My Book Endorsement

Upon listening to the pundits try in vain to figure out what Sarah Palin is up too, it is evident that those that practice the 1st Amendment outside of Alaska are completely lost in limbo. So I have just signed a book deal that isn’t quite as lucrative as Sarah’s, but at least it gets my name as an author recognized. The book is titled, “Alaska Politics for Dumber then Dumb Pundits”. Since it is only three pages in length, I have reproduced those pages for the viewers’ enjoyment. In actuality, the book is over 500-pages in length, but many of those pages are “Intentionally Left Blank”, just like in George Bush’s memoirs.

Chapter 1 & Only – Why Sarah Quit

Well it wasn’t really quitting. See, Don Young has decided to quit his U.S. House of Representative seat as a representative for “All” Alaska. Alaska has but a single seat in the House, so it is a very honored and time proven powerful position, or it was that way once upon a time. He had a tough year. His wife was ill and by a miracle, she made it through tough times. And on top of that, Don is under investigation by the entire cast of government run oversight agencies, with evidence of collaboration going all the way back to the Abranoff scandal. One of Don’s staff members is already behind bars, so the fallout of it all is still falling from the sky but has not hit ground “zero”, not just yet. So Don has coughed up in excess of a million dollars to defend himself. This money from his political campaign “war chest” – donations from special interest. At one time in history Don and Ted Stevens had the pot of gold that kept on giving. Ted is gone. Don, on his last limb with respect to political clout. Hey, if not so guilty then why all the extra curricular activity with the wallet? So Don is most likely doomed. He knows it. And he has lost most of his clout, now that Pelosi is in charge and holds a grudge for when Don called her a “Rabid Skunk”. And big deal that Don wanted Congress to pass a measure that would allow a bounty on the beast. So rumor has it that he has made the prudent decision to step down due distractions, in efforts to let someone else focus in, as it takes away from his time wherein he should be focused on constituent issues. See, when Sarah made it clear and convincing that things were getting in the way of her efforts to run government, she was really talking about Don’s decision. That is why it is so difficult for the dumbbell pundits to get real on this issue. It is Alaska politics at its best! So there has been hatched out a plan behind closed doors, wherein Sarah resigns and soon Don will do the same, like peas in a pod. Now Sarah would have been the official to replace any vacancy with respect to Alaska’s lone House seat. But no way could she get away with doing herself in. So she resigns and gives a little time wherein the majority of the dumbbell pundits will forget she was a quitter without reason and then when the Don retires, Sarah will be the one called upon to fill that vacancy. It is almost official that the Don will step down, as the verdict of “not guilty” is too far removed by this time in the “Corrupt Bastards Club” game. So the “new” acting Alaska governor will get to fill that vacancy with none other then Sarah Palin! See, all the Newts have voiced that Palin - in order to survive her political aspirations - has to show leadership. And this retreat shows just the opposite, so she needs something brilliant to incite that she is not a quitter and a leader by default, and what better then a seat in the House of Congress. Just like Katherine Harris! And were else can Sarah show the rest of the country how stupid she is, in the Congress! So there is only a miniscule time lapse wherein Palin will not be in a role of responsibility, I mean photo-op limelight. Soon it will be, “House of Horrors Representative Sarah Palin (R) Alaska”. And then Don can sit back and deal with book deals, like his new memoir titled, “Palin, Revenge Upon Pelosi - the Rabid Skunk of Congress”.