due the fact that the bottom is dropping out on the natural gas market and they are just practicing being sore losers all over again. So look for “shortages” to shore up their invoices. Hey, they got to pay for Ben's consulting work – a product with a bunch of pages “Intentionally Left Blank”. Maybe we were blinded by the might to believe what they tell us in efforts to find some self-centered relief, it is only comic I am convinced – this relief that keeps on coming from the political orifice. Talk about a pandemic of Explosive Diarrhea, no wonder the sunlight never penetrates the Juneau skyline! So chalk up another for the 49er, in the category of “Failed Again”, as government funded project 434 is now a reality and falls right smack in place where it so belongs, like all the rest of the projects that never should have been – finding now that stamp Not of Approval, but “Failed” written all over it! Instead of the “Last Frontier”, how about “The Failed Project State”, as it finds more meaning today then a frontier spirit. See, I have been keeping count the failures and it is very discerning – beyond the rage stage! Damn, 434 means a failed project for every U.S. representative – maybe that is something worthwhile, a namesake for every single wasted project funded courtesy your's truly - US! Now that's a Christmas present to colleagues Don Young can be proud of - “Failure”, as it goes hand and hand with our Congress! Here's the take, we pay for 100% of these projects through taxation yet see only 33% in return the value of that project, the rest is swindled away. And then being of no use, it is auctioned off for pennies on the dollar, so we enjoy even less of a benefit then the meager expectations of something worthwhile “so lets go for it” mentality. That is why it has failure written all over it from inception, these prized wet-dreams from our legislative branch. Sounds too good to be true, it is, but so what! Good thing the oil giants don't work like this, as if they did, conglomerates like EXXON would be but a thing of the past. I guess for some that would be a tiding of joy. And I must add this fact of clarity that all is not a lost cause, as that “Return In Value”, well down in the lower-48 because there comes some semblance of ethics in governing when it comes to “earmarking” loot for projects of value, that percentage finds acceptance in and around 78%, so we see not total waste and failure. Why so, because projects in the lower-48 are orchestrated for reasons of necessity, not just for the “construction” jobs, but based upon what comes after completion and the concrete forms are put away, ribbon-cutting commences and doors open for business - is the project worth it? What does it do “For the People”, besides a handful of low paying construction jobs that are supposed to pay “Davis Bacon” wages, yet that “extra” is stuffed away by some guy claiming to be a friend in good standing Don's WAR chest. Talk about a ribbon cutting ceremony with champaign, I still get a laugh when MoanaLisa MurCowpie and Parnell were down in Ketch christening the M.V. Susitna, it looked for real – with the harbor like backdrop and the rotten weather. But that hull was a mirage, as it is still a No-Show and we were left with a big bill for that nothing – in the tune of $70-million! But here we go again, in the “Failure” archives here in Alaska. See the $40-million dollar “Head House” operated as an experiment by the Fairbanks chapter of the USDA will go on the auction chopping block because it is broke, another useless project that was a failure from the get-go - just like the Don Young wood-chuck facility, just like the Delta barley projects, just like the M.V. Susitna, the list goes on forever and gives anyone with any sense of Alaskan “Survivability” pride a “Head House” headache. I was in a conversation with a local banker that has followed the Alaskan investment scene the last 30-years, he told me with a chuckle and sigh of relief that not a single project that required “state” or “federal” assistance would have found conventional funding, as there came no worthwhile project with a ROI that was even close too sound business practices – so in comes Uncle Sam to save the day. And of course the state has thrown away its fair share of money, with the AIDEA relief project program. See, that outfit lost money on its first venture, with the AutoGenisis thing, and continues to this day to be open for abuse – like with the Healy Coal Plant. NOT learning from our mistakes is this state's biggest mistake! Funding for a blueberry farm? Look, those blue things aren't “blueberries”, but wannabes. Maine has blueberries! Yet with the “Failures”, there is enough blame to go around, enough historic evidence to indicate we have blown it in the “project for something” category, but why strangle the money spigot, as we still have plenty of it to be distributed in return for “crap”! And the military has been held hostage to spend money on these “Failures”, dictated by the crocks in Washington. Why in hell do we need a rocket launcher on