Autumn Detour

Following summer, it is nice to have a little bit of the autumn season before that termination dust descends down the Chugach Mountain chute and allows the roads around Anchorage to become a death corral for pedestrians. What do you mean that is the case all year long? Do you realize that Anchorage has more pedestrian fatalities then murders and this city is still one of the top ten in the homicide category! And rape is still a horrendous problem, even though MoanaLisa "Trust Me" Murkowski said she was too fix that with Federal intervention, that was 6-years ago and we are still awakened to this atrocity upon our sisterhood. I hope voters remember this when the nepotism senator is up for re-election! So with such a lovely autumn upon us so far, I decided to venture around town and take in the Jack Frost artwork. But I couldn't get downtown! It was great to have the Elmore extension closed again, as the engineers that designed this bottleneck were "Left Behind" in the brilliance category, so it means a whole lot of rework, which satisfies my displeasure for that road. I hope they never get this road working right, as when it is closed it gives my neighborhood peace and quiet like it used to remember. Then to make getting downtown even more difficult, the Darling Dowling Road Round-About was closed, "again". See, it is another blunder in the list of road project failures so there is this constant redesign attempt to make us believe these idiots behind the drafting boards know what they are doing to relieve traffic congestion in Anchorage. And they say it is a cheaper way to go, these about face road rage amplifiers that now require speed "humps". And I have a bridge to somewhere for sale! Now don't get offended, as using the word "idiot" is justified as I have never witnessed such crappy traffic control and I have traveled throughout many major cities wherein once a road is set it doesn't require digging it up for "We forgot something"! Now with Elmore blocked off and the "bout" down for the count, it meant most of my exits to downtown were blocked, which meant navigating the Lake Otis Parkway, which is like taking your life not seriously! Especially in the wasted time category, as there are more traffic lights on this main artery then the entire length of New York City's 5th Avenue. In fact, one could probably navigate 5th Avenue faster! Here though, it is stop and go traffic without traffic and without any semblance of traffic light coordination. Does the guy in charge of putting up traffic lights get a bonus for how many un-necessary lights get constructed, like it is a big game? Now I know "stimulus" money has no transparency so is probably being wasted putting up new fandangle LED lights when the ones in service are still in good shape, but there has to be something wrong with this mentality of "build to destroy". So I ask this because I am still just limping along at 20-mph and fear that the snow will arrive before I get to my destination. Isn't false advertising illegal, or at least something the consumer affairs should be looking out for, to protect our interests? Then how come the DOT posts all these road speed signs when no way in hell can a motorist ever get even close to that posted speed? There is not one road in Anchorage, except maybe side streets with "No Exit" - mini RoundAbouts - wherein one can get up to the posted speed. It goes to show that something is wrong with the road design program the designers are using! But finally, after braving every traffic light and being on alert as drive-by shootings are also common in Anchorage at any time of the day - just ask Rick the biologist - I made it to my destination. Wow, maybe it was worth the time wasted, to see the artwork! See, the best foliage color is down at the low-income housing between A & C Streets, just along the "Greenbelt". When this place was built many years ago, there came a variety of trees planted. And unlike the bastards that live along the bluff who sneak out at night and massacre foliage just so they can enjoy their expensive view of the inlet, the poor folk have let the trees enjoy life. So now most of the tress are mature and the colors from the different varieties left standing are showing off. Anyway, it is time to try and get back south, but I forgot it is PFD weekend, so the highways are filled with crazed shoppers heading to the malls and all DOT roads lead to? It's anybodies guess!