Kodiak Island – with no rockets to throw into space? Why does the Alaska Railroad get to swindle $45-million away from the U.S. Taxpayers – year after year after year without being accused of breaking the law? Why do the Koch Brothers - or maybe it's Joe Uselessbelli - get to own “our track” for purposes of a lucrative tax write-off along with a generous “transport credit” courtesy the goons in control the Rail board? Bill Sheffield, well he is the Godfather this failed state, sorry “The Don”. Look, like it or leave it, this state has amused more ways to rip off the system that maybe it is time to write a book about it. Title and drum roll please: “How To Cheat Uncle Sam Every Which Way But Loose 101”, a primer for corrupt politicians wanting to move to Juneau. What you mean Sarah has one in print? It has become an abusive system, wherein there exists today many Alaskans that rely on this pilferage, these “Projects to Nowhere”, as many have carved a career out of the “waste not want” cycle and are not about to let decency enter the picture - to spoil their extravagant lifestyle. Honestly, in a report by the G-men, taxpayer money misappropriated to Alaska since “statehood” has cerated more millionaires then all the state sponsored lotteries combined! The best abuse of taxpayer money came about when Ted found money to study the penis size of the male Muskox? The jury is still out on that one because nobody in their right mind....Anyway, will this state ever sigh relief upon a successful project that has merit above just creating “construction” type jobs? Don Young has been adamant that he gives not a rat's ass if that “Bridge to Nowhere” has ever a passable road system attached, as long as it is built – for the “jobs” only creation benefit. Does Don still think there should be a bounty on “Rabid Skunks”? So keep the construction jobs coming our way, it buys votes and we continue to stay addicted to a crazed system of economic survival that relies on a handout! “Zero” sustainability is what it amounts to. Look, why in hell do we pay for runway maintenance in Galena, when that place has not seen a fighter jet for the last 10-years? But the money keeps on coming! And I doubt it that there will ever come a sigh of relief, as I have already lost faith, that there will ever come a successful project wherein the state or Alaska delegation becomes involved that has meaning – except just more highway robbery. Look, this state still can't get it right with road lane paint. That paint seems to vanish within weeks of being applied! Once again, it is designed that way as the IBEW maintains a contract for the painting, so it produces many seasonal jobs by utilizing “vanishing paint” – to hell with road safety. The highways in and out of Anchorage suck, are unsafe and this state spends more money for black-top then does the entire east coast! Along with that sentiment that we have failed in just about every category modern man has a stake upon, it may be just too damn late to change the rotten ways we have become addicted upon – namely corruption. But, success was never the goal! Get that through your stubbornness. See, “Failure 434” indicates yet another “mark” in this state's failure to foster, grow and maintain a sustainable jobs infrastructure. It is the Numero Uno task of any respectable government – wherein we have as of today not even tried at opening our eyes and ears this requirement. And it never should have gotten so far off track, so far out of whack, but it was planned this way – get it? Some saw what was going on in the beginning, some warned of what would come should we continue to listen to what the representative body said and did, especially what was coming down from the Alaska delegation. It was the ultimate “mission accomplished with us or against us” threat. Some in the know saw what was happening, as corruption was always the top priority above anything else. Don't believe me, look what has happened to the decency of Congress – missing in action and an approval rating that is a crying out loud shame. And that didn't occur overnight, it took time to become so disengaged, and we all know all too well that our state's delegation had a whole lot in common with the disconnect – wherein “Loyal Street” was detoured over to “K Street”. Yes indeed, we had individuals that saw and witnessed early on what was about to go down if the evil ways and means of governance continued forward unchallenged. We were a young state, with the ink of “statehood” still runny so susceptible to “scams”. But anybody that spoke up early on, well they found themselves in the unemployment ranks for sure. Yes, in the beginning when oil bucks started to sweeten the pot, their came a few that went out on a line and spoke up as to the correct and righteous way to go forward, with a sustainable jobs infrastructure goal as the top priority, and were quickly pounced upon. We saw interests in foreign trade zones, international marketing, exports, but all was just a show-stopping trap. See, it ain't rocket science as to the correct way to operate, to perform for the good in efforts to advance the cause. But it is the political science of blasphemy that finds a ways & means to cheat the system, that is what has happened and finally after 30-plus years of abuse, it is coming home to haunt us. Basically, we as citizens of the 49er that braved the “Last Frontier” for a new life, well we were drugged and raped at the same time and our children came out of the womb also addicted. Sad times are ahead for the “Last Frontier”, best pack your bags now and divest yourself this romance over the 49er, as it is not too late to get out of Dodge before it is too late. Don't believe me, then why is Conoco thinking of packing up and sending their Anchorage office staff to warmer climates, where they have a guarantee that there will be affordable energy? See, the “Tower” was warmed that it is on the gas curtailment list! BP is trying to divest also, so read the writing on the wall! And with Anchorage becoming the rape and domestic violence capital of the world because Wayne Anthony Ross – once a candidate for the governor's seat and a well respected church going man about town – well he condones rape upon one's own wife and believes all women should keep their mouth's shut – as that is the cause of “Domestic Violence” so widespread this northern hamlet. He's an attorney that believes “rape” is not a crime, I guess he hasn't lost his license, yet! That statistic of “rape & violence” is telling tourists to stay away from the “Big Wild”! Now the drug addiction came by way of Ted Stevens, Don Young and Frank Moussorgsky – a.k.a. The Three Stooges - through years of abuse with the appropriations handouts – a.k.a. “Uncle Sam Pork”. It was not a good thing what our representative body worked towards, as it was not a bonafide benefit, as we had oil and lots of it! But that was the plan, let “Big Oil” slide away with riches and at the same time get us addicted to the free-loading – with Uncle Sam handouts and every form possible, wherein the camouflage of the loot took on an entirely different demeanor. Taxpayer money has headed to Alaska the last 30-years in ways only crooks could dream up. We didn't need Uncle Sam's help – get it? And we had other resources that could have benefited this state's growing pains, without having to become Uncle Sam's favorite recipient of other hard working Americans' loot. Alaska, like it or not is still Uncle Sam's “Poster Child” for welfare, corporate welfare included! With the Obama “Stimulus”, Alaska realizes 3x the national average per household head! Yes, in the beginning, we had lots of gold and coal that to this day sees very little value its true worth as guaranteed through this state's Constitutional mandate – that the resources belong to the residents. The politicians understand this, but fail to act. So that must be a typo in the state constitution. With time on their side - the crooked politicians that is - we went happy with things, basically because we were blind as a crop of bats and at the same time we thought things were rosy and we seemed to like being considered the ultimate lemming population - yet we were being robbed by our own representation that said “Trust Us”. It is no different today. And during the time Alaska was trying to establish itself worthy of “Statehood”, we also had a legislative body that was afraid of going crossed-eyed-wise with the “Stooges” and therefore we never weened ourselves away from the beltway giveaway – a feeding frenzy on steroids that is the only legacy we find with Theodore Armageddon Stevens. Why write a “legacy” book, as it would be nothing more then comic relief, except maybe daddy knew what Ben did for Enstar while being paid a handsome sum of $70000 – that was in addition his state senate salary. Like I said, it would be just more comic relief but if laughter is the best medicine, why not get to the bottom of things as laughter is all we will ever get out of this ramshackle state of affairs. Answer me this. Isn't it time to rename the airport, maybe in honor of a true Alaskan hero, like “Susan Butcher”? Go to hell Ted! And anybody that still thinks Ted was good for this state, think again. Maybe that is where he rests! In the end, we saw that road to riches lead to a road of corruption, wherein today we are beginning to see the aftermath. As true Americans from sea to shining sea realize that we must change our ways, that we must reign in the out-of-control spending habits made so treason like tempting for opportunist - like we found in practice with Ted and Don - wherein their trademark of “rape & pillage” became what others started fighting for, wherein raiding of the hen-house was first and foremost, there is a reality that we must slow down – which means dire times for Alaska. Still, when one looks at what is occurring with the military here in Alaska, the abuse of our delegation continues on today. When the military brass are given marching orders and they act or else, well as soon as it appears that a base here in Alaska is on the chopping block - not for any political reason but based solely on sane economic good reasoning - in come the crocks to put up every kind of roadblock. Come on Mr. Begich, the aging bases in Alaska have no longer a stay for the modern day war machine and are an obstacle to modern day protection. But Mark along with MoanaLisa, they say they are only doing their job, by keeping jobs, as they failed us even more as they had the chance to right their predecessors failures, to legislate with some sense of ethics – just ask Bill Allen. But kicking a habit is not an easy thing. Anybody who has an ounce of sense must realize that the state of Alaska has been and will continue to be the “biggest” welfare state on the U.S. Treasury books. We gave away the oil, gave away a whole lot of gold, made Mr. Uselessbelli rich with “our” coal, and our only saving grace was “natural gas”. But we have blown it there also, as it is too damn late to build the infrastructure for marketing – maybe we can revisit that possibility in 2050! So because they are afraid to admit defeat, as that may mean they would have to return back to the working-class ranks because we are fed up with the their corrupt shenanigans and vote then back into the gutter, well we see today where another crock speaks out. "Right now it's a lot of talk," state representative Chenault said. "So until we get to a point where we have a project on the table, it's all talk." Look, a gas line for the people has been just that for 30 some years by now, “all talk”. Do you really think Joe Uselessbelli wants a gas line interfering with his lucrative coal business? The entire state of affairs is inflicted with that disease of corruption and I am lost for words of what to do – except leave this land for the wildlife that so deserves it. In fact, now that we have given away the resource, give the mountains back to the Russians! Look, we cannot start over because we blew the one clear chance to become an independent state. It was the corrupt influence of Ted, Don and Frank that “Pi-eyed Pippered” us into this mess, and now all but one has run for cover. Don knows what has occurred, but feels it was the correct thing too do. Bottom-line, when the state of Alaska flip-flopped and turned Red” faced, we signed a death warrant and accepted rape, incest - a.k.a. nepotism - as a ways and means to move ahead. And since then, we have not bothered to access what it all means, how we have nothing too stand on, and with that, Parnell still insists on giving what little that is left away to foreigners - caving in and giving it all away. OK, I am in agreement with one thing that comes out of the Explosive Diarrhea orifice of Ted Nugent, “I hate foreigners”, especially when we see all of our resource value being given away to outsiders. Look, political WAR chest subscribers and suppliers get more out of Alaska's wealth then do its residents, the verdict is in on this laughing state of affairs. Look, we give our oil wealth away to foreigners. We give our gold away to foreigners, We give our coal away cheap to foreigners. Don't believe me, well Korea can buy coal from Joe cheaper then can the Defense Logistics Agency, as competition rules. See, if Joe goes stingy on the Korean exports, they find a better deal somewhere in Canada. So It sucks, this mentality that is bent on destroying the words of JFK; “Ask not...”. Alaska has not been a good neighbor our lower-48 brothers & sisters. Blame it on corrupt politicians that think they could pull the wool over us, feed us hamburger helper while they entertained themselves with Don Perignon and caviar. But it catches up, and when the smoke clears here in a few months that we gave away close to a billion dollars to an outside interest - another foreigner - not interested at all in our gas and only interested in incest and rape, we get what we deserve – a BIG NOTHING. That is it in a nutshell. So today we celebrate yet another mark for the VECO grill, the one that Don was famous for using to entice corruption as a ways and means to make the 49er a true looser, it has a hack mark for every failed project - like somebody wanted it this way. Chalking up a loss for us time and time again, yet it was always a win for them and friends. One last thing, what does it take to be considered one of their friends? Sorry, not this guy. And here it is, a sure sign that would make one rethink that there is still “hope” on the horizon. When we say NO to stupid projects like trying to measure the penis size of a wild animal, when we say NO to abuse upon appropriations and buy some decent paint, when such allows residents to not get stuck in the political doldrums of “seasonal jobs forever” and find they must dig into that “Last Frontier“ spirit for survival, then maybe we have a chance of at least admitting our weaknesses and getting weened away from obstructionist like living. Until that time, we remain the laughing stock and our children will never see the light of day, even when the 24-hour light of summer disrupts the dark side of Alaskan politics! Our legacy, seems like the “VECO Grill” tells it all!

Don't Eat That Salmon!

That salmon you purchased in the latter of 2010, or any salmon processed at the “Campus” in downtown Anchorage around that time still in your possession, you may consider downing a protective face mask and surgical gloves to secure it away in seal-tight baggies and asking for a refund! And don't throw it away in the dump, as that is illegal and you could find yourself facing John Law! So, get a refund and let the fish processor worry about the “proper” disposal. See, if that stuff was processed at the “Campus” in downtown Anchorage, well that salt like lick on the fish flesh may be something else, like “friable asbestos”. The company that runs the “Campus” was just fined, by the U.S. District Court, as the company management knew buildings used to process salmon and other fish contained dangerous levels of asbestos, but ordered workers to demolish such structures for renovation in March 2010. “Prosecutors say the work put friable chrysotile asbestos - the most common variety - into the air”. Sure its the most common, and one of the most scary because it is well known to promote mesothelioma. Experts in the field will tell you this, that it only takes a single fiber to cause the “meso”. Yes, a single loose fiber falling on the smoked salmon or lox then consumed, it could cause you to end up with one of those breathing bottles and fending for your life as some attorney tries to nail down where that “fiber” came from in the who's to blame game? According to one prominent law group well versed in asbestos litigation, “...ninety percent or more of the illnesses and deaths associated with asbestos exposure have been brought on by chrysotile asbestos fibers.” We are fortunate to some extent in Alaska, as the existing Workmen's Compensation guidelines allows a claim for the “meso” to be not barred by any statute of limitations. Remember, this dreaded disease takes time to show its ugly face. But is you were just trying to enjoy a piece of comfort, good luck trying to defend the fact that it was somebody else's disregard that sent you to an early death bed! So, don't eat that stuff that may have been subject to asbestos contamination, as this stuff when disturbed, it can get into clothing, carried into air intakes, you name it. And it was from a demolition, which finds all kinds of out-of-control battering! If that salmon was any where near close this operation, even the processing equipment if not de-contaminated following this disregard to proper disposal, you may be at RISK! It is that simple. Mind you, the management knew about it and demanded workers to continue on. WHY? Look, I just went through an asbestos abatement process, covered by my home-owner's insurance. I was faced with some roof leaks following trees falling during the “Big Anchorage Bowl Blow”, which punctured then stained a small portion of the ceiling. But it was that pop-corn ceiling, the kind that has asbestos sparkles embedded for a reflective effect. It is somewhat safe because it is not friable and being higher up, it remains for the most part undisturbed. But industrialists and insurance agents will not let workers get involved with any kind of re-work wherein there exists a possibility of contamination – due to concerns of liability! So it required a careful and expensive abatement process to repair the damage, $17k, as my entire house was turned into a protective cocoon. Yes, it looked like a scene from Mars, those guys in protective suits, air sampling, three days of abatement work for a small house – after that, a $5 dollar can of paint fixed it up. It was costly, not the paint from Home Depot, but getting rid of the asbestos according to LAW. So the reason, look management is stupid at times when it comes to the bottom-line. MONEY said contaminate downtown Anchorage! Remember, all it takes is a single fiber entering the wrong human orifice – then we must wait as that seed of destruction takes years to develop into a cancer causing tumor. So if you were around downtown in March of 2010, when this stuff was in the air, it may be too late. Yes, that seed may have already been planted and it is just a matter of time before you start choking up blood, yellow matter custard - yuck. Hail to the worker that blew the whistle on this criminal activity and not only stopped it, it is now of record. Sad thing, the fine and probation is nothing as I am sure this venture is a multi-million dollar extravaganza controlled from a mansion in the lower-48 – so the management is laughing all the way to the bank and really doesn't give a rat's ass about anybody's health and welfare and concerned only about their own wealth! Merry Christmas IDIOT! It is tough for justice and the judgment, as no real harm can be proved just yet, with evidence that wayward friable asbestos fibers has harmed anyone - it takes a whole lot of time for this disease to develop. But if you think you may have inhaled a fiber from this activity, you may be in time able to go after the estate, just remember the case number from the EPA. So what is this “friable” thing anyway? If you have ever been around friable asbestos, look out! And a good example of how it reacts to a disturbance, it is like a mature puff-ball mushroom, with all those spores going airborne from the slightest of pokes, thousands of teensy-weensy little fibers suddenly airborne and not intimidated by the slightest of an inlet breeze, to go every which way loose. That's what happens when once good asbestos has diminished in character and becomes disturbed by idiots thinking they can get away with it. Jail time should have been the ticket herein, but like already mentioned, trying to prove to a jury that there could be future damage, it is tough. The system does not work that way. What harm “now” skews the verdict making it tough for a righteous penalty. Fortunate thing, this outfit was caught red-handed and the prosecution has warned that asbestos fibers did enter the Anchorage breathing air, which gives you a one-up for future litigation. So if you were in and around downtown Anchorage, around 5^th Avenue or may have consumed any product that may have been contaminated during this demolition experiment over at the “Campus”, jot that down in your diary, and for heavens sake - Boycott?

BOEHNER PETS

OK, so Eric Cantor has asked for more detail as to why MY Christmas wish included a request for someone to “crap” on the GOP whipping boy, I mean “Water Boy”! See, Cantor walks around the House of Congress with this “Big Guy” attitude surrounded by a bunch of henchmen, acting out his fantasies as “Teflon Don”. Where's the salami? Now according to accurate and reliable triangulation calculations using House artifacts, and this calculation performed by none other then famed super-scientist Phineas J. Whoopee assisted by his 3DBB magical arithmetic board, well Cantor is in reality about 4-foot 3-inches tall. So maybe a little fertilizer will help him grow up! Now since MY 1^st Christmas wish list went pubic, I have found free time to do more on-line shopping, for ideas, and must amend MY list. You have heard about those Chia Pets - American styled terracotta figurines used to sprout chia, wherein the chia sprouts within a couple of weeks with a little tender loving care and resembles animal fur - well we now find “Boehner Pet Dolls” becoming a favorite. The “Boehner Pet Dolls” come to you as true to life figurines of your favorite Congressional representative, in the nude! Along with the figurine, a spray bottle of Axiron, the testosterone under arm spray. Axiron is that same stuff you see the landscape “seeding” companies spraying on the side of the road following “Bridge to Nowhere” construction, the “green matter custard” like substance which grows grass anywhere - even on a dead dog's eye. So with a little tender loving care, a spray of Axiron here, a spray there on the genital area, look too see which representative grows balls before the upcoming 113^th. So get yours while supplies last! And wait there's more....Now being from the state of Alaska, don't make MY wish come true with a Don Young replica Boehner Pet Doll, as we all know Don will never have any balls. And Mark Begich, he's a confirmed eunuch when it comes too the Tea-Party! So I am left with MoanaLisa MurCowpie to experiment on, with the “ball” growing thing – talk about yuletide yuck! But since I am amending MY wish list, in all honesty, how about 99 Bernie Sanders to replace the hypocrite Senate members NOT in good standing the American citizens along with another 433 Bernie Sanders, to replace the House hypocrites also NOT in good standing popular American opinion. Imagine what this country could get done if we had the likes of Bernie Sanders working with the Obama & Biden team? May MY wishes come true